That’s the truth.

lansburysoda · 2021-08-27T20:31:52+00:00

If you’ve been on more than just a few dates and you feel confused and stressed all the time, he doesn’t like you.

Wild_Artio · 2021-08-28T01:17:44+00:00

I do not fully agree with this.

It’s not so black and white, and because society puts more pressure on women to be “chosen” this perspective ends up with the unfortunate conclusion of the women not being “good enough” bc he doesn’t like her. Fuck that noise. If he’s inconsistent. You don’t want him. Period. You don’t like him. This “he doesn’t like you” bs frames it as though if you were someone different he’d be consistent. SO WRONG. And… beyond that, it encourages a pickmeisha mentality of competition and staying to be enough… instead of framing it from an empowering perspective of… if he’s inconsistent… he’s not likable.

It also fails to recognize attachment styles, personality disorders (which our society is breeding in the form of narcissism) or poor character.

For instance…A person can be avoidant attachment and therefore inconsistent bc they’re very uncomfortable with relational intimacy. It’s not that they don’t like you, it’s that they don’t value intimacy the same. And they won’t magically change for the perfect person (there is no perfect person)… they’ll settle down when they’re old and have no choice and their wife will not feel seen, heard or valued.

Narcissists, they just care way too much about their fragile ego to focus on anything outside of that. This will also come off as inconsistency.

Addictions can also create an avoidant attached partner who can’t put in effort for anything as much as their addiction (work, gaming, gambling, drugs, tv, alcohol, exercise, etc).

REGARDLESS of the reason WHY they’re inconsistent… the what is… inconsistency is unsafe and unstable and is a poor basis for a reciprocal relationship. Inconsistency is not likable. You’re lovable, THEY are not enough.

warinmymind94 · 2021-08-27T18:23:37+00:00

100%. If a man actually genuinely likes you he WILL be making effort and will be pursing you. He should be at least touching base with you every day NO matter how "busy" he is. He should be putting effort into the conversations, and be making time no matter how busy his schedule to see you. Period.

Don't chase him, don't be texting him paragraphs, don't fall for the slow fade BS, don't buy into the whole "communicate" that you need more from him trope, just stop wasting your own time and move on.

basicbagels · 2021-08-27T19:44:32+00:00

If he wanted to, he would!

Kimpractical · 2021-08-27T23:30:07+00:00

Yes that’s true, he doesn’t like you buuuut… he will never properly like anyone or ever treat a woman with any real respect. An HVM doesn’t lead on or use a woman he’s not interested in. He will be up front and honest with her about how she’s not the one for him and then leave her alone so she can move on and find someone else she’s more compatible with. So yes, the inconsistent scrote is not that into you, but it’s not your fault and you deserve better, no one will ever be good enough for him and the woman he does eventually marry will be miserable. Be glad it’s not you

HoneyBouquet · 2021-08-27T17:35:51+00:00

I have a NVM ex who treated me like shit for 10 months. For ages I thought it was me who did something wrong. I would beat myself up for it. I would have to ask him for the bare minimum of asking how my day was or calling me He never got me any thoughtful gifts or remembered important stuff about me or what I liked.

2 years later, I hear he hasn't changed at all and still treats women horribly. He hasnt proposed to his girlfriend of a year and a half lmao.

Now looking back, he just didn't like me. Because if he did he would have made the effort to please me and make me happy and not fucking sad and paranoid all the time.

After my breakup, I met a HVM (sadly it didnt work out because we have different religions) who would work 18 hours a day and set alarms on his phone to call me. He remembered every little thing about me and encouraged me to continue with my writing and being independent from my south Asian family. Just me simply existing or talking to him would make him happy. He didnt care about talking about sex most of the time and complimented me on my intelligence (I mostly get complimented on looks only).

If he wanted to, he would have.

modernmedusaa · 2021-08-28T06:55:48+00:00

Some of these men don’t even like THEMSELVES and project this on women

Who cares- bye scrote

pozzalovah · 2021-08-30T00:04:56+00:00

Honestly, these kind of posts kinda hurtled my feeling at first but after a while you get to the point where you know a guy liking you is not an accomplishment at all.

Title	That’s the truth.
Author	blueboobs-
Upvotes	922
Comments	21
Date	August 27, 2021 4:26 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pcqpzn/thats_the_truth/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/thats-the-truth.1065398 https://theredarchive.com/post/1065398

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