How much should your initial physical attraction to a potential partner matter?

raspberry_rain · 2020-11-20T18:19:28+00:00

I think it definitely matters to an extent. Maybe my brain works weird but I have sort of a mental minimal attraction threshold. If I find you physically UNATTRACTIVE there’s no amount of personality that can overcome that. But if I find you average/above average but not necessarily smoking hot your personality can make all the difference in the world.

cast-away-ramadi06 · 2020-11-20T18:53:27+00:00

A man's perspective - I've has this conversation a lot with friends when we were in our 20's and with guys I mentor now that I'm in my 30's. I think it's a journey all men go on.

What I advise them is that a real relationship is an investment, not an impulse buy. Just like no investment is perfect and without risk, so to a relationship. The trick is to figure out what we can live with and what we can't, and to realize that almost all of us get uglier as we age. I always say it's ok to have a few quirks and hang up in the physical department, we all have them and that's normal. But we have to seperate out preferences from hard requirements. I have a preference for green eyes and red hair, but that would be a silly thing to make a requirement.

IcarusKiki · 2020-11-20T18:15:56+00:00

There’s gotta be some spark even if he isn’t a model.

Throwaway230306 · 2020-11-20T18:32:33+00:00

A man's personality/charisma/intellect/talent/etc. can certainly spark physical attraction, where without these qualities a man would seem physically unattractive.

Physical attraction early on is very important if you're aiming for a successful romantic relationship, it's the source of a woman's organic (as opposed to dutiful) submission and respect for a man.

Edit: "Early on" doesn't necessarily mean at first sight, but in the early stages (months, even 1-2 years) of the relationship, which is typically the most exciting and sexual time for most couples.

Underground-anzac-99 · 2020-11-21T05:01:51+00:00

There is also that more illusive chemistry. I’ve dated physically attractive guys who were also smart, charming and nice but felt nothing when they tried to kiss me. I’ve also dated less attractive guys where there was that spark. It depends for everyone but if yr never attracted to him, skip it as it’s unfair on both of you.

FlouncyMcTwinkle · 2020-11-20T17:35:54+00:00

Loads. It matters loads. Dont date someone that doesn’t give you tingles!

2020-11-20T19:00:38+00:00

The only thing that matters to me is his personality and more importantly how our value systems match. I used to have a height deal breaker that is atleast has to match up to my height, but recently I've come to realise that too can be overlooked.

Everyone is different, but everyone changes

thebirdlandgirl · 2020-11-20T19:24:52+00:00

I think it matters to a cetrain extend, you need to be able to feel attracted to this person. However, i don't think the intial attraction is that important. Even if you don't find someone physically attractive at first sight, this is something that should not be the defining factor to get to know someone and go on a few dates. His looks can grown on you and his personality might make him more attractive, he doesn't need to be your "type". However if you don't think there it any chance of finding him attractive don't waste your time, or his.

Also take in account that some single men often don't care that much about their looks. ;)

pixxi- · 2020-11-26T16:03:43+00:00

i think emotional, physical & spiritual attraction are all valid important. life is about balance.

Davidoff24 · 2020-11-27T08:15:48+00:00

It does matter. After all, I will be intimate with that man, I have to feel attracted to him. However, it is not only physical traits per se that make him attractive in my case. Sometimes I found that I started looking at a man with different eyes once I discovered his sense of humour or intelligence.

Title	How much should your initial physical attraction to a potential partner matter?
Author	whowhatwhenwherewaee
Upvotes	10
Comments	15
Date	November 20, 2020 5:12 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/jxt20b/how_much_should_your_initial_physical_attraction/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-much-should-your-initial-physical-attraction.1068066 https://theredarchive.com/post/1068066

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