i talked to a girl i found attractive for the first time ever in college and her boyfriend ended up staring at me so intensely my leg shook and just about fell over. i go to class (that happened during the summer, and it wasnt just her boyfriend, some fat guy charged at me like pretending to attack me) and people are just laughing at me. i lived in complete hate and anger for 2 years and they really never fucked off. i didnt even attend graduation. i graduated in 3 years total and finally got a full time software dev job (CS major) 7 months after graduating with just 2 months part time contract experience. i still feel the anger and hate. this one person i cant stop thinking about who just stared me for like 30 seconds and i stared back because i felt disrespected and he just stuck his nose up at me. my career is actually beginning i got a 66,500 software job and ill be able to get another one no problem. i still feel like somethings missing. i never confronted them. ill never be able to dominate that guy back who dominated me and its driving me crazy. after reading the delta terminology i feel like im doomed to be a delta or beta male. to make it even worse, that guy and his girlfriend drove by me smiling and waving at me acting like we are friends. whats wrong with me? why do i feel awful, shitty, angry, miserable despite having a lot going for me. i only have like 12,000 student debt.
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