I knew this literal mama's boy. He was a self proclaimed redpill 35 year old virgin who had lived with his mom his entire life (redpill was less stigmatized back then). We met while doing a seasonal job and at the time his mother and him shared a bedroom in employee housing so that's cool! He sat around watching movies all day, smoking weed and playing video games. The legitimate loser stereotype. He had never been away from living with his mom they simply traveled together finding work and had even been homeless together at one point. This man was a poor, sexist loser and also angry, bald, short and fat. I'm bringing up appearance because it's relevant to the story and also because he had a huge complex about being short and went off on how women discriminated and he could never get someone because he was short (yeah bro, no other legitimate reasons a lady wouldn't like you and also every short man in the world is a single virgin. You should be in a protected class cus all the discrimination you face).

When I first met this guy he was really nice to me. I had NO idea this guy liked me. I never would have dated him but also had no clue unlike our coworkers. We got a new coworker and to this day this man is the most beautiful person I've ever met. I had a huge crush on him (had not matured yet and was swayed by looks alone) and told the mamas boy. He described him as a Chad and went on a tirade asking why I would want some dumb jock (engineer) who was nothing more than a pretty face. His questions were rhetorical, he'd lost ALL respect for me now. After that day the mamas boy became a bully because I liked someone that was nothing like him.

Its not just him, I've had countless people in my life tell me to literally settle or become disappointed in me for not accepting the phone number of someone that I'm not attracted to etc. For years I had supposed friends tell me I was a bad guy for rejecting a mutual friend who wouldn't accept that we'd never date after 2 years of bothering me. Instead of telling him to move on they said that I needed to give him a chance and settle. The conclusion was that I ended my friendship with the creepy guy and all the fake friends. Men are encouraged to go for whoever they want and women are supposed to conform for his pleasure. Nah son.

My family is the same way and I basically cut my father off because he wanted me to get back with an abusive ex that I dumped because to my father any man is better than no man. They are really saying "you're not worth better" and then I actually do better and they are so thrilled not at any actual accomplishments in my career or life just that I met someone. I was talking to him more for practical reasons and 2/3 of the short conversations of 5 or less minutes he asked about my love life, first time I said I'm not dating but when I am I won't tell anyone unless I have news to share a week later he asked again. I can't even.

I've had many people say it's unfair for me to want someone with a certain salary or who I'm attracted to who also treats me well and respects me. I've never had a single HVW or man criticize me for what I'm looking for in a partner and I'm not unreasonable. I used to say I am shallow and shrug like lol I'm not perfect but I'm not even shallow, I'm someone who would rather date well or enjoy the single life. I'm also conventionally attractive and see nothing wrong with also wanting that in a partner, even if I wasn't that's not outrageous. I have met countless men who look like crap and go for supermodels without any insecurity. I think society thinks women are meant to be objects with no agency and no desire of our own. By being verbal about my preferences I'm not being a good object woman. Oh DEAR!

I'm done apologizing for having a type and preferences for those I date. I also sometimes don't date, like right now I've got too much going on. I'm not crying about it. It's good to know what you are looking for in a partner. If I'm a Bitch great! I'd rather be a bad bitch than the sad sack of shit I was when I was spending all my money and crying all the time over abusive boyfriends. Also just want to say that if I and women like me are bitches for having standards this should also apply to all men especially those like mamas boy above who went for every amazing girl in the hotel. I'm going to start reclaiming the language and some of the behaviors of men and be absolutely unapologetic about my desires from now on.