My son cries when I called him

-CloudHopper- · 2022-09-13T07:12:43+00:00

I hope this isn’t upsetting, but is it possible he doesn’t remember/recognise you? And he’s just reacting as if you’re a stranger? 6 months is a long time when you’re that tiny.

So sorry you’re going through this ☹️

MAGA-Latino · 2022-09-13T01:51:19+00:00

Sorry man but that definitely is the mother putting things into his head to make him afraid of you.

SteveorJimmyorJack · 2022-09-13T02:11:36+00:00

It would be a good idea to have someone make the kid talk. What she is doing is terrible for you and for the kid. It will mark his whole life.

Riptionator · 2022-09-13T03:46:31+00:00

Look up "Parental Alienation Syndrome" I'm not saying this is it but if your ex is manipulating your son it could turn into this. It happened to a buddy of mine when his daughter was abducted by her mother. He didn't get to see his daughter until she was 18 and decided to take a chance to see him despite the mother's efforts to stop her. It seemed that things got better when they met, but as soon as she went back to her mother she ghosted him.

It's had a profound impact on him. He's been depressed ever since and now she's in her 20s and won't talk to him.

weirdornxtlvl · 2022-09-13T05:56:25+00:00

"his mother wouldn’t/hasn’t allowed me" Yes the evil cunt is doing this, but don't be discouraged the boy is too young to realize what's happening, don't show him but love and keep contact, he will learn along the way and get closer and closer to you.

2022-09-13T13:02:51+00:00

If spending time with you is still new to him it might just take some time getting used to.

When my parents got divorced, every time I stayed at my moms house I would cry and say I missed my dad. I can’t imagine how horrible that must have made her feel.

Blauwpetje · 2022-09-13T11:22:43+00:00

He might very well cry because he realises he misses you. Totally normal reaction that may be misinterpreted by the mother.

Godettee · 2022-09-13T09:20:37+00:00

Wishing you luck

oceansarevast · 2022-09-13T15:23:01+00:00

It means nothing. The time span is too long, so you are no longer a part of his trust circle. A child attaches to the person feeding the mouth, just biology. Stop doing this. You are on the birth cert. Child is old enough to have independent visitation with you. Enforce it through court. Plan your alone time with him. Make small trips, eat out with him, watch a cartoon with him. Read him stories before sleep. Etc. Take a picture when he comes and as much of his body before he leaves. Don't let anybody get a hold over you.

TheAnarchistRat · 2022-09-13T19:43:54+00:00

It's possible that it's not anything serious because my grandma told me how I used to cry when I was babysat by her and that I missed my mom but now I have a good relationship with my grandma so there's a chance that he's just shy and not used to you yet

somethingneet · 2022-09-13T02:21:19+00:00

They're all burying you to your son

Neither-Ad-2475 · 2022-09-13T08:26:28+00:00

Hello, I'm sorry about your situation. Stay strong and positive, even though it's very hard.

And I agree with comment that is more common than some would think.

I'm going through exactly same think myself. My ex accused me of assault. She took my son (4 y.o. at the time) and left to NSW. She won't let me see him or talk to him since that crazy night. Not even on his bday or fday. She only reply to message "How is he?", Answer " He is fine and happy. 😠🤯 I've approached lawyer and going through court. But it feels like it's ages. My biggest fears, he will be absolutely brain washed and hate me once I'll hopefully see him or he will be begging me to not go back to his mum.

shit-zen-giggles · 2022-09-13T10:04:18+00:00

There might be "parental alienation" going on here, google it.

Depending on which country you're in, I might be able to provide you with links to organisations that might be able to help you.

blackdahlialady · 2022-09-13T14:00:25+00:00

Yep, she's coaching him. This is parental alienation and the courts don't look too kindly on it. I would get a lawyer and fight for more visitation time. Kids are resilient. It sucks but he will bounce back from this if he spends more time with you. It seems to me that she's putting things in his head to make him afraid of you. If you cannot afford a lawyer, legal aid represents people for free.

Edit: I miss the part where you said that when you were with her in a relationship and paying for her, he never did this. This is because she was fine with that because you were handing her money. Now that you're not together, she's bitter and she's doing this on purpose. Like I said, get a lawyer.

Izalias · 2022-09-13T16:43:48+00:00

Brainwashing is a terrible thing, but what she doesn't understand, but will come to... is that brainwashing only works in the short term, make a video diary of your experiences, record the calls... that sort of shit will be eaten up in a court for custody, and when the kid grows up and watches what she put you through, she might be lucky if she ever hears from their kid again.

I have seen this across three generations now, always ends the same... I don't know why women do it, probably enjoy hurting the men who want the kid as a part of their lives in order to get a slice of that child support pie, and it crushes them when the kid cuts ties.

Any_Tumbleweed_6717 · 2022-09-13T04:06:20+00:00

Women fucking suck

river_tree_nut · 2022-09-13T16:04:28+00:00

Yeah man this hits home - unfortunately I can personally sympathize. It’s a special kind of hell being alienated from your child and knowing the damage it does to them and your relationship with them.

ZenofZer0 · 2022-09-13T18:30:24+00:00

Hey man. I went through the same thing when my son was about 13 months old. It really messes them up and it fucking hurts both of you in a way that is indescribable. Evil people do that shit and I’m so sorry to hear it’s a thing for you. I’ll give you what I can based off of my experience.

-Your son does not understand the implications of what is going on. They have a very limited understanding of object permanence, so in some ways he may not know you. -if he does it is possible that it really fucks him up because he doesn’t necessarily understand why he sees daddy but daddy isn’t there. -DO NOT give up! I know it’s hard. I know it hurts. Please please please do not stop with the video conferences. Write down every time you ask. Write down every time she denies or acquiesces. Write down every time she doesn’t respond. This is VERY important for the future. -talk every chance you can. You have the horrific task of building a relationship through Skype/FT for now. If he wants to talk for 30 seconds, do it. If he wants to talk until she throws a fit and shuts down conversation or decides to distract him with gifts, food, candy, etc then do it. - keep requesting visitation, write down the time/date and denied/granted. Once it goes to court (and it sounds like it will have to go to court) you need to show this all and possibly have phone records/texts ready. - if you have nieces/nephews you need to have them over. You need to take care of them overnight. These slimy ass attorneys love to help these women keep the children from dad for periods of time like this and then in court they go “you can’t see your child over night, you haven’t taken care of them overnight for [insert time here].” You can shit on that little plan by being able to display that you can in-fact take care of a child. Similarly aged is better but anything is better than nothing. - if you need to talk or something, reach out and DM me dude. That shit almost killed me and I’m still looking for a way to help men in similar situations fight this shit. You aren’t alone and you don’t have to do this alone. I’m wishing you the best for you and your little man.

Lighthuro · 2022-09-13T11:21:52+00:00

Abandon them... You are hurting yourself.

You have billions sperms and trillions yet to come... Consider it a failled experiment.

Cookiedoughjunkie · 2022-09-13T21:29:54+00:00

it's very common in separation for one parental unit to lie to try manipulating a child into hating the other, if not both parents.

Sininenn · 2022-09-13T22:09:04+00:00

Crying can also be an expression of emotional release.

It might be that he was missing you and is crying because he finally gets to be with you.

Title	My son cries when I called him
Author	Pinytenis666
Upvotes	238
Comments	60
Date	September 13, 2022 1:25 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/xcu5zl/my_son_cries_when_i_called_him/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/my-son-cries-when-i-called-him.1131228 https://theredarchive.com/post/1131228

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