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If I have to earn all the money, pay all the bills, and do all the housework...WHY the fuck would I keep her around?

ThrowAway29307845034

December 12, 2022
221 upvotes
/r/AntiFeminists
https://www.psypost.org/2022/12/when-women-do-more-household-labor-they-see-their-partner-as-a-dependent-and-sexual-desire-dwindles-64497
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Title If I have to earn all the money, pay all the bills, and do all the housework...WHY the fuck would I keep her around?
Author

ThrowAway29307845034

Upvotes 221
Comments 77
Date December 12, 2022 3:06 PM UTC
(3 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/AntiFeminists
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/antifeminists/comments/zk1jps/if_i_have_to_earn_all_the_money_pay_all_the_bills/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/AntiFeminists/if-i-have-to-earn-all-the-money-pay-all-the-bills.1144142
https://theredarchive.com/post/1144142
Red Pill terms in post
feminism
Top posts by ThrowAway29307845034

If I have to earn all the money, pay all the bills, and do all the housework...WHY the fuck would I keep her around?

559 upvotes
December 12, 2022
/r/MensRights

Forced To Raise

0 upvotes
November 8, 2022
/r/MensRights

Comments

[–]Jakeybaby125[M] [score hidden] 3 years ago stickied comment (1 child) | Copy Link

OK, I'd like to know who the fuck reported this as 'It's targeted harassment at me'. You can contact me via Modmail. I won't leak it

[–]lonewolf86254 97 points98 points99 points 3 years ago (46 children) | Copy Link

“the perception that the labor division is unfair” this is the main problem, she can “ feel” it’s unfair & that’s that, no more peace. Most common reason for divorce is “ I’m not happy “ a study from the UK found that 1/3 of the divorced women who took part responded that they regret their divorce. Feelings over facts

[–]machismo_eels 76 points77 points78 points 3 years ago (45 children) | Copy Link

When a woman leaves her husband it’s because he refuses to change who he is. When a man leaves his wife it’s because she’s not the woman that he married.

[–]Relativity_Star10538 48 points49 points50 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

As soon as I married my ex-wife, the mask instantly came off and her personality was so different that I joked about her being replaced with an alien pod on our honeymoon like in Invasion of the Body Snatchers. It didn't stay funny for long.

I dated her for over two years. I still can't believe how long and how effectively she kept up that ruse.

[–]SamLBronkowitz2020 22 points23 points24 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

100x this.

[–]neosharkey 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

I’vs started referring to my wife’s irrationally angry personality as “Other Jane” when talking with her (usually when she is apologizing because she wants to buy something)

Guess I’m lucky she doesn’t watch Archer, because she has personality flips as big as Barry and Other Barry.

/edited because I can’t differentiate between Barry and Gary Goodspeed.

[–]Mantis_Toboggan_PCP 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

It’s. It’s Barry.

[–]neosharkey 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks, I think I confused the names because I’m currently watching Final Space.

[–]Mountain_Hawk40 8 points9 points10 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

That's deep🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[+]Willy7228 -17 points-16 points-15 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

For a 6 years old ?

[–]aquarionboi 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

For someone who has common sense.

[+]pample_meese -6 points-5 points-4 points 3 years ago (34 children) | Copy Link

Marriage and household take a lot more responsibility than unmarried, younger life does. If someone doesn’t change to keep up with those demands, that’s an issue :)

Haha no 39 YO with a car, home, spouse, children and career can act like a 22 YO without all those things. Laughable to imply one can.

[–]machismo_eels 11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (33 children) | Copy Link

I completely agree, but that’s also not at all the kind of thing I’m referring to. Men generally don’t hide aspects of their personality from their partners - what you see is what you get. IME, women are much more likely to conceal aspects of their personality out of fear they’ll scare off a potential mate. My own wife hid the fact that she had seriously bad anxiety and OCD until after we were married. And I also discovered that she had a habit of attempting to resolve differences of opinion with yelling and screaming. All things that never came to the surface in the years we were dating, and brought us to the brink of divorce a couple times. She was a completely different person immediately after we got married.

This is a common experience among my married guy friends. I absolutely think people should grow and change together as married couples, but you should be up front about exactly who you are before you get married. After 15 years of marriage and two kids I have grown positively in many ways, so in that sense I have changed. I get that this isn’t true for some guys and that’s on them. But trying to force your partner to be a different person is a lose-lose situation. It’s much more often women trying to “fix” their male partners than the other way around.

[–]neosharkey 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This. My wife will behave normally in public, but engage shrew mode at home.

Marriage really should be a contract that you can renew or not every five years.

And the OCD thing is tough, mine has it and refuses to take her Zoloft :(

[–]Dry_Dimension_4707 -3 points-2 points-1 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I showed my bf exactly who I am. He decided not to marry me. 🤣 But one day, a prince who enjoys being around an obnoxious asshole with the sense of humor of a 13 year old will come. 😃

[+]pample_meese -9 points-8 points-7 points 3 years ago (30 children) | Copy Link

“It feels like she hid this side from me and my friends say this about their wives, too” really isn’t data to make hateful assumptions off of.

What is is the data-backed wage gap combined with the uneven split of household duties

[–]lonewolf86254 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

Why did you edit his post “ It feels like “ men are very direct with their speech. He was very clear about his experience and from his Circle. The problem with the reported wage gap comes from studies that report on annual/ monthly earnings. They don’t present hours worked among the participants or a breakdown by field and jobs in the same industry. I am yet to see two neuro surgeons working the exact same hours and at the exact same hospital being paid differently because one is a woman. If it’s sports don’t even try that argument, the us women soccer team are actually being paid more than the men. Female models earn more than their male counterparts and nobody protests because it’s based on market forces, there’s more demand for female models.

[–]ModPiracy_Fantoski 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

The US women soccer team was proposed to be paid the same way the men team is. They refused because that would have lowered their pay by a lot.

[–]lonewolf86254 -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

There you go with those pesky patriarchy facts that can be fact checked 😂. Also the president of US women soccer is a woman soooooo….

[+]pample_meese -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Does what the courts decided in the end make you upset?

[–]ModPiracy_Fantoski 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

... Courts weren't involved in the final decisions...

[–]_name_of_the_user_ 4 points5 points6 points 3 years ago (24 children) | Copy Link

A myth. There is no wage gap, that's illegal. There is a small earnings gap when taking averages but when you drill down into hours worked, productivity, willingness to commute, etc., etc., etc., there is no overall earnings gap. Though, due to the number of women versus men graduating university single women in their thirty living in cities make (last I checked) 9% more than the male counterparts.

And the only study I've seen on household chores that actually includes the stereotypical male chores as well as hours worked at employment & commute showed that men an average an hour more per day working. But even that didn't take into account stress. In the end couples come to an agreement on the division of labour. If they don't agree they need to communicate. Acting like men are all lazy and women are all too inept to communicate with their husband is pretty damn sexist.

[+]pample_meese -5 points-4 points-3 points 3 years ago (23 children) | Copy Link

There are more studies proving the topics I’m discussing than the one you’re assuming.

[–]_name_of_the_user_ 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link

Yes there are a plethora of biased studies.

[+]pample_meese -2 points-1 points0 points 3 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link

So science isn’t real when you don’t like it?

And yet there’s not even a single study out there for what you’re arguing is there, even though science is made up. Yours is just that ridiculous?

[–]_name_of_the_user_ 2 points3 points4 points 3 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

Science is real. Research, though, can be heavily biased and every study I've seen that shows what you're saying has been heavily biased.

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/233717660_Thirty_Years_of_Denying_the_Evidence_on_Gender_Symmetry_in_Partner_Violence_Implications_for_Prevention_and_Treatment

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cb4YbJQ9mXs

[+]Epiphanic_Eros -11 points-10 points-9 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

American men often behave like spoiled children until long after the time has come to grow up.

[–]ModPiracy_Fantoski 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Westernized men. The whole western population is going to shit.

[–][deleted] 66 points67 points68 points 3 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

I can't understand the narrative as to why women think men have to do their part AND be the breadwinner. That literally makes you a useless individual, not just to your partner but to everyone else including themselves.

[–]jyORKb 38 points39 points40 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

They’re defeating their own “equality” argument by even proposing dynamics like this.

[–]ThrowAway29307845034[S] 52 points53 points54 points 3 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

It's the reproduction. They think JUST THE CAPACITY to fart out a womb turd entitles them to be coddled and supported by her preferred male. It's INSANE!!

[–]aknabi 15 points16 points17 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup… they think it makes them a “goddess”… need to keep reminding them that rats and cockroaches have babies…

[–]EvidencePlz 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well said LOL

[–]onlyidiotsgoonreddit 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This is why I have been banned from all the mainstream relationship subs. Every other post is like this. A middle aged woman complains that her husband doesn't do as much housework as her, throwing him under the bus, while other women chime in, saying he's a loser. Then when I politely ask, something like, "If I understand your post correctly, you've been out of the workforce your entire life, and you're 35?" the hags on there to apeshit.

[–]8copiesofbeemovie 12 points13 points14 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Did it say somewhere in the article that the women interviewed were SAHM/at-home wives? If that’s the case, it certainly would be unfair

[–]_name_of_the_user_ 10 points11 points12 points 3 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

Because being a mother is the hardest job in the world. Can't you see, getting the kids ready to go to school, packing their lunches and then doing a load of dishes in the 7 hours the kids are gone is the hardest job ever. Way worse than driving a truck for 12 hours straight, or slooping tar around a road in sweltering heat, or working the oil fields in northern Alberta for three weeks straight of 12 hour days...

Oh yeah, I forgot the eMoTiOnAl LaBoUr. FML. Like men don't also have stress in their lives.

[+][deleted] -4 points-3 points-2 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

You have clearly never cared for a child. Or a teenager, for that matter. On top of working. And cooking 90% of the meals. While also doing chores. And groceries. Fml.

[–]_name_of_the_user_ 1 point2 points3 points 3 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol, that's exactly what I'm doing. Although I do 85% of the cooking, she does one meal a week. Our division of labour is something we discuss frequently to make sure each other feels cared for and that it's an even split.

Edit, I just looked at your post history, you're 17-18 years old. Honey, why don't you sit this one out. The adults are talking right now.

[+][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

The thing is that women literally also work. In 30% of tje households women are the sole bread winners. In the USA, 51% of the workforce is literally women. A lot of them are also co-bread winners. The truth it that you can't raise a family on one income over 70% of the time. I understand that you can't expect someone to also work and do your chores, but this is what you expect from women, aside from child care. Don't you think it's split unfairly?

[+][deleted] 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]Dry_Dimension_4707 9 points10 points11 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Interesting that there was no demarcation of women who work and women who don’t. A stay at home mom, yes, I would expect she should take care of the household responsibilities. If both work, it’s stickier. Both parties need to contribute unless one works less hours. Then that one could take on more.

[–]Pavi2 27 points28 points29 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Fucking facts. Stay single fellas.

[–]ijustdontcare74 52 points53 points54 points 3 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

Not a single man I know in a relationship doesn’t do his fair share. Not a single one. In fact they do far more than their partners. This is yet another example of using sex as a weapon. Do the “honey do” list or you’re an abusive freeloading barstard, oh and don’t forget to pay all the bills too!!

[–]Ok-Crab-4063 24 points25 points26 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Step dad worked a full-time job and then still split the house chores with my mom 50/50

[–]ThrowAway29307845034[S] 22 points23 points24 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

PREECH IT!!

[+]twistednormz -31 points-30 points-29 points 3 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Wow that's amazing, I know many men who don't do their fair share. I know some women who don't do their fair share too though. I think the issue is that household chores were always seen as women's work, but now that most women work in paid jobs it's unfair when her male partner still considers it as the woman's work. I believe that's what the article is addressing. If both the man and the woman are working full time jobs it's unfair that the woman has to do all the housework also, just because it was the case traditionally.

[–]PactScharp 19 points20 points21 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Ah yes... "many" men are lazy but only "some" women are. It's really quite amazing how your true beliefs manage to creep through your passive aggressive comments. You think men are lazy and women are overburdened.

The fact of the matter is that you don't know a single man who "doesn't do his fair share" because you are not in a position to judge whether or not that's the case. Do you live with all these "men who are lazy"? Of course not, you just believe that men in general are lazy because that's what your man-hating cult expects you to believe.

Luckily we have statistics on the matter... and while women love to point out that they do indeed still perform more domestic work, they also LOVE to ignore that they don't work NEARLY as many hours in the workplace. So this whole "women are now also working full time" argument is nothing more than a bad joke.

https://journalistsresource.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Modern-Parenthood-1-Pew-Res.jpg

Furthermore, the idea that domestic work & paid work can in any way be compared is fucking ludicrous. As if doing the laundry while watching a movie is even remotely as stressful as making sure a building doesn't collapse.

Studies have also shown that women work slower & are less easily pleased when it comes to domestic work, so simply citing "more hours worked in the home by women" is not the be all end all argument.

In the end, when you add up ALL kinds of work, MEN are the ones working MORE. So you can take your pathetic anti-male lies elsewhere. Because you are fooling no one but yourself.

[–]lonewolf86254 20 points21 points22 points 3 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

Ever notice how men are always expected to do their roles, protection & provision unconditionally but women usually have conditions. I’ll cook fro him if he washes the dishes but a man can’t say I’ll only protect you during the work week. Ontop of that women are very whimsical, “ I feel he is not doing his share “ what if a guy said “ I feel I’ve protected you from the last three cat callers take the next two” Considering how convenient life has become, all you need is some good planning and you’re able to get a handle on household tasks. You can literally load the dishwasher & washing machine then mop the floor. Jeez women in the 1920 would have killed for such a life.

[–]PactScharp 16 points17 points18 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly. These women don't give a fuck. They feel entitled to what men have always traditionally provided. Men "should" work full time AND do 50% of the domestic work. If they don't do that, they're disgusting losers who should kill themselves and rot in hell... because male privilege or something.

But isn't it just so unfair that women are now expected to work too? Oh no! They also still have to clean the house! SUCH OPPRESSION!

I'm more than happy to split the domestic work 50/50 but this constant narrative that men are lazy losers who basically do nothing while women do all the work is so moronic. Statistically men work MORE than women. I'm completely fine with that but ffs, these women seriously need to stop bitching when they have it "better".

[–]ThrowAway29307845034[S] 24 points25 points26 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Way to miss the point in your wilful ignorance, misandrist. Your post history is just you whatabouting in this sub. Get out.

[–]EvidencePlz 10 points11 points12 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

But that's not how it works. The choreplay myth has been busted and beaten to death. Go visit r / deadbedrooms for example. Plenty of men reported doing all the household chores but their wives are still not interested in sex. They won't even pretend to be interested in sex or provide pity sex to please these men. On the contrary, my last girlfriend was more than willing to engage in sexual activities literally anytime I wanted and I never had to do anything for her. Although it took me two weeks to find out that what she was asking for in return were marriage and kids. So as you can see, most women nowadays are simply following feminists' advice to weaponize and use sex for certain benefits wheras we men love and want sex just for the sake of sex. When I rent an escort i don't care if she has a phd in maths or a successful business. I don't care if she's a successful business owner. We men don't care if our female partner is doing chores at all. As a single man in my 40s who has done all my household chores all my life, I don't care if a woman living together with me does any of it. I just want loyalty and access to her pussy, ass and mouth whenever I want but apparently that's too tough even if I pay all the bills and all the cooking and cleaning. This is why number of MGTOW "pump and dump" men like me are rising, prostitutes online and offline are making six figures and pro-feminist single mother women are asking: "where are all the good men?".

[–]_name_of_the_user_ 3 points4 points5 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I think the issue is that household chores were always seen as women's work, but now that most women work in paid jobs it's unfair when her male partner still considers it as the woman's work.

The ridiculous part of this is that it gets fuck tons of media attention to the point that most people believe it's true. But what doesn't get media attention? Think for a second. What about this topic doesn't get media attention? Men's work. Traditional/stereotypical men work doesn't get mentioned in any of these studies, articles, blog posts, social media complaints, etc. Do you think the lawn mowes itself? What about fixing the car, repairing the house, all of those renos, landscaping, sports with kids, etc. etc. Men are doing their fair share. They always have. Just because women have it hard doesn't mean men don't. To think men have it easy is exceedingly arrogant and self centered.

[+][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Most men i know certainly don't do their fair share of chores or child care as co bread winners. The study was not necessarily about sahm. So little women are sahm, because we literally can't afford that crap.

[+]Conscious-Charity915 -25 points-24 points-23 points 3 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Single men are not in relationships.

[–]ThrowAway29307845034[S] 25 points26 points27 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminists like you are stupid, and you just proved it. GTFO.

[–]peteypete78 21 points22 points23 points 3 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Did anyone see this posted in r science ?? man them comments were a shitshow.

[–]aknabi 10 points11 points12 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh anything rational or logical on this topic would get you banned in any other sub… I know from much experience.

[–]Naru4odo 14 points15 points16 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

For the intangible benefits of course, you know? Listening to your problems while on her phone, being supportive while destroying your dreams, taking care of the home while being too lazy to do so. You know, those intangibles...

[–]crippledhermit 8 points9 points10 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I tried doing that to keep my borderline ex happy.

Spoiler alert: she left anyway.

[–]Boccob81 9 points10 points11 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

These are the woman that don't understand why their man finds another woman to do lay with

[–]Pavi2 11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm good with house hold chores but she's getting on the roof with me. She's helping replace the floor, she's helping me hang sheetrock, she's helping replace the radiator. Equality for all.

[–]JustaTcup 8 points9 points10 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Whoever earns all the money and pays all the bills should NOT lift a finger around the house.

[–]neosharkey 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It gets better even with a bride from south of the border.

For twenty years I work outside the house, she’s a homemaker.

She’s started getting snippy about “being tired of just cleaning”

I’m tired of working every day too, but I don’t complain about it.

Don’t marry boys, don’t cohabitate. Date if you want, but be care to not get trapped. Even the that seem too good to be true are.

[–]Circ-Le-Jerk 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

How common is the traditional setup like this though? Today, 41% of mothers make more than the father in married households.

[+]Conscious-Charity915 -12 points-11 points-10 points 3 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Nothing kills sexual desire in women faster than resentment. Not sure what resentment does to sexual desire in men.

[–]jyORKb 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Not sure why you would think it’s any different for men.

[–]machismo_eels 12 points13 points14 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s the same.

[–]sgt_oddball_17 19 points20 points21 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

No one Studies that because society doesn't care about men.

[–]Ok-Crab-4063 4 points5 points6 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Depends if they know how to do that thing

[–]WhatScottWhatScott -33 points-32 points-31 points 3 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Why don’t men just hire a nanny? That’s what they all want anyway.

[–]31726951 points 3 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

Why can't women just ask their dads to pay all the bills? That's what they all want anyways.

[–]antifeminists-ModTeam[M] 0 points1 point2 points 3 years agolocked comment (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminism isn't synonymous with women. Criticize the ideology. Don't hate a gender.

[–]crippledhermit 6 points7 points8 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Have you polled every single male in existence? Are you sure that's what we want?

[–]lonewolf86254 11 points12 points13 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If a man is the main breadwinner and can hire a nanny or a house keeper, what does he get from a wife that he can’t get from an Independent contractor?

[–]ThrowAway29307845034[S] 13 points14 points15 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Get out, misandrist troll.

[–]JustaTcup 7 points8 points9 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Same could be asked in reverse. Why don't all women just get sugar daddies?

Seriously, don't you see how damn sexist your statement is??

What's so bad about doing some housework and cooking for a man who busts his nuts all damn day for you? Very, very few of us were born royalty you know.

Saws the legs off your high horse

[–]Former_Ocelot5593 0 points1 point2 points 3 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude. Men aren't robotic brick walls incapable of understanding things called feelings. Thats why! They want love and support to. How do you even type that out and think you're right??

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