I'm a Mens Rights Advocate, and I'm afraid of men.

ragingpineapple · 2013-07-24T01:32:58+00:00

If Zimmerman were a white female, they wouldn't be giving "her" nearly as much shit for having a gun, they wouldn't be "blaming" her for following him, and they would have applauded her for killing the big scary black man for attempting to rape her. And yes, they would have portrayed Trayvon as a man, not a child. Because the idea that men are big and violent, would have superseded even the racial circus that's inundated the case.

Our dimorphism is an underlying cause for a lot of what people would term "social constructs" about gender. The fact is, when a large man enters a room with you, you take notice. At a very basic level, you understand the commanding presence. It's even more true for most women, who will find that most men would have a distinct size advantage in a physical altercation. Realizing it isn't a problem. Labeling men as a whole as being dangerous because they're more physically capable of being so is a problem. And I think it's ingrained in you to acknowledge more physically dominant men.

Would you feel the same fear towards a man just as skinny and wimpy as yourself? I don't think the gay part matters, tbh.

Weapons can negate the size difference between the sexes. There's other ways to exert power and control over people than just physical dominance. That's what we're largely concerned with, here.

Hodor_Frey · 2013-07-24T00:50:07+00:00

There's a big difference between equality before the law and on the street. I'm fair complected and live in a very safe suburb. I'm average height and fat. And yet I'll still give wide berth to anyone coming up behind me or even if they're in front of me and they don't look like a jogger and doubly so if they're a young male. We're still human and some biases are appropriate. How far that goes is a matter for all of us.

giegerwasright · 2013-07-24T01:41:27+00:00

I'm a skinny, wimpy, gay male, and I live in nyc.

Move to Hell's Kitchen, the East Village, or even Astoria. Problem solved.

YetAnotherCommenter · 2013-07-24T03:39:56+00:00

If you're a skinny and wimpy gay male you probably have experiences with being beaten up and/or repeatedly bullied by other guys for not being "GAAAAAAR" enough, so I don't blame you for being scared.

Its night, you're walking home, you don't want to be a victim of violent crime (which may include sexual assault). Yes, it is technically irrational to assume women are not threats, but (and forgive me if I sound like I am stereotyping) it may be possible you are more socially comfortable with women and find it easier to relate to them (I know this isn't true of all gay men but it is true for many including some that I know). Familiarity breeds comfort.

And since men do in fact make up the majority of initiators of violent crime generally (this doesn't mean it is "inherent" to maleness but the empirical correlation is there), I can understand where you are coming from.

Precautions over walking home at night aren't, in my opinion, examples of gross bigotry or anything. Men's Rights supporters tend to be big critics of ideas like Schrodinger's Rapist but that's because it plays into a whole cultural meme complex fuelled partly by old stereotypes and partly by the feminist All-Men-Are-Rapists-At-Their-Core attitude etc... but that doesn't mean all women who avoid male strangers and walk home quickly at night are in fact bigoted or misandric - from the context of the information they have been provided, they're simply employing a risk management strategy.

I think what matters is your conscious convictions. Even if you're subconsciously still dealing with fears and issues which may not be entirely rational, that doesn't make you a bigot as long as in your dealings with individuals-you-know-as-people you do your best to follow your conscious convictions and rational judgments.

Captaincastle · 2013-07-24T00:48:32+00:00

Why is safety consciousness, prejudice? As a female, if I am passed on the street by a man of any color, I hold onto my purse tighter. This isn't prejudice, it's preparedness. I am also conscious of parking garages, alleys, elevators, and being followed home at night. I don't feel paranoid, and I'm not 'afraid'; I'm just careful of my surroundings. Smart is what keeps you from being a victim.

What SOME people try to tell us, is that its being a bigot to be safety aware, and while we're at it, we should only fear white males because they might rape us, and we shouldn't have any problems walking alone because it's all men's responsibility not to give us unwanted sexual attention. (putting you and me both in that position, gaybro.) Well that's, as my granny used to say...hogwash. For every potential criminal, there has to be a potential victim. I have a LOT of control over if I become a victim or not, and I trust myself with my safety FAR more than I trust 6.99 billion other people I don't know. Of COURSE you are more conscious of your limitations around people bigger than you. It's not prejudice, it's science and survival...darwinism..evolution. You're not prejudiced...you're smart...and thousands of years of ancestors evolving gave you that instinct to steer around potential problems that you see ahead..just like that instinctual swerve around a deep pothole you don't want to drive over.

ttnorac · 2013-07-26T03:17:00+00:00

Just remember you can't flim flam the ZimZam.

_Qwyjibo_ · 2013-07-24T03:08:19+00:00

Lets not forget a day or so ago, Zimmerman saved four people from an overturned vehicle. So..... There's that.

avantvernacular · 2013-07-24T01:59:01+00:00

You should be a afraid of women. If you run into a man, he can use force and take away what you have with you on that day. If you run into a woman, she can call the police or a lawyer and rob you of your future.

ThePigman · 2013-07-24T01:42:49+00:00

Well, of course you should be more afraid of men -- men are twice as strong as women so if a male person gets violent you are in more trouble than if a female person gets violent. Unless you are scared of male midgets this is not an issue.

2013-07-24T05:10:16+00:00

Do you drive a car? If so you are much more likely to be hurt in your car than on the street.

Funcuz · 2013-07-24T06:09:49+00:00

I don't see anything "wrong" with having a natural fear of people. I mean , I don't care how many times somebody tells me that their 150 pound Rottweiler is just a big baby , I still don't want to leave a baby in the room alone with it. They're probably right that there's nothing to worry about but I don't and can't know what's going through that dog's mind and no alarm is going to go off telling me that the dog thinks the baby is a new chew toy.

It's not prejudiced to have a fear of people who can hurt you. I think it's unreasonable to assume that every man you see at night wants to hurt you but part of your fear stems from the fact that you feel defenseless should something happen. Get some self-defense training or hit the gym. That should , at the very least , make you more confident and less fearful. I'm 200 lbs and go to the gym regularly so have quite a bit of muscle. That doesn't mean I have nothing to fear , just that people are as likely to assume I'm the bad guy as opposed to the other way around. This helps you sort out who to watch and who not to watch.

2013-07-24T13:38:12+00:00

Work out and learn how to fight and that feeling goes away.

DavidByron · 2013-07-24T17:25:59+00:00

Black people often have the same issue. Yes I think most of us have that same issue. You're a product of a sexist society, as are we all. In fact not only are you probably unconsciously sexist against men a lot, you probably unconsciously apply that to yourself in many ways you're not even aware of. That is what it means to be reared in a sexist society.

2013-07-24T02:50:04+00:00

I fear women to a degree. Not physically, but emotionally and maybe culturally. I would prefer to get my teeth knocked out than suffer some of the abuse I have (or have seen)at the hands of females. I think it's because I've never seen remorse. I've met men who will tell you straight up that they fucked-up a relationship, I don't know any women that have shown that level of self-reflection. I'm sure they exist, just not in my frame of reference. Perhaps they admit it to each other.

With regard to physical fears; We all have situational awareness. I'm a good sized man, 6' 190lbs. and I watch my back. Size really means nothing. I've taught Hapkido for a while and I will tell you that size and strength is no match for skill and will. You should take some self defense type courses. Avoid arts with forms, Tae kwon do, Karate, etc. They are OK, but you want to disable and get gone.

MFW 80% of my students are female, but I'm a misogynist. I've also taught most of my female family members to handle firearms.

typhonblue · 2013-07-24T04:11:41+00:00

If another man attacks you, other people are more likely to come to your aid.

If a woman attacks you, other people are more likely to assist her in beating you.

Which one is more dangerous?

rightsbot · 2013-07-24T00:26:16+00:00

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Pecanpig · 2013-07-24T01:55:35+00:00

Everyone is bias, my bias happens to go the other way sometimes.

Bohica69 · 2013-07-24T01:06:31+00:00

Don't care.

Title	I'm a Mens Rights Advocate, and I'm afraid of men.
Author	RedFlagDiver
Upvotes	2
Comments	38
Date	July 24, 2013 12:25 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1ix7vd/im_a_mens_rights_advocate_and_im_afraid_of_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/im-a-mens-rights-advocate-and-im-afraid-of-men.1168081 https://theredarchive.com/post/1168081

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