I grew a spine today

mikesteane · 2017-10-17T23:32:43+00:00

cue me saying I love women, have a GF

Feeling the need to say this is a problem.

Damjo · 2017-10-18T00:54:33+00:00

She then said I was mostly right but feminism "needs reclaimed from the misandrists."

I'd say she's spot on, there. I believe it should go either of two ways:

1) Feminism can pursue women's issues and support/consent to MRAs doing the same for men, with more collaborative efforts between the two on issues affecting both parties; or,

2) Feminism can purge itself of the misandry within its ranks and tackle both mens' and womens' issues altogether. I'd rather the label changed under this option from "feminist" to something that better reflects an all-inclusive approach for equality.

I cannot take seriously someone who calls themselves a feminist and claims to fight for equal rights but acts arguably misandrous.

psy_raven · 2017-10-18T00:52:38+00:00

Nice job. Although no one spoke up for you, you can bet there were plenty of people in the room who agreed with you. Next time, they will feel more confident speaking their mind because of your actions. You did good☺️

theothermod · 2017-10-17T23:42:51+00:00

Good on you for being brave and speaking up!

Nion_zaNari · 2017-10-18T02:12:45+00:00

She then said I was mostly right but feminism "needs reclaimed from the misandrists."

You should ask her why defending the label of "feminism" is a bigger priority to her than speaking out against said misandrists.

angels_fan · 2017-10-18T17:06:19+00:00

I'm so fucking sick of the "feminism is just equality" bullshit tag line.

It's akin to saying "communism is just about sharing! You're not against sharing, are you??"

zulu127 · 2017-10-18T02:34:18+00:00

(Wu?)

Zoe Quinn

That's great to hear...you've taken the most difficult step on your journey...the first one.

DarkKnight77 · 2017-10-18T05:16:04+00:00

Proud of you friend. Stinks that it is uncomfortable to stand up for things like this, but you did extremely well

GreasedLightning · 2017-10-18T10:11:44+00:00

Some more big ones are divorce, workplace deaths, suicide rates, and conscription. If you haven't yet, read through the Reference book on the side bar. Most of it's citations, so the meat is easy to get through.

1up_for_life · 2017-10-18T12:04:24+00:00

People are generally much more reasonable in person than they are on the internet. We could all benefit from more face to face discussions.

2017-10-18T14:20:03+00:00

"needs reclaimed from the misandrists."

I hate to break this to her: Its not going to happen. She could be the most rational feminist (or person) to ever walk the earth. She could be 100% correct in everything she thinks, it could all be 100% true. I say this because honestly I hope they do. A return to reality/reason for them would be good.

Now lets look at large marge: Shes 240 pounds over weight, has 67 tattoos, has been on antidepressants for the last 6 years, thinks that men are literally holding her down. Marge isn't afraid of getting violent if someone disagrees with her. Marge is a transgender half wolf from the realm of the fey, and dyes her hair. Also she thinks you can spend money and 'fight the system.'

Is Marge the problem? Nope. Not in the least. Anyone can look at marge and say "Shes out of her mind." The problem is there is a group of feminists who are rational in all areas but one. They are totally sane in all areas but one. They get irrationally angry, virtue signal constantly about that one thing. Shout down everyone who isn't on their side 150%. These feminists get way to outraged about their one subject and make it feel like 'its every feminist.' By and large this empowers women like marge to really cause problems.

Then you have what I noticed in a friend of mine 5 years ago or so: In her defense before I start she came from a strict Mormon household, and arguably a patriarchy really did exist in her church/house. Shes just one off from sanity on everything. She literally blamed her dad for being 'a part of the patriarchy' despite him being the one that deliberately got his family away from the church they went to that was most of the problem (as according to her.) So how is he 'patriarchy confirmed'?

She thinks that men actively only think about power, and controlling women. That US law is bent subtly against women. That society is bent subtly against women. When I questioned what she meant by "against" she said "to hold down." Problem is she denies figures that show women empowered in any way at all (E.G. Women graduating at hire rates in college.) she will deny, deny, deny.

She goes on tangents about how 'people don't understand the language of feminism' and 'its not her job to educate them' lastly 'everything is a feminist problem' (Despite her being a teacher, rather ironically.) We all know the problem with both those statements:

Humans are good with language and their language isn't technical like a scientists. So this doesn't apply at all. It takes seconds to describe what they mean. They use language as a veil to prevent people from actually knowing what they mean. Like saying "I didn't kill him. I non-murdered him." non-murder being defined as "When an action known to be fatal, doesn't place blame on the person who directly caused the chain of events." Its all Orwell's nightmare.
It is your job to defend what you think and believe. Get over it. You aren't above criticism.
Anything so broad to cover/explain everything, has no meaning, and no utility. This isn't physics, anytime a TOE is presented its (usually) disproved in about 50 years because thats how the science advances. So unless they are creating their feminist TOE to overcome feminism that isn't really the case.

She will defend Marge for no other reason than Marge is a woman. She will use any language to say that Marge is being oppressed because she believes that. She will say you are the oppressor no matter how hard Marge beats you, because Marge deserves to beat you, as you could be a potential rapist or Nazi. Ect.

ITS THOSE PEOPLE that are the problem with feminism. They always compromise with their beliefs with their in group, and refuse to compromise with the out groups. The problem is all you start to do is piss the out groups off until they gang up on you, and your in group gets dumber and weaker.

Its also that they think they have the solution to everything in life, and usually that thing is using violence to stop the 'bad people' from being bad. Problem is they don't. Ask any feminist Econ questions: "If we want to give every patient the cure to cancer how many lives would that take? As in how many people would die, not from surgery, but from making the materials needed to save the lives?" Every feminist actively denies that this is a thing (so do communists) problem is: WE KNOW IT IS. There are literal equations on how many people die with a given set of regulations. And feminism cannot fix that problem without saying "we shouldn't cure cancer."

For clarity: I myself have taken anti-depressants, and it really fucked with the way I thought. I'm not saying anti-depressants aren't a solution to depression, they cured me. But like any treatment (from aspirin to surgery) it has its effects on you.

DarkDoesThings · 2017-10-18T04:10:12+00:00

My entire school low-key knows that I am an MRA and exactly who is, but the students at my school are about 60% conservative, which is crazy because I live in one of the most liberal towns in america.

ThatPerthFan · 2017-10-18T04:32:55+00:00

Mate I got bashed for doing what you did, so good on you. I don’t call this growing a spine, I call this doing the incredibly honourable thing of standing up for yourself and what you believe in.

Keep doing what you’re doing, you’re a fucking legend

ThirdTurnip · 2017-10-18T10:15:43+00:00

I just told her that if the best feminism sends to the UN is emma watson, sarkesian and that one other girl (Wu?) then it needs new figureheads. I told her even she would be a better spokesperson because she recognized that men aren't these dominating forces of nature that never are venerable, that men can be raped, and sexually assaulted.

I wouldn't try to defend everything she's said or done but Emma Watson is actually an excellent figurehead for this.

One of her first post Harry Potter films was The Perks of Being a Wallflower which - spoiler alert - raises the ugly spectre of female-on-male child sexual abuse.

We could safely say that her name in the credits would have resulted in many more people seeing this rather good film.

CuboidSphere · 2017-10-18T14:06:38+00:00

This is an excellent way to spark discussion and start the process of bringing real change. A great deal of time is spent preaching to the choir, but actually bringing the discussion to others outside of the MRA circle is awesome.

Blutarg · 2017-10-18T14:55:34+00:00

Good job dude :)

Aeternalis_ · 2017-10-18T17:17:53+00:00

How can you reclaim feminism from misandrists when the entire ideology is based off of the of elimination of masculinity?

Title	I grew a spine today
Author	PowerToAnnihilate
Upvotes	108
Comments	36
Date	October 17, 2017 11:11 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/772gor/i_grew_a_spine_today/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-grew-a-spine-today.1174863 https://theredarchive.com/post/1174863

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