I don't understand how this connects to Toxic Masculinity...

AnotherDAM · 2019-02-09T19:49:16+00:00

Okay, so he's a weak willed man that never learned to stand up for himself and what he wants? That's toxic insecurity, regardless of gender.

I get teased for liking Prince and taking hair care seriously. But I do it anyways because my real friends don't mean what they're saying and my fake friends' opinions don't mean shit to me.

XavierMalory · 2019-02-09T20:40:03+00:00

So apparently peer pressure is now "toxic masculinity"?

Riiiiiiight... As if women never ever ever do this to each other.

Greg_W_Allan · 2019-02-09T19:57:28+00:00

Toxic masculinity is horseshit.

That said, there is a dominance paradigm inherent in male social groups, and it's largely determined by the individual where they fall on the dominance hierarchy. This is often expressed not by adherence to the group norms, but rather by the rejection of some aspect therein. So you will see a group of guys call their peers out on unexpected behaviors; it's the target's opportunity to show their level of independence of the group thus improving their social standing.

None of which is toxic, btw.

Oh, and women have their own version of this, but in my observations the relationship is inversed; the call out gives you a chance to conform or you have a chance to lose social standing. Deviations from the matriarch usually lower your standing within that social group.

Mind you; that's not toxic either. Both behaviors are just how it is.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2019-02-09T21:19:41+00:00

We've all seen women attacking men for liking childish things like games or cartoons.

Seems like you can't win.

deville66 · 2019-02-09T22:45:32+00:00

She's a fucking moron. He didn't genderize it. He juevenilized it! He was giving his friend shit for ordering a kid's drink. Hasn't she ever been ever been around men before? It's not like he's calling him a pussy for not double pumping his bass drum on a Whole Lotta Love cover.

Saprano44 · 2019-02-09T20:21:28+00:00

In what way did they gender hot chocolate by teasing their friend who ordered one?

Unless they explicitly said “you can’t order hot chocolate because that’s a girls drink” they didn’t assign any gender to the drink.

Ruben_Samich · 2019-02-09T22:10:04+00:00

It annoys me how women don't understand male friendship. I can't really blame them, but it still annoys me.

We tease each other all the time. But it's all in good fun. I guarantee you none of those guys actually gave a fuck about what that dude ordered.

2019-02-09T22:51:03+00:00

Toxic masculinity might be a thing, but these people are blaming it for pretty much everything that is wrong in the world, which is ridiculous. Also, I am of the opinion that toxic femininity exists too, but the concept is ignored.

Meyright2 · 2019-02-10T10:21:41+00:00

I am a feminine man. I never liked teasing my friends or my friends teasing me. I always preferred to be just kind and understand of my friends problems and always be the one to listen to their problems.

But the older I got the more and more I noticed that this teasing actually had a purpose in everyday life for men and that I am lacking it. It's a way to toughen up to be prepared for the hard realities life throws at you, so that when your superior says something harsh you don't break down, or when a women you're trying to flirt with shit tests you don't give up.

I am a man who is, how feminists would describe it, not toxic and in touch with his feminine side. And it has gotten me nowhere, it is all a lie. I am going my way because I at least have a high self esteem though and don't care what other people think. Teasing your friends serves a purpose, especially for men. Like ruff playing in a young age. It prepares you for the real world and the challenges waiting for you. As long as it is happening in good faith and not in a "mobbing" way, it's all good. Those feminists have no idea about masculinity. Fuck them

alclarkey · 2019-02-10T00:39:49+00:00

That's that individual guy's fault if he can't handle a little ribbing from other guys. Hot chocolate is delicious, and anyone who doesn't like it can eat a dick is what I would have said to them.

2019-02-10T10:41:51+00:00

I get a bit tired of women gatekeeping masculinity. What would she know about being a man?

tenchineuro · 2019-02-09T20:49:45+00:00

He shoulda ordered a Mocha, he gets the chocolate and twice the caffeine!

IDprefertostayanon · 2019-02-10T06:00:49+00:00

What is wrong with people here who trying to support idiots who mocked the guy for ordering what he likes? How is it a good fun? Why blame HIM? AHAHA NOT A REAL MAN CAN NOT STAND UP FOR HIMSELF AHAHA MAN UP!
And don't forget that only ones who are teased for liking things are men - nobody'd ever say a word if a woman ordered hot chocolate.
TM is bullshit but in this case she pointed out absolutely legit issue.
You guys are ready to justify any kind of shit just because a feminist said it's toxic masculinity.

Gimpy1405 · 2019-02-09T22:16:45+00:00

Time to order a Shirley Temple drink.

2019-02-10T00:34:01+00:00

I get hot chocolate because I hate coffee. Is me not wanting to drink coffee if a woman asks if I want some also toxic masculinity since that terms apparently means anything?

boringcarpets · 2019-02-10T11:41:05+00:00

What's funny about this is it never happened and she has gendered hot chocolate. She's probably noticed more women in general have hot chocolate, maybe she doesn't like coffee, and has decided it must be toxic masculinity

DJ-Roukan · 2019-02-10T14:13:05+00:00

First of all, if a feminist is saying it, it's a lie.

Second, try to get a woman to pay for a date, open your door, pull out a chair.

The problem with people like her is that the only thing more powerful than her hate for men is her glaring lack of intelligence.

Rockbottom503 · 2019-02-11T16:45:33+00:00

Fucks sake..... Banter does not sit well with any SJW at all! Ribbing and well meaning piss takes over inane shit is how we get through the day.

pandathatlikesanime · 2019-02-11T16:58:46+00:00

Straight up he’s taking shit personally and that’s his fault not his friends faults

2019-02-09T20:04:40+00:00

Women are way way way more "toxic". Men are up front about everything for starters and we know how to joke around and be funny! Women mock women behind their backs until they develope eating disorders and shit

Title	I don't understand how this connects to Toxic Masculinity...
Author	anshalm
Upvotes	129
Comments	39
Date	February 9, 2019 7:39 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/aovrpq/i_dont_understand_how_this_connects_to_toxic/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-dont-understand-how-this-connects-to-toxic.1181779 https://theredarchive.com/post/1181779

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