What would you demand from ex for extra kid time?

CrazySanta7 · 2023-11-07T19:22:23+00:00

You can demand all you want. Do you think her attorney/judge is going to agree to this? Am i reading this correct....you can take kids any/every holiday? Who's going to enforce a kid getting a phone at 13? I had the same stance initially but got kids' phones at 12 because i was tired of calling ex's phone to talk to them. You'll be likely fighting kids more on the phone/social media items.

Other than that, i put on that she could not move out of school district until kids were 18. Im not driving for hours to exchange kids. Put in something about shared expenses on kids medical, activities, etc. Obviously, put in 50/50 schedule. I get them 7 days. You get them 7 days. You get this Christmas, i get next Christmas. Where will kid pick up/drop off occur? What time? Can her new boyfriend do it? Hell no.

Lastly....whose insurance will kids be covered on? If yours make sure she pays half.

Plebe-Uchiha · 2023-11-07T19:43:24+00:00

Be smart. Don’t be emotional. Lawyer up. Do your due diligence and research. Let your ego go. Focus on your kids.

Again, be smart, don’t be emotional.

Imagine what the judge will think if he has one parent who thinks they should have ALL the holidays, ALL the summers, can travel wherever but the other parent needs approval? Making all these “demands” with the reason is,

“She’s a bitch your honor.”

It’s not going to go well. If you have substantial evidence that she is incapable of spending time with the kids during summers or during the holidays, fair, but if it’s JUST BECAUSE, that’s weak.

Be smart. Don’t be emotional. Let your ego go. Focus on the kids.

[+]

TheSamurabbi · 2023-11-07T18:21:52+00:00

Power over medical decisions unless you are unreachable or incapacitated

Which_Emergency_2413 · 2023-11-07T18:14:32+00:00

And what I mean by first refusal is I could take the kids across the country for Christmas or whatever with my family whenever I’d like, they see her family daily. In the same way, I want total control of my sons dirtbike race schedule over her stupid summer shit, I will have to make sacrifices with work to do it, she’s a fucking school secretary and gets total ease in scheduling summer stuff with kids.

One_Cartographer_465 · 2023-11-07T19:16:27+00:00

make sure she can not move outside of contiguous counties. Or at least limit distance she could move the kids.

Also make sure you have all rights to decisions for school and reports.

whiskey_piker · 2023-11-07T22:38:05+00:00

Sole legal custody.

jkw118 · 2023-11-07T22:41:59+00:00

So as others have suggested, get a lawyer. But if you get her to agree to things first. Then go to a lawyer with it, and be like what else do I need to add here.

So the smart phone (I give my kids a phone when they hit middle school (12) as that's when all the after school programs and stuff start to happen in my area. And that way they can get ahold of me (my ex is a bit of a deadbeat. )

So for me, I have every 4th of july (it's a special holiday for my family, we're weird) - The kids are also primarily with me, so they spend xmas night at their home. and go to the ex's by lunch time.

I'd see about setting something up so you can take them to see your family every year, ie two weeks back to back (with the expectation that you'll be spending it near your family)

I had 2 weeks back to back for vacation, ex went to court. They took it away as she felt it was too much time away from her for the kids. (fyi the kids now hate that I have to bring them back a week before everyone else for vacation.) as my whole family usually goes to the beach for 2 weeks.

Also the court has to approve it as well, even if you both agree to it. If it's too one sided, without a valid reason (and cheating is not a valid reason, neither is money in the courts eyes)

Title	What would you demand from ex for extra kid time?
Author	Which_Emergency_2413
Upvotes	6
Comments	12
Date	November 7, 2023 6:06 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/17q0d2d/what_would_you_demand_from_ex_for_extra_kid_time/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/what-would-you-demand-from-ex-for-extra-kid-time.1237723 https://theredarchive.com/post/1237723

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