Having trouble pulling the trigger

Academic_Mistake_751 · 2024-01-28T04:18:02+00:00

My dude , I’m the king of procrastination and in 2015 She chested I think but no hard proof and left with my son and I put up with this shit, the pain Abd alimony in having to pay now makes me sick with regret that I didn’t do it in 2015. Do not be the simpy sucker I was it won’t get better you can’t Un -B her mine was nice until son was born got a bit crazy now is sooo entitled she thinks $10,000 a month alimony for 10 years is too low a offer .

slow-motion-pearls · 2024-01-27T20:23:41+00:00

Rofl idk why this post made me laugh

IllustriousCry672 · 2024-01-27T20:13:33+00:00

I don't know if Stockholm, but if it's a real mental illness, does she acknowledge it, and if so, any willingness to take medication and therapy for it?

Obviously, not sure about your situation, I'm not sure if the damage down is irreparable or anything.

As for why you can't leave....could just be standard fear of change. Things could be bad now, but at least you're used too it. Unknowns are always scary. I'm also sure you loved her at some point, and might still love her, despite her issues. It can be hard to let someone go when you love them.

SkeptiCynical · 2024-01-27T19:35:31+00:00

Pump the brakes a second here. Does she understand she has NPD and wants to change?

Dialectical Behavioral Therapy fixes personality disorders. I happen to work in a field close to psychiatrists and therapists who have a pretty good track record in curing people of depression and antisocial disorders. DBT is neither quick nor easy; this is months or years of dedication to the treatment. But it works.

This is a rare opportunity to leverage a trial separation - something I'll rarely recommend if your objective is to be divorced. Your separation agreement can be time-bound with clauses outlining your expectations and her responsibilities; e.g. medication and DBT.

According to the sidebar, this is not a pro-divorce sub. If you love your wife and you're still holding out hope that your marriage can be saved, hop on over to Google and find a dialectical behavioral therapist near you and find one that takes your insurance.

Edit: to the coward downvoting and reporting my comments, I'm the fucking moderator. I get the reports.

Lost-Barracuda-9680 · 2024-01-27T19:16:51+00:00

You're afraid to be alone. Unfortunately, I can relate but the inevitable filing will probably be done within a couple of months I'm thinking. Good luck to you.

darweter_DPI · 2024-01-27T16:49:08+00:00

Not Stockholm IMHO. Just afraid to jump into unknown. Future is brighter than what you have now though, so these fears are largely foundless.

Isthisthereddits · 2024-01-27T16:20:00+00:00

It's tough man I get it. Mine is the same and was for our 11 year relationship. My anxiety and depression melted away when we split. However, I also get weak moments. I'm close to the end and dreamt about her two nights in a row. I want her good side back as that was my love. I have to constantly remind myself of the bad. One day I may finally be rid of my broken feelings for my narcissistic emotional abuser.

Edit My therapist told me at meeting 3 I didn't need therapy and that I needed a lawyer. She offered to be there if I needed a session, but my focus needed to be on protecting myself.

Title	Having trouble pulling the trigger
Author	par4me20
Upvotes	14
Comments	15
Date	January 27, 2024 3:38 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1acdha0/having_trouble_pulling_the_trigger/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/having-trouble-pulling-the-trigger.1243927 https://theredarchive.com/post/1243927

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