The look on her face

AvacodoCartwheeler · 2024-02-23T13:45:28+00:00

My Dude,

You will need to make a decision. I saw your comment below that you don't want to end it, so here's my advice: tell her you are considering divorce, but would like to give couples counseling a try, and see what she says. If she goes, great! You get to get divorced later down the line! If she says no, great! You get to get divorced now (this is probably the better option)

She's done, you know your done, you are just afraid to admit it to yourself and her. You don't want to be the "bad guy" right? She'll tell you that you are pure evil and being so mean for communicating your needs and wants. You can't avoid the pain, but you can learn from it, adapt, grow, and come out a better man for it.

iwasthrownawayat30 · 2024-02-22T23:01:46+00:00

I didn't call things off, I was completely blindsided.

However, hindsight became my biggest help when suddenly the little irritations caught up to me and within a week I went from devastated to backing her into a corner by refusing to buy her bullshit.

She tried to steal money from me, and it didn't work out very well for her.

I only got to see the look on her face when I told her that she's not selfish, she's entitled, and that if she hadn't felt entitled to try getting back at me, then we would be in much better straights and could have already bought our own place. She tried hiding her anger.

But when I refused to alter information for her benefit, the temper tantrum that I got via text is laughable. She's a teacher who's less mature than her students.

She stomped her feet and told me that I wasn't allowed to talk to her friends/family, because reasons. But then, gradually, some friends approached me, and told me how many of them she had burnt bridges with, and how many she owed thousands of dollars to. And that's thousands to EACH person.

Welp, now I'm in a better place and her career is basically gone. She's isolating her parents from anyone who might inconvenience her.

She's supposedly married now, but that's his problem.

Actingaccordingly007 · 2024-02-22T03:57:36+00:00

Idk if most guys are like this but I keep sticking around because I’m like determined to not let my marriage fail. And sometimes I wonder if that is part of my problem. I can’t bring myself to quit or just let go. I’m just determined that I can fix it. But in reality all I’m doing is throwing good money at bad. Sometimes you’ve gotta just realize a bad investment and cut your losses. I’m really struggling with that right now…the white towel is in my hand, I just have to drop it on the mat.

jimsmythee · 2024-02-21T18:25:48+00:00

My exwife became a pill popper after 5 years and 2 kids. We spent the next 5 years dealing with her addictions to those pills. A stint in rehab, different doctors, addiction meetings, etc. Nothing could counteract her addiction to those pills - narcotics, mood stabilizers, muscle relaxers and sleeping pills. Our lives revolved around her addictions, and then promises that "this disaster will be the last, I swear to you." Followed by more disasters. Then she came upon acceptances and she gas-lit me that "These are medications, prescribed by a doctor!" And everything was my fault. She didn't work, as getting pills became her full time job.

And then it was 2 weeks after new years. She was bitching at me that what I was doing, wasn't enough. Not even close. And I looked at her, and I told her, "I have given up trying. I don't want to be financially responsible for you and your disasters (DUI Crashes) anymore. I want to divorce." We were already doing the separate bedrooms thing, so nothing changed.

Followed by more disasters and this time, she got another DUI, this time the kids were in the car when she crashed. She had jail time and $7500 in DUI fines. And that's when I filed for divorce and moved out. She screamed so loud I thought the neighbors were going to call 911.

Fast forward 9 months and our divorce trial was done and divorce decree in hand -- I made out like a bandit. I heard from the kids she screamed non-stop for 2 days.

HerbEverstanks · 2024-02-21T17:05:54+00:00

That look on her face after we had finished marriage /couples/single counseling since she was sending photos to her x. I had said if you do this again we are getting a divorce.

That look on her face when I told her I was leaving since she had an affair

That look on her face when she says she was raped by said person

That look on her face when she said he forced her to do coke

That look on her face when I told her I had videos and photos that she took of having the affair (over 4 years of affair)

That look on her face when her affair partner got a new girlfriend - her AP was married during his affair but he didn’t care

That look on her face when I moved all of my things out of the marital brothel and left almost everything (This would all be thrown out except documents)

That look on her face when she was served - I missed that one

There were a few looks I missed since I moved over 1000 miles away

That look on her face during our deposition when I said I didn’t force her to put anything in her mouth or any one of her other holes

The look on her face over 3 and a half years later in court when the judge told her to shut her mouth

The look on her face being questioned by my lawyer

The look on her face when she was rejected to get a 4th different lawyer during our third day of trial and rejected

That look on her face when I rejected a 20 year alimony for over 800k with no kids during our trial.

That look on her face when her health care card was denied after claiming over 600k in 6 years mostly due to her alcoholism

Some other (opposite looks)

That look on her face when I asked her to marry me

That look on her face when we got married. (The only contract you sign without knowing the terms)

That look on her face when we (I) bought a house.

That look on her face when she was awarded “temporary maintenance “ of over 5k a month which will last for 8 years for an almost 10 year marriage .

Yes her nostrils were enlarged, her lack of eyebrows had a bend in them where they should have been, wrinkles came out , and scary enough, a 38 year old looked EXACTLY like her 65 year old mother.

Be careful fellas. Some are in it for the long game. Well, and the money of course.

Enough_Youth_4564 · 2024-02-21T07:20:36+00:00

Yep. She looked cruel, not feminine, her nostrils were widened, and she had this cold evil eyes. What turned me off the most is her shouting. She became vulgar. Her shouting made me realize she’s in a dark place and I don’t want her around me anymore. My STBX always gaslightened me as well. Never admitted her mistakes, turned and twisted her stories, and whataboutisim was her way for every discussion I tried to initiate.

Look, at one point you use realize that she is not redeemable and has to go. Write her off.

Title	The look on her face
Author	Actingaccordingly007
Upvotes	19
Comments	16
Date	February 21, 2024 5:08 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1aw3s70/the_look_on_her_face/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/the-look-on-her-face.1245986 https://theredarchive.com/post/1245986

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