I'm not afraid to talk to women I just don't have much to say...

2011-12-12T01:50:18+00:00

You can talk about anything. Watch SimplePickup, those guys talk to girls about their favorite vegetables, nursery rhymes, etc.

It really doesn't matter what you say, it matters much more how you say it.

Try not to give the girl a barrage of interview questions though, and don't ask things that allow for one-word answers. Ask her how she FEELS about stuff. "Oh yeah, how does that make you feel?", etc.

Alternatively, if you want to rip the band-aid off, as long as you can maintain a fun frame, go immediately sexual with the topics. "So when you meet guys in bars, if you're gong to make out with them in the first 30 seconds, is that even up to him or have you already decided?", etc.

Sexual without the fun frame is creepster status, however.

Karaktor · 2011-12-12T00:05:30+00:00

The best thing is you don't even need to say much, just ask them questions!

Hey, are you from around here?

Oh really? So where are you from originally/what's kept you in the area?

That's really cool, I've moved/not moved around a lot/not much, so you do you prefer here to there?

How come?

Conversation is a simple, start broad and branch off, get to the heart of what they're saying. When you run out of 'developing' questions, just ask another broad question and repeat. BAM! A conversation.

People feel closest to you when they think you understand them, you don't need to say much at all. Just give them eye contact, a meaningful developing question and try to understand the 'why' of what they're saying.

And Practise on everyone you can.

MrSparkle666 · 2011-12-12T03:15:23+00:00

There's a couple ways to go about this.

You could decide that you're going to be a scientist of social skills and no matter what happens you're going to try new things until something works. And we define "works" here as finding something that makes people respond and then later, finding things that make people respond positively or negatively or however you want. In such an endeavor it would not matter what you say or do, only that you say or do SOMETHING and see how people respond to it. Over time you will learn what works and what doesn't, and your social skills will improve.

The other way to go about this is to find ways to satisfy yourself. You don't give a fuck about making small talk, you're a deep person so why would you bullshit with someone about some useless topic? That's a waste of time, you're a busy man and you have a mission. That's what you really care about. Anything getting in the way of that mission is to be avoided. Anything not pertaining to that mission is irrelevant. You are a master of your own destiny and you don't give a fuck what other people think. Thus you have value and you are overflowing with value to give others, because when you say something, you say it with feeling and satisfaction, because it is genuine and authentic. You could talk about your pet marmot with girls and if you have passion about it, it will be a perfectly good topic of conversation.

Finally you can approach from the frame that women are sexy and turn you on by their very nature, thus you react to their sexiness by getting turned on and being motivated to action. Your actions in turn cause women to become more sexy, leading to a spiral of sexiness, a vortex from which the two of you will never emerge the same. Seduction is completely unpredictable and that's what makes it so much fun and so satisfying!

Or you can find your own way.

Have fun!

queenw_hipstur · 2011-12-12T08:18:56+00:00

Listen. LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN. 80% of success with women is based upon listening skills. If you listen really well. the things you want to interject with will come. Don't worry about it. You will be fine. Just truly listen, and the follow up questions will be organic.

-marathon- · 2011-12-12T01:28:41+00:00

You're telling me that from the day of your conception up to now, you have done nothing you have enjoyed, felt passionate about, or even felt curious about? I don't believe you. If you have a genuine interest in yourself, the person you're talking to, or even the world in general, you most definitely have something to say.

Karaktor also has the right idea. To add on to his comment, I made a post that can help you get started in asking questions and such: here's the link

You got this, man.

1independentmale · 2011-12-12T23:27:59+00:00

The other responses have nailed this for you, so instead of repeating what they've already said, I'll give you a quick field report from last night.

Me: Married for a long time, in the middle of a divorce. Used to be socially awkward as fuck. Pretty solid these days, I have confidence, but still working on things. Haven't dated in a decade and a half.

Situation: Friend & her boyfriend went out for drinks & karaoke and had a newly divorced female with 'em. They wanted someone to keep her company and called me. Now, it's a bit too early for me to be out hooking up, wife is still living in my house, etc, but I need to get out and do something so I take this as an opportunity to practice. As such, I have no skin in the game - I don't care if this girl is into me or not, it's just practice. That's your first tip: Treat everything as practice. Always. If it doesn't matter, then you won't be nervous because it doesn't matter. You follow?

So I get to the bar and see her. She's got a nice body, at least an 8. She doesn't reciprocate conversation too well, but I try to chat her up anyway. How's it going, what are you drinking, etc. She's still not talking much so I go get a drink, chill for awhile, talk with my friend's new boyfriend and get to know the guy. Before long I see the girl flipping through the song book looking for something to sing so I ask her what kind of music she likes and she opens up a bit.

Now I've got her talking about herself and it starts to get easy. Turns out she likes a lot of the same music I do. I say, "AC/DC? Hell yeah, I grew up listening to that!" She says "Me too!" and next thing I know she's talking about her childhood. I don't have to say much at this point. I'm interjecting a few words here to keep the conversation flowing, but that's about it. She talks, I listen and occasionally ask questions, drop a few words here and there. "Really? What was that like?", "That's awesome", "Oh I do that too, it's no big deal", "I didn't know you had kids, how old are they?"

This girl was shy as hell when I walked in but now she's talking my ear off. A couple of minutes into it and she comes over to my side of the table so we can hear one other better over the music. Now her head is just inches from mine. A couple of times the conversation begins to lull and she starts to head back to her side, but I pull her close and say, "Tell me more about (whatever)."

We sing some karaoke and keep talking and drinking. I'm less than an hour into this and she looks me right in the eyes and tells me I'm an amazing listener. Then she buys me a drink. Then she's in my lap. Then she looks at our mutual friend and says, "Do you think he's going to kiss me?" So I give her a little peck on the lips. She says, "That's not a kiss!", so I put my tongue down her throat. She's happy, I'm happy, everyone is having a good time. If my divorce situation were resolved, I'd have gone for an f-close. All I'd have had to say was "You wanna get out of here?" and she would have been all over it.

Entirely amazing experience given I haven't been in the game since the mid nineties.

The key is to get out of your own head. Get them talking about themselves and listen. Also, practice, practice, practice. You're going to bomb it a few times, turn some girls off, but who cares? You'll never see them again. It doesn't matter.

jsba · 2011-12-11T23:19:36+00:00

I'm going to be the first to say that I don't really believe you. If you were truly unafraid, you'd talk to them even with nothing to say.

Title	I'm not afraid to talk to women I just don't have much to say...
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	11
Comments	26
Date	December 11, 2011 11:10 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/n8xlg/im_not_afraid_to_talk_to_women_i_just_dont_have/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-not-afraid-to-talk-to-women-i-just-dont-have.1325706 https://theredarchive.com/post/1325706

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