I am ashamed of seduction (or rather, myself as a seducer)

2013-10-25T02:57:55+00:00

Don't forget that once you're at a certain level, you're offering value. You aren't sucking value from other people, but rather, giving it away simply as a byproduct of you being you.

I420I · 2013-10-25T02:19:19+00:00

Honestly, it doesn't seem like there's much at all that I can write here. You know exactly what you're doing. You have confidence, you have skill, you're going out with some people and having a good time. Maybe you need to think of running game as playing around and finding new ways to get to know interesting people and get intimate with the ones you like. Maybe you need to stop thinking about what you do as if it matters, as if you're more than a tiny insignificant fly living on a tiny insignificant rock. I mean, really-- you're seducing someone you find attractive, and then you feel guilty about it? Oh, what a big fucking deal. Why don't you spend your time worrying about something useful, like how our collective civilization is going to stop itself from veering off the big bad cliff into oblivion?

And besides all that, what is this "low hanging fruit" bullshit? The thrill you get from a peach at the top of a tree comes from you valuing the trip up. That's right, you're what makes it better. It's the same damn fruit. As long as it's your type of fruit, you can learn to enjoy it in the same way. By eating it.

<3 discussion welcomed, happy hunting

TerriblePUA · 2013-10-25T02:50:01+00:00

Every man in your family has seduced at least one woman, going back thousands of years. Seduction is normal - admirable even - it's what leads to the continuation of our species.

Canned lines and routines aren't for everyone. I don't use them because they feel fake to me too. Like I'm rehearsing lines from a cheesy romcom.

I've build somewhat of a reputation among my friends as being able to pick up girls on a whim and they don't treat me any differently for it. My male friends might ask me how on occasion and my female friends might joke about it with me, but they all know I'm still the same guy I was a year ago - just a bit more confident.

If you're confident and actually make an effort, you wont need lines, girls will like you for who you are and there's nothing wrong with that. There's no need to compromise your morals to get better and more comfortable seducing women, it just takes practice.

stornm · 2013-10-25T15:09:02+00:00

Ok, you obviously know the skills. Let me ask you this, what's so terrible about being confident, escalating, etc. If you're putting on a persona then I can get where you're feeling not in line with your beliefs, but if you're just an amplified version of you, then it's all good.

You feel guilty the fact that you looked up advice? Open up any women's magazine, look at the COUNTLESS advice columns "how to make a guy into you", "sexy ways to make him want you." Women read this type of shit ALL THE TIME. But for some reason, that's accepted. When a guy reads it, there's a huge stigma. Because social conditioning has led us to believe we should just know this already.

jetlag84 · 2013-10-25T04:15:34+00:00

In buddhism, there's this idea of the raft. Buddhist practice and teaching is like a raft to get you from one shore to another, but once you've already crossed the river, you don't keep carrying the raft with you. You leave it behind you. I think game is a lot like that. For better or worse, there IS something a bit cheesy and embarrassing about being a "seduction student". It implies certain things. Namely that you haven't reached the other side of a river yet. A lot of this stuff is essentially self-help with a focus on dating, and most people are hesitant to admit they're reading self-help books. But you have skill at it and you understand that it's all natural. I guess what I'm saying is you'll get to a point where you stop framing seduction as this scheming activity, and start seeing it for what it really is.........without all the names and abbreviations for every action and touch and conversational turn. It's all just human nature. Intellectually you know that, you just need to get to that place where you know it instinctively as well. That's when you will let the raft sit where it is, and you won't feel embarrassed by the labels because you won't have any.

sedditdee · 2013-10-25T04:29:20+00:00

Stop being such a little analytical bitch.

Hey, you asked for it.

The one part that you left out of your post was what the so-called "self-limiting belief" actually is -- you labeled it "guilt", but you didn't mention how the word describes your particular situation. Seduction itself has nothing to do with being "bashful" or "ashamed", so your belief is still unknown.

Izirath · 2013-10-25T10:58:17+00:00

Don't see it as seduction, if you go out with the goal of genuinely getting to know a person because you're interesting and they're interesting and you think you could have a great time together, it all comes more naturally.

HappyJerk · 2013-10-25T13:50:00+00:00

the techniques you learn here a weapon; they can be used for good or evil. there is nothing to be ashamed of.

And this stuff about "authenticity" is just horseshit. You're not "authentic" with 99% of the people you just meet, you only open yourself after you know them for a long time, why should it be different with women?

itsmevichet · 2013-10-25T14:13:42+00:00

I am ashamed of seduction

Then stop doing it.

You know what you want in life, and what you don't. At least, I hope you do.

If this is not your path, get off of it and find your own.

I never feel like I'm cheating anyone when I run game. That's because I know I'm fun to be around, that I have interesting things going on, and that usually people want to know more about me than the other way around. I built myself up to that, not for game, but because life would be goddamn boring otherwise. Game just happens to be really fun, and take advantage of that.

So, I guess what I'm saying is that if you feel like you're swindling others socially, then you probably are.

Though, I've heard hundreds of guys express the same thing you did, with the same sentiments, and it's usually a case of them having low self-esteem, and believing in a social narrative where they have to behave the way Disney princes behave. If that's you, you have to decide whether you enjoy meeting women more than you enjoy going through life not offending anyone.

Shit, if you're good at game, there's almost no way you could offend anyone.

kingcal · 2013-10-25T03:30:47+00:00

Where are you living?

stornm · 2013-10-25T10:10:07+00:00

Thank you gentlemen,

All very good points. I wonder though, how do you guys actually deal with the seduction stuff in your lives? i.e. do you tell anyone that you've been involved with this etc.?

1vibe · 2013-10-25T16:45:57+00:00

Read the power of now. Your pain body is killing you.

Title	I am ashamed of seduction (or rather, myself as a seducer)
Author	stornm
Upvotes	8
Comments	21
Date	October 25, 2013 1:41 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1p5ynq/i_am_ashamed_of_seduction_or_rather_myself_as_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-am-ashamed-of-seduction-or-rather-myself-as-a.1360513 https://theredarchive.com/post/1360513

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