She dropped the divorce bombshell on me almost a month and a half ago. Early on she told me she wanted to be the one to file, and I agreed because, well, I didn’t want to get divorced and I thought maybe, given enough time, she’d realize she was making a huge mistake.

Weeks later, well after we’d both gotten lawyers, there was still no filing. I kept checking the website every day, nothing. Finally texted her and asked why, given ample time and opportunity, she hadn’t yet. She said she was waiting on her lawyer, things were moving slow, and if she could file right now she would.

So I waited a few more days, nothing. Started getting frustrated with the wait. Called and spoke with my lawyer’s paralegal and asked if it would be possible to “jump ahead” and file before her side did. She had the petition sent to me later that afternoon, I signed and returned, and she had it filed by the end of the day. It finally posted on the website Friday.

STBX doesn’t know yet. Plan to text her tomorrow and let her know I was tired of her lawyer dragging their feet and tired of feeling like I have no control over anything that’s been happening, even if this is mostly symbolic.

Found out she’s been chatting up some tattooed, muscle bound douche she met on Tinder recently. Seems like it’s more than just fucking going on, which I hate because we have 50/50 of our 4yo boy, and I fucking knew she was going to immediately jump to someone even though she had told me that she “didn’t want to be with anyone” right now. I hate the thought of my son meeting any other man in her life, but that there’s nothing I can do.

So I hope the fact I stole her thunder and filed first ruins her day a bit. That and the fact that as she’s keeping the house and has to buy me out with half the equity, all the home value estimates for our home went up a lot recently. She tried to offer me $45k initially based on faulty math, but now she’s gonna owe closer to $75k. Her mortgage after the refinance is going to skyrocket. And she still has to pay me child support. Hope blowing up our almost 10-year marriage and our family was worth it!