How to deal with rejection

• Don't take it personally.

Easier said than done, I know.

But the truth is that rejection only affects you as much as you allow it to affect you.

Neither does it mean you are not enough. And if you interpret rejection as a negative evaluation of your worth as a human being, consider changing your social environment, work on being less approval seeking and validate yourself instead.

You can of course tell yourself that the girl who rejected you is a bitch, that all women are shallow, that you are not good enough etc. but none of this really serves you well.

All it does is it drags you down into the abyss of sexual frustration and that will make you miserable.

Just realize that rejection doesn't cause you any real harm aside from the negative short-term feeling our brain interprets as real physical pain.

And if you are surrounded by friends who make you feel bad for having been rejected, stop hanging with them.

• If every girl or guy you approach or date ends up rejecting you, you are doing something wrong.

Often times, the problem behind this is:

Feeling not good enough.

There are many ways to work on this.

You can start daily meditation, affirmations (I am enough), doing something you are afraid of every day to increase your self-confidence, seeking therapy, etc.

Low status and submissive behavior (slouching, not able to sustain eye-contact for long, not listening intuitively, not being present and engaged with girls).

One of the best ways to improve this is to have some sort of role model to look up to and to learn from them.

This can be an actor you really like, a coach or mentor, a football player, a family member or friend of yours who is very good with girls and people in general, etc.

Look at how they carry themselves, how they talk to and behave around people and women, and what habits they have.

Poor hygiene.

Easy to fix.

Shower daily, have clean fingernails, brush your teeth every day, have a proper haircut, smell good, wear clothes that fit you and make you feel comfortable in your skin, and simply take more care of yourself.

Most, if not all women appreciate it when a guy takes care of his hygiene.

• Deal with rejection the same way you would deal with losing a 100 dollar bill on the street.

Or better yet, deal with it the way you would deal with any setback and adversity in your life.

Although losing a 100 dollar bill sucks, you know you will have it back because money is always there.

There is always a way to bring in money.

It works the same way with women.

Just because one or two girls rejected you, it doesn't mean you will never find another girl or that you are a hopeless loser.

• Understand the psychology behind rejection.

There is a biological reason why rejection hurts us so much.

It is because when we experience rejection, our brain interprets it as real and physical pain.

It interprets rejection as the same kind of pain we feel when we fall or hit our toe against furniture.

This is a leftover response from our ancestors from thousands of years ago. Back in the times where we had to hunt for food and could not survive on our own, rejection from your tribe was a death sentence.

Because a tribe member who got rejected would be ostracized and could no longer survive in the wilderness, gather food and other supplies, and could not reproduce.

Today, however, we can live on our own and survive just fine because gathering food, water, clothes, etc. no longer requires us to hunt saber-tooth cats and to risk our lives.

We also have an abundance of potential partners to choose from at all times, especially thanks to dating apps and social media.

What does this mean?

It means that you need to prove to yourself that nothing bad actually happens when you get rejected.

Here is a practice to do that:

Look at your hands, touch your body. Notice how you are still there. Your hands are still there. Your heart is still beating. Your brain works perfectly fine. You are still a man/a woman. And there is no physical wound whatsoever.

Everything is the same as it was before the rejection happened.

You can consciously decide how you react to this and what meaning you give it.

You have the freedom to decide to let it make you do things such as never approaching women or men you feel attracted to, playing 'hard to get', and let it define your worth as an individual.

But you can also decide to let go of it, to take it as a sign that you probably wouldn't want to be with this girl either, and to let rejection empower you because it means that you have the courage and the self-confidence to go for what you want.

Most women love action takers, someone who goes after what they want without making excuses.