Did any of you guys take off from work when fighting divorce case? It is really draining me mentally I am unable to focus at work, especially when I think that I may lose my kids.

SunAndMoon23 · 2024-03-29T14:18:08+00:00

I would suggest to take a day or two off to mentally recharge. And then try to view work as a distraction. When I was going through the process, going into work felt like an escape from the situation at home. Something about just being away and then interacting with coworkers felt therapeutic in a way. That’s just me though.

21YearsofHell · 2024-03-29T10:37:00+00:00

I haven’t taken time off from work, because I’m older, and retired, though I still have business interests and investments I need to devote attention to.

However, because of the intense focus on my Divorce, I’ve taken my eye off so many other balls… for example I recently nearly missed an application deadline for building rights on four plots of land I own that would’ve cost me a fortune and pretty much ruined me, especially as I’d still have had to keep paying the b*tch. Then there was the time that the separation stress undermined my immune system and made me ill just when I was trying to sell my biggest real estate asset in November 2021 and I ended up on an IV drip in ER in Hospital for 10 days with Sepsis. I missed my chance to sell that asset right at the top of the market. There are many other examples.

The time I’ve lost because of her abusing the system by claiming in court that we weren’t separated, applying for six figure “emergency” maintenance, trying to fraudulently change jurisdictions and so on.

They suck your energy and life force one way or another.

jimsmythee · 2024-03-26T19:47:09+00:00

I took a day off here and there for court meetings. but work was always my escape from the toxic exwife.

AdventurousTrash1645 · 2024-03-26T06:58:47+00:00

I found it very hard to focus at work. I don't go in the office any more because I work for her father. I would not wish working for your father in law while going through divorce on anyone. Now I work from home and am extremely isolated.

GoHorns1998 · 2024-03-26T01:10:36+00:00

Sadly no. For the entire year after she left, I didn't miss a day of work, then quit one job and started another without any time off in between, and haven't been able to take a day off yet.

I really don't like my field of work, been trying very hard to get into something that actually has benefits and lets me take a dump without my phone blowing up.

AirSailer · 2024-03-25T19:11:01+00:00

Take a fees days or long weekend off if you can. Go camping, sleep in your car if necessary, just to get away, go for some long hikes. Your brain needs to be reset back to fundamentals (i.e. nature) every now and then. I did that multiple times during my divorce, it was a great way to refresh.

Moms_Sketti88 · 2024-03-25T15:01:13+00:00

Does your employer have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP)? Sometimes filing with this and utilizing that program can help.

Is0prene · 2024-03-25T13:46:08+00:00

If you need to take an emotional day off of work then do it. Don't bring that with you to work. Fill your mind with other things. After work go exercise, see a therapist, and possibly get on an anti-depressant if you aren't already. They will all help with balancing out your emotions during this ordeal.

Signal-Dot2326 · 2024-03-25T11:02:24+00:00

Thank God for my new job when she filed for divorce been a great distraction made new friends, really helped my self worth, they love me there my boss is amazing. Only time I take off work is for holidays or court dates

upvotersfortruth · 2024-03-25T03:34:13+00:00

You need to learn how to compartmentalize. It's not perfect or completely, but the divorce will consume you if you don't. Losing your job will do nothing for anyone. The court will see that you've intentionally quit and impute income to you; you will only free up time to wallow further in your misery; you will be worse off financially without a subsequent benefit in the divorce.

Take a week. Get your head on straight. Dive back in. Work can actually be a respite and place of peace. Many of us poured our hearts into our work to escape the divorce. A better result.

Also, get some professional help. It's worth it. You will get through this and you won't LOSE your kids. Under all but the worst circumstances, you're likely to get joint custody with ample co-parenting time. And your time will be quality time, without the STBX to worry about.

Chin up. Head down. Let's go, you got this.

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