In light of the recent discussions around domestic violence, I thought it might be worth discussing an issue that exists with our national, public funded, domestic violence hotline (1800RESPECT)
When the national domestic violence hotline receives a call it screens it according to the Family Violence Risk Assessment and Risk Management Framework and Practice Guides.
Responses to men who report or are assessed to be victims of violence in a heterosexual relationship
in all circumstances where a man is initially assessed as or claiming to be a victim of family violence in the context of a heterosexual relationship, you should refer him to a men's family violence service for comprehensive assessment or to the Victims of Crime Helpline. His female (ex)partner must always be referred to a women's family violence service for assessment, irrespective of whether she is thought to be the victim or aggressor.
There is some additional explanatory text which you might like to read. The basic rational is that men presenting as victims may also be abusers (true for either gender to some extent).
There is a callout to the Victims of Crime Helpline for people in emergency situations, but most will be referred to a family violence service.
AFAIK, there are two family violence services 1800RESPECT refers men to.
The first is the Men's Referral Service operated by No To Violence. Here's how they describe themselves and a few other services they offer:
No to Violence provides a range of services to support men concerned about their behaviour to change what they are doing and keep women, children and communities safer.
The second possibility is a referral to Mensline's Changing For Good service. Here's how they describe themselves:
The Changing for Good service provides a one-to-one telephone counselling service for men who want to maintain respectful relationships without using violence.
How is it okay that the services available, via our national hotline, to male victims of domestic violence (who aren't at imminent risk) are services which presume the male is the abuser?
[–]alterumnonlaedere 89 points90 points91 points (4 children) | Copy Link
Victim blaming at it's worst, "What did you do to her to make her treat you like that?".
[–][deleted] 54 points55 points56 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Reminds me of that repost a few months ago, about a husband who felt like divorcing his wife after finding out that she perceives him as a potential abuser and rapist monstrosity for his gender. By her own account, she was influenced by "horror stories" on "mom's fora", and prepared a safe bag in the event that he should beat her to within an inch of death. 97% of the comments were calling him a narcissist who probably abused his wife to have elicited that reaction, inventing more speculative bullshit as justification for their suspicion and contempt of him, and to humiliate him (the mobs spread onto Twitter as well).
[–]Cyb3rd31ic_Citiz3n 31 points32 points33 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I watched this unfolding. It was disgusting, vile and dehumanising. If your partner cannot trust you because they think you are the type of person who "might" do something absolutely heinous you have every right to be angery and upset with them. The vilification of that poor man was agrovating to the extreme.
[–]AigisxLabrys 21 points22 points23 points (0 children) | Copy Link
These same people would get mad at a man if he demanded a paternity test.
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points (0 children) | Copy Link
And these same women would have a meltdown if a man had a safe bag "just in case" the wife cheated on him, abused their children, or did any other horrid thing.
[–]galacticdude7 89 points90 points91 points (5 children) | Copy Link
No fucking surprise that the original thread got removed for "No propaganda or shilling"
[–]alterumnonlaedere 40 points41 points42 points (0 children) | Copy Link
And that's the conservative Australian sub.
[–]Low_Rich_5436 20 points21 points22 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I wonder, do the mods doing that all over reddit believe in their own positions, or are they just removing things they disagree with under consciously false pretense?
[–][deleted] 14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Reddit is all about shaping the accepted narrative.
[–]cunticles 4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Domestic violence hotline that doesn't accept male callers sounds like it's in breach of discrimination laws surely?
[–]Usual_Meaning5180 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Equal rights actually 😂
[–][deleted] 57 points58 points59 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I feel deeply for my Aussie brothers. If I am ever in a situation where I am being abused by a partner, I most certainly would risk going to prison for defending myself. I’ve been bullied my whole life and had shitty parents. I will not put up with it. If I go to jail, so be it.
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree with you.
In fact I would go further and if some people try to ruin my reputation I verbally fight back. We may even launch counterprotests.
I would also hire a good lawyer because I will need it.
[–][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Pretty much nothing more than "always doubt the word of a man, and assume he has bad intentions, even if he is crying for help." The funny thing is, in my (and it seems many people's experience), it would be highly unreasonable to conclude that men are more deceptive than women. Clearly a more powerful force than our experiences is at play here, tainting our judgement.
[–]jessi387 50 points51 points52 points (8 children) | Copy Link
What’s ironic is there was just a post about “targeted killings of women in Australia” and how Australia needs to better improve its situation on domestic violence. LOL
[–][deleted] 54 points55 points56 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Any murder of a woman for whatever reason is apparently premeditated femicide effected out of spite for all women. Their victim mentality is ridiculous; indeed, one might even say it's sickening that they're using the irrelevant murders of other women to opportunistically victimise themselves, screaming about being systematically eradicated. They have no respect for victims of actual targeted violence (let alone, those targeted for the purpose of extermination)--for instance, men, who are disproportionately targeted by criminals, armies, in feuds, etc. Many mafiosos will proudly proclaim that they don't target women--equivalent to saying they target men with violence. If anything, there's 'androcide'.
But a woman is murdered by her jealous ex, and we automatically conclude it's because he has the same mentality as Elliot Rodger and is trying to genocide women? Lmao tf. Besides the most fanatical incels (who arguably hate "attractive" and "undeserving" men as much, if not more than women, though obviously no one acknowledges the fact that they're misandristic as well/more aptly described as misanthropic rather than merely misogynistic) and infanticide (practiced not because male babies are perceived as inherently more worthy of life, as feminists would lead you to believe, but because they can be exploited for more agricultural output--so it is not necessarily hatred* of women that motivates female infanticide) I know of no one that kills women for being women.
*It's often overlooked how feminists have hijacked the very concept of 'hate', using it for the description of unequal perception and treatment, rather than the traditional definition of contempt, disgust, and dehumanisation. I know of no traditional society that views women as disgusting, contemptible subhumans. Nothing but more baseless self-victimisation.
[–]jessi387 27 points28 points29 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Propaganda at its best. I just wish more people saw through it
[–]HTSDoIThinkOfaUYouC -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah, what's up with those women getting stalked and being viciously harassed to the point of never feeling safr?
It's all the fault of the feminists.
Get some perspective, yeah? Because if you believe that no society condones or ignores violence against women to the point that they die, I have a bridge I'd like to sell you
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Then sell me that bridge. Because you're fucking insane if you think society actively supports the abuse and murder of women.
[–]alterumnonlaedere 21 points22 points23 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Well, this is Australia's national domestic violence policy response and implementation - The National Plan to End Violence against Women and Children 2022-2032.
[–]jessi387 20 points21 points22 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I can’t even look cuz just from the title, it makes me sick
[–]RiP_Nd_tear 23 points24 points25 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh my f__king god, not again!
[–]OddSeraphleft-wing male advocate 8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Was about to say this.
[–]mrBored0m 53 points54 points55 points (1 child) | Copy Link
One of the most shittiest countries for men you can think of.
[–]rammo123 18 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
*relative to women from that country. I'd definitely rather be a man in Australia than one in Iran.
[–]Virtual_Piece 33 points34 points35 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The mod team did a number on this post huh
[–]RSA1RSA 8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
But hey, misandry doesn't exist...
[–]captainhornheart 5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Is there a proper source somewhere? On the website, the FAQs say:
I don't get why they have to state the bit about "most people experiencing sexual assault and domestic and family violence", as that could be stigmatising for male sufferers to read, and of course real-world experiences may differ, but it does appear that their policy is to treat everyone equally. Is there any evidence to the contrary?
[–]Low_Rich_5436 14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
All professionnals know to keep up appearances where it counts, such as public statements they can easily be attacked on. They do slip though, like in
"They can be experiencing violence themselves or be impacted by the violence being perpetrated on a loved one, for example, their sister, mother, brother or friend."
No father of course could be impacted, because that would suggest a mother could be perpetrating.
[–]KordisMenthis 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Also they are careful with the language. They will say 'men and boys can be victims' but then immediately pivot to men victimised by fathers or gay partners. They will avoid discussion of female-perpetrated abuse at all costs.
[–]Usual_Meaning5180 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep I had this problem when I was being battered, threatened and beaten by my partner,
My ex partner tried killing me a few times with weapons, with her car etc and because I had not experienced/ learned the language or even had the ability to be process it I didn't... It's 10+ years later I realize what I was in... I also didn't see her as a threat because she was so little I truly was foolish. I'm not physically or mentally violent so I was absolutely messed up by this. It's messed up ... Dv is not good.
Physically at the time I was 100+kgs and 200cms tall and fit ~ 25 years old
She was tiny ~ 160cm and 40kgs
The usual statements from Drs, police and phone services were toughen up "princess" and walk away ... You don't like it do something about it etc etc All health services and councilors were like be a man... The police just laughed on the phone - your a big guy just sort her out. Another time they said when you have killed her call us back.
I was less than impressed and unfortunately for me I have been forever traumatized by this experience... So I'm shocked to see what they are targeting with dv these days - brainwashing young boys is just crap.
I see many people advise for support to call out antagonists and insult / confront them, Lol If someone is unhinged violent and not of sound mind unfortunately I doubt there is much console and by upsetting them and calling them out I don't know if it helps. In the case of the ex she would beat or at least try to beat the shit out of me. She also tried to mentally intimidate me but to no avail for her...
Apparently it's a rarity and non issue for women to abuse men ... I'm fortunate that my dad was a dv survivor from his mum and that he could guide me some guidance and helped me get my shit together and leave.
Where I grew up (Byford wa) dv of women to children and men was normal and in the street I lived on both houses directly next to where I grew up had women beating husbands and children. Of the two male neighbors one was a chronic alcoholic and drank himself out of the family life
The other killed himself...
As far as I know this is normal and is the hidden truth of dv which there is no innocent party and truly it only ends with walking away if you can...
[–]NHS_24 -3 points-2 points-1 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Australia 🦘🌏 just become Super duper Hard core radical Feminist plus Communist country.
Men who lives there are already 💀⚰️🪦🥀.
[+]LucastheMysticleft-wing male advocate -11 points-10 points-9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Astaghfirullah. That's... I'm speechless. May they beg for God's forgiveness.
[+]eli_ashe -16 points-15 points-14 points (2 children) | Copy Link
fwiw, according to the A.I. at any rate, there are separate lines for DV services for both men and women, and each of them offer services specifically for them to 'change their abusive and violent behavior'.
in other words, this headline is true, but it is also true for women, each having their own separate DV lines, and each being offered similar options, albeit tailored to men and women respectively. At least that is, according to the A.I.
[–]KordisMenthis 6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
No there aren't equivalent services. In Victoria in Australia there is a specialist DV service for women and gay men. Male victims of female abusers specifically are directed towards the standard victims of crime helpline.
There are also no equivalent lines helping abusive women change. If you read the policies addressing this they explicitly state that women who are abusive must be viewed as victims primarily and must have their feelings validated and that their abusive behaviour must be understood as a reaction to their partner being abusive.
[–]eli_ashe -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
let me amend my previous comment with this. try not to merely react to it.
The A.I. said what I said it said:
me: "does the women's dv line offer the same services, e.g. services to help women change their abusive and violent behavior?"
A.I.: "Yes, in Australia, there are services available to help women who want to change their abusive and violent behavior. While the specific services may vary by state and organization, support is generally available for anyone seeking help with these issues.
For example, Relationships Australia offers support groups and counseling for abusive and abused partners, which includes services for women who are seeking to change their behavior1. Additionally, the Women’s Domestic Violence Helpline provides support and referral for people experiencing family and domestic violence, including those who are concerned about their violent and abusive behaviors1.
These services are part of a comprehensive approach to addressing domestic violence, ensuring that support is available not only for victims but also for individuals who recognize the need to change their behavior and are seeking help to do so."
No longer quoting the conversation.
note that this is after a few layers of questioning of the A.I. to try and specify the questions.
the links it provides are to here
without doing more extensive looking into it, some of the relevant quotes to take from the source that show the misandrist takes alluded to by the OP:
"DVConnect Womensline(link is external)
DVConnect exists to help Queenslanders escape domestic, family and sexual violence by providing crisis helplines, as well as emergency transport and accommodation away from violence. DVConnect is a not-for-profit organisations that has provided statewide specialist domestic, family and sexual violence crisis counselling, intervention, information, safety planning and pathways to safety for almost 20 years."
Note that this is a women's specific line.
"DVConnect Mensline(link is external)
Free state wide telephone service that provides counselling and referral for men for a range of issues especially those who have experienced or use domestic and family violence and those who are concerned about a friend or family member.."
Note this is a men's specific line.
There is therefore a specific mens and womens line, ostensibly designed for men and women respectively.
But also note the key difference in language. On the women's line, there is no indication that in the intro text that implies that women might be doing domestic violence, nor indications that there are resources available for women who are doing DV to seek help.
While for the men's specific line there is exactly that.
Which is fucked up. Quoted text is for the (ironic) queensland region.
Read that how you will, but that is what the A.I. said after a bit of poking at it, those the links it provided, and that the quoted text from the links.
So sounds pretty misandrist on one point and it is the more important point, but that there are sex specific lines offered doesn't seem obviously sexist at any rate.