I guess this was a quick divorce, initiated last year November and ending now at the start of may. Initiation was from her side. Wrote a few posts.
The first few months were tough during the Negotiations but since mid march life was good. I think. Anyhow, she isn’t living rent free in my head for a while and I’m doing extremely well - therapy, happy, sport, enjoy the new city, etc.
Until today that is…
When I gave her some thought when I went to Spa, that I took her to. She was on my mind whilst relaxing there. And as the divorce papers will be signed in a few days I wanted to reflect on her and just close the chapter - hence allowed time for her in my mind. And re signing the papers I am excited about and can’t wait to be officially divorced.
However. On my way home I found this poem randomly on Instagram and started crying uncontrollably. I really am happy this is over, that papers are getting signed and that she is out of my life. But god damn, every time I read this poem i cry and then get softer emotions towards her…
Poem below: ——————————
I'm just so glad you exist.
When I say I miss you, I don't mean it in some sad miserable way, but in a way that honors that connection we had. Not in some regretful way, or not even in some way that says I wanna see you again, but I just truly miss you.
This isn't coming from a negative place, and you aren't the only thing in my mind anymore, But there are moments which I steal away and think, wow.. You would have loved to see this.
This isn't a: I wanna be friends again.. Or even a: I want you in my life again.. Because I know that we both know deep in our hearts That we aren't meant to be, and that's okay.
And as tragic as our story was, I hope you know that; every memory of us has infinite value to me, and couldn't be replaced for the world. I will love and cherish every single experience we had, but also honor that memory, by moving forward with acceptance.
I know there's an infinite amount of words that have gone unsaid, but I know that no words could say more than the silence between us.
That being said, I'm just so glad you exist.
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