Can chemistry be created or is it something that can't be changed?

DevuSM · 2024-10-20T23:15:24+00:00

You manufacture it.

For her, it just happens.

SavagishlySleepy · 2024-10-21T00:03:07+00:00

lol I forgot what sub this is and my brain went to the chemical sciences.

Wean1eHu11 · 2024-10-20T23:18:59+00:00

You can but I have yet to see it be as powerful as instant chemistry. It’s often not worth the effort

Practical-Macaroon38 · 2024-10-20T23:58:23+00:00

Attraction can grow but only if the other person is willing to give it enough time to see if it does

For instance, if someone has a physical type that they’re attracted to & someone else doesn’t meet it, then they’ll either have to be open to changing their mind about what they like, or it’s a dealbreaker & that’s that.

Sometimes, you might be physically attracted to someone but you are so put off by their initial impression that you aren’t willing to give it more time to see if you’ll change your mind about them.

Majority of the time, it’s much easier to move on & test someone else than it is to continually go back & see if the attraction grows.

That’s usually why most people won’t be willing to see someone again after 1 or 2 dates. That’s usually more than enough time to see if there’s some physical attraction & chemistry with that person.

Majority of the time our intuition is right, especially when it comes to first dates. If someone isn’t at least a “maybe” in your mind then there’s no point forcing it that will rarely change.

That’s also why we’ll hear stories of how a guy & girl only started dating after being co-workers together for 5 years. Another story might be about a pair of best friends who eventually started dating.

The attraction grew for them because they gave it a lot of time but it doesn’t always work like this, so these are some exceptions.

poly_nerdy_panda · 2024-10-22T16:28:43+00:00

no but who cares just fuck them and they will realize your not a match and just stop text next next next.. I've had fucks that we knew it was just for sex because we had shit in common, I fucked this rich girl because she was tired of rich boys .. i felt like her project and she realized she gets no value besides a good orgasm by hangout with me.. so I would fuck her and bolt . this lasted about 6 months and she found some lawyer to marry so we stoped

MSHUser · 2024-10-20T23:42:31+00:00

Complex question but my answer for this one is it can't be changed.

Whenever I hear phrases "you can create attraction or chemistry" it's not just sedditors who say this. Women themselves would word this as "I didn't really find him attractive at first, I thought he was kinda ugly, but when I got to know his personality, I became immensely attracted to him."

I commented on this before but I'll comment it here. What those women were likely talking about is they had a baseline level of attraction for the guy. Because it isn't at strong as the level of attraction she would feel for let's say Chad, she can mistake this as her thinking some guy is ugly. If that guy also happens to be a nerd or have some minor behavioral problems, then they use that to say "he's not cute, he's a nerd, he's weird" so now they think those shallow reasons are the reasons they're not attracted to him. But usually with baseline level attraction, if she gets to know him and really likes his personality, that baseline level of attraction increases and eventually becomes genuine attraction and desire. Because baseline attraction is hard to tell if it's there or not (cuz you usually feel nothing, not sparks nor repulsion), people confuse it with they never felt attraction for them to begin with until they got to know them. If I don't like someone, I usually get an instinctive repulsion feeling. If I feel this, then no matter what I do, that person won't become attractive to me. If a girl looks at me and gets an instinctive repulsion, then no matter what I do or how I position myself, she's not going to be interested in me. It's the same shit here.

There's another aspect of "creating chemistry" and those are situations where you date and have sex with a girl who's not attracted to you. Usually what happens here is you know what turns her on and you consistently hit those buttons to make her horny and excited. But that's not really attraction, what happens is by pushing those buttons, she feels aroused. Think of this like a girl you're not really into who knows how to give really great blowjobs. Just keep hitting that spot and even she can make you climax. It's the same thing here.

Ok-Abbreviations9212 · 2024-10-21T00:19:00+00:00

I don't think you can "create" chemistry, but I also don't think chemistry is always something is instantly created out of thin air.

I think the analogy to chemistry is because it's an interaction between two people, just like actual chemistry is an interaction between molecules and atoms. Each person influences the other.

So I think if you wanted to try to find that chemistry, it involves finding that thing that attracts the two of you together. If you want to call that "creation or influence"..... I think that's misleading, it's just finding something that already exists.

TLu_03 · 2024-10-21T02:40:45+00:00

You need to form a connection. The attraction will follow from there. IME anyways.

SithLordJediMaster · 2024-10-20T23:25:02+00:00

A covalent bond occurs when atoms share electrons between them, while an ionic bond forms when one atom completely transfers electrons to another, creating oppositely charged ions that attract each other; essentially, covalent bonds involve sharing, while ionic bonds involve giving and taking electrons. Key differences:

Electron transfer:In a covalent bond, electrons are shared between atoms, whereas in an ionic bond, one atom transfers electrons to another, forming ions with opposite charges.
Atom types:Ionic bonds typically form between a metal and a nonmetal, while covalent bonds form between two nonmetals.
Polarity:Covalent bonds can be polar (unequal sharing of electrons) or non-polar (equal sharing), depending on the electronegativity of the atoms involved.

Examples:

Covalent bond: The bond between hydrogen atoms in a water molecule (H2O).
Ionic bond: The bond between sodium and chlorine in sodium chloride (table salt).

Dandys3107 · 2024-10-21T10:17:46+00:00

It's like you can adjust to her type with different attitudes, but she needs to cooperate too. It can happen on its own, but you also often need to awaken it if girl acts too passive.

BurnItDownSR · 2024-10-21T15:16:50+00:00

Attraction is always growing, that's doubly true for women.

Guys just try to understand it from their perspective, where physical attraction makes up about 70% of their total attraction which is why its hard for them to grasp the idea that attraction can in fact be built.

For women physical attraction is more like 30% and the rest is determined by what he's like as a person.

Here's a thought experiment to help you understand:

Imagine being on a date with a girl who is so down bad for you, she's even the one who approached you and asked you out, you're out for drinks and it feels like you're definitely having sex that night but in the middle of the date you tell her you're on the carnivore diet and talk about how crazy vegans are and then it turns out she's actually vegan.

All of a sudden, your chances of getting laid plummet.

Whereas, if it was her who talked about being vegan first and about how insane carnivore people are, you'd probably just keep your mouth shut so you can fuck her a few times before you get tired of trying to hide your eating habits from her or until she finds out and dumps you.

I literally know women who openly say, "No, he isn't handsome but damn the way he acts is so sexy."

Why do you think guys like Russel Brand and Pete Davidson get lots of hot women?

And before anyone makes the excuse of them being rich and famous, the majority of hot women they get are more rich and more famous than them and those women definitely have access to much better looking options than them.

Given that this is how the dynamics of attraction between men and women are, chemistry can absolutely be created, because you can absolutely mold your behaviour and how you interact with people.

And if you struggle to do that, that's just because you don't really know how or you don't have the social skillset necessary to do so.

But that's why subs like this exist, so you can get advice on how to create attraction and chemistry and on how to develop the skillset necessary to execute on that.

It's just sad that there are some people on this sub who try to hold others down and push this ideology that attraction cannot be built.

Title	Can chemistry be created or is it something that can't be changed?
Author	Norpeeeee
Upvotes	13
Comments	14
Date	October 20, 2024 11:09 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1g8bqs2/can_chemistry_be_created_or_is_it_something_that/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/can-chemistry-be-created-or-is-it-something-that.1533505 https://theredarchive.com/post/1533505

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