Women want the same things

The model of dating that is permeating out society is that of the attacker and defender. The men are "fighting" for a woman, or they try to "seduce" them (which again implies an active and a passive part). There is even the infamous "Last Minute Resistance" to overcome.

This is a very bad model, because women want the same things as men! They also like sex and they also want a relationship of some kind. Sure, there are some cultural differences, and those are likely to remain, but no matter what you are looking for, in 2024 there are a lot of women who want the same things.

The conclusion is that when you are meeting someone, you should not be looking for the right things to say to get her into bed, but instead try to figure out if you are a good match. The classical PU arrives at pretty much the same conclusion ("be the prize"), but I feel that it still models dating as a fight, merely with sometimes reversed roles.

Instead, I argue that dating is a colaborative effort, where - after some initial attraction - you embark on a journey to figure out if you are a good match.

Disclaimer:

It sounds a lot like "just be yourself", but that is not only what I am advocating. Become someone interesting and a better person first, and check with other men and women that you are on the right track. But once you arrive at a place where you (and notable others) are happy with you, don't view dating as a fight. View it as a mutual research project.