How can I overcome my fear of going into the city / bars alone?

Chiiiicckkeeennn · 2025-01-20T04:38:19+00:00

By doing it

Interesting-Set8600 · 2025-01-20T05:34:35+00:00

Start by doing other things alone. Go out to the movies, go out to dinner alone. Act as if you’re in a committed relationship with yourself. Know yourself, and love yourself, but most importantly, enjoy yourself.

vitamin-cheese · 2025-01-20T05:41:26+00:00

Exposure theory. Just start doing it and eventually it will become easier and easier. But to get over the fear you have to expose yourself even if it’s small steps.

I_suckyoungblood · 2025-01-21T08:31:03+00:00

Stop thinking about what’s going to happen or what will happen when you’re in there. Make a mental image of you going in there, ordering a drink, picking a spot to sit, and chill out and scroll on your phone or just look at the T.v if they have one. This is why they say live in the present moment. You’re not thinking about things which prevents you from doing things.

Alarming_Disaster_29 · 2025-01-20T05:50:46+00:00

Hey! As someone who loves doing stuff by myself id start with something small. Go to a diner or get lunch by yourself. Go see a movie by yourself! Honestly I love the experience although it’s not for everyone but I think it’ll help once you progress to a bar. Honestly no one’s paying attention to you and you can just do your thing. I’ve had some of the best times at bars by myself and had people initiate chats with me.

epimpstyle · 2025-01-20T11:30:36+00:00

Going to a bar alone and trying to pick up girls is a taboo, it is a challenge. If you have experience in approaching women, it will not be that difficult, but if you think you can go in a social mood and make friends, I doubt it will happen.

Elbynerual · 2025-01-21T08:58:18+00:00

OP, start by going to a chill place. Acknowledge your fear. Put it aside as you're not going there the first couple times to talk to women. You're just going to ease into being comfortable going out alone. Go in, have a drink, be friendly if people talk to you. Maybe watch a game or something. Get home safe.

Now go back to THE SAME PLACE. Do this every weekend. You'll get comfortable doing this much faster than going to different places. The bartenders or waitstaff will start to recognize you, and you'll get decent service if you're tipping correctly (in the US, i assume). Become a regular. The anxiety of going out alone will melt away. Then you can focus on talking to people.

poly_nerdy_panda · 2025-01-21T13:34:35+00:00

just go with friends and hit on women! I thought you can't do "game" mode but really you should be just as silly and dumb with girls you don't know as you are with your friends ... there is a video somewhere on his channel for john anthony lifestyle in which he baggs on his wing man for looking like a troll and they just banter with the girl.. so go out with friends but don't be co-dependent

Intelligent-Roll-763 · 2025-01-22T19:25:15+00:00

Hello .

What exactly is your biggest fear? Do you feel unsafe? Or are you scared of embarrassment?

EetinAintCheetin · 2025-01-20T03:10:54+00:00

By going to the city and bars alone. Do not try to relax, breathe deep, have alcohol or anything else to relax you. Drink a couple of Red Bulls before going and spend the entire night at the same place. Spike your fear and anxiety as much as you can. Walk up to women and tell them “hey, I’m here by myself! I’m looking to make some new friends and btw, if you have coke….i definitely WANT to be your friend”.

Do this until your fear disappears.

Private_Capital1 · 2025-01-21T11:44:41+00:00

Bro friends is impossible and serious women neither . In bars you will find occasional interaction with both sexes but dont expect the guys to throw themselves into the fire for you or the women to fawn over you or even keep in touch after an occasional ONS (if you can get it)

The true human connection is in the country that you are from and want to leave.

Cities are all about transactional , occasional and mostly impersonal. Because there are literally millions of people

Title	How can I overcome my fear of going into the city / bars alone?
Author	DungusIII
Upvotes	2
Comments	21
Date	January 20, 2025 2:51 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1i5gcwm/how_can_i_overcome_my_fear_of_going_into_the_city/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-can-i-overcome-my-fear-of-going-into-the-city.1541640 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541640

Comments