Parental Alienation

Impossible-Union-325 · 2025-02-19T09:31:24+00:00

Parallel parenting, grey rock method, iron clad child arrangement order. Write down and record everything… Create a safe place and enjoy your time with your family, get your daughter some therapy, work on emotions and emotional intelligence. There’s not much else you can do unfortunately

Zealousideal_Try_864 · 2025-02-17T21:24:06+00:00

So...you can't stop this. I mean, I saw what mine did IN my presence so I cannot imagine what happens when I'm not around.

She's going to do what she's going to do. You can try to show cause it, but you're probably just going to waste your time and money. Unless either of you do something completely and grossly negligent...repeatedly....you will be 50/50.

I don't know your exact situation, but based on what you've said, she's not going to accept any blame and she will always be the victim. You are the root of all evil in her eyes and that will probably never change. She's not going to accept the fact that statistically a marriage is a coin toss. She's probably more worried about anger, blame and control than she is about raising your daughter.

So, all that being said, just make your home a safe place for your daughter and don't talk negatively about her mother. Be the chill.

Are you at least in different residences for the separation? In-house is THE WORST.

47omek · 2025-02-17T16:13:21+00:00

Couple of things - First, you can't take things that a 3 year old tells you too personally. They're going to say all kinds of things to test boundaries and try to get a rise out of you. Five minutes later it's "Daddy you're the greatest!" Second, yes the mother is probably saying things to the child that she shouldn't. But for the most part there isn't anything you can do about it and if you bring it up to the ex you're just showing her that it's getting to you and she will ramp it up even further. So for now the best thing to do is just ignore it. It's awesome you have equal parenting time which gives you enough face-to-face time with the child to SHOW her that you're not the monster that mommy makes you out to be. Kids watch what we do SO much more than what we say, make sure your actions counter the ex's manipulation and you'll be fine.

Signal-Dot2326 · 2025-02-17T12:34:45+00:00

Yes almost exactly the same age and what's she was saying, that's ok, you correct the lie and tell the truth to your child, my daughter never says stuff like that anymore

Mammoth-Push-2612 · 2025-02-17T07:26:08+00:00

My wife does not let me take my son out of the house unless she is also present. I cannot decide what to give my son for lunch unless I get permission.

regertsrus · 2025-02-17T05:12:23+00:00

I did and still am dealing with it. I sat on the truth for years. That mommy is a pathological liar and cheat. It all came to a head last august during a most volatile and revealing road trip. My large blended family was attempted to be run off the road by some nut with stolen plates and car. The kids started talking. After they revealed what mommy and her now boytoy who lives with them in my house was saying, i blew up. I revealed a glimpse. Over the next umpteenth false police report and orders of protection which i have proven false, i found out there were more alienation. When i finally presented the truth in court, i was told there is nothing to do because i unilaterally took more time away and the kids are now 50/50. I did this over the years. As i recovered from this liar, and became happier, i took time against her better wishes but with the kids dictating theirs. She never liked this. She hated how i listen to the kids and cut her out. The courts love and encourage coparenting but say nothing about dealing with liars. My story got worse recently in terms of the lies and silver bullet method now with numerous family memebers (her family) defending them selves from the vicious and often maliced lies. The moral here is that your 3 year old is being manipulated with lies and alienation. You can handle it legally. Or you can explain to your child that a person who loves her, should not alienate her from her grammy. Along these lines. Dont alienate mom. But offer moral understand for what is kind and decent. She will eventually know that her loved ones should not trash talk people especially loved ones. Thats how i handled it for years. Eventually all my kids ratted out mommy and her boyfriend Some more than others. I am told to go for custody. I am reluctant for now. I am afraid she will fail if i do and the kids will be affected.

No_Pace2396 · 2025-02-17T04:39:29+00:00

Google Amy Baker Beyond the High Road. It’s an old paper but has practical strategies for countering alienation.

Title	Parental Alienation
Author	Emotional_Bike2699
Upvotes	20
Comments	25
Date	February 17, 2025 4:31 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1irbmec/parental_alienation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/parental-alienation.1544116 https://theredarchive.com/post/1544116

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