How did you secured your finances ?

pk2at · 2025-03-27T17:58:36+00:00

Plenty of ways to secure finances, most of them prior to things going bad 1) Post dated legal separation prior to marriage 2) Prenup prior to marriage 3) Trust prior to marriage 4) Separate financial account in another state post marriage 5) Rent from parents post marriage 6) Gifts to parents/friends post marriage 6) Trust post marriage 7) foreign residence post marriage 8) Online legal separation with no assets disclosed post marriage 9) Strategic divorce where you keep the assets post marriage etc.

There are a bunch of lawyers and feminists roaming online who will tell you how difficult it is avoid 50:50 split. This is all nonsense.

jimsmythee · 2025-03-26T16:52:49+00:00

When I was married to my first wife, every week was a constant struggle to keep our heads above water while tethered to a boat anchor. Her addictions to pills almost cost me everything. Her disasters brought us to bankruptcy court.

After bankruptcy was done, no more credit cards. No more loans. No more spending because she refused to work. Did she clean up her act? Of course not! She had yet another great big DUI crash, this time the kids were in the car when she crashed.

She got out of jail and convicted. $7500 in DUI fines and a $3000 loan to her parents for the DUI atty. Solution? Get a job? Of course not, that's crazy talk! No, she told me that either I could get a second job, or I could borrow the money from my mother to pay for it. I chose neither. Filed for divorce instead.

Divorce took 9 months and that included a trial. I got out! Kept my house and car. $0 alimony. Only thing it cost me was 50% of my 401k.

And since I knew how to live well below my means? Finances fell into place. Her? Not so much. She spent her 401k money in less than a year and had nothing to show for it except for a tax bill to the IRS and the state revenue.

RevolutionaryLaw8854 · 2025-03-26T13:30:11+00:00

A few things will happen.

Most of y’all have wives that spend money without a relationship with reality. Staying married would have resulted in increasing budgets every year.

Well, now your ex is a fixed amount. It makes it infinitely easier to budget. Whatever you’re paying her, it’s a known amount and is the same every month. Yes, it’s going to suck. Yes, your standard of living is going to take a hit for a while.

But, your career will take off. You’ll have less stress and drama in your life. I’d bet, many of you will make much more money going forward.

So, yes it’s going to suck. And yes, it’s going to get better. And I’ll pose it that most of us will be in a BETTER financial position divorced.

gaelorian · 2025-03-26T13:14:57+00:00

It’s going to be a hit if you’re the main breadwinner and she makes zero or far less. No real way of escaping it. Don’t hide assets. That will end up worse for you.

On the plus side you’ll probably spend less after the divorce, believe it or not. Get a good lawyer and try to keep it as amicable as possible.

Title	How did you secured your finances ?
Author	DeepAnt8165
Upvotes	10
Comments	14
Date	March 26, 2025 12:55 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1jkb32f/how_did_you_secured_your_finances/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-did-you-secured-your-finances.1547682 https://theredarchive.com/post/1547682

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