I know, I know.

I (27F) used to be strongly against living with a man before a proposal, but here I am, needing advice.

I have posted before about being in a semi-long-distance relationship with my boyfriend (30M). He has citizenship in another country for tax reasons and because he owns his own company, so he can’t spend all his time in the country where we met.

However, throughout our relationship (one year), he has spent a lot of time here (kind of brushing into a grey area with his tax situation) to be with me. He’s traveled back and forth several times by plane and car (a 6-hour trip) just to spend a few days with me. He’s flown me to visit him twice (where I met all his friends and family) and has taken me on several other trips. He has pursued me with clear intent, introduces me proudly to everyone, and the biggest hurdle in our relationship has always been the time we spend apart.

This past week, he wrapped up a 3-month stay in my city. After a night of drinking, fun, and being very romantic, he told me that life is too short and said he had been thinking about moving together here in a couple of months (even though it would cost him a lot in tax savings) because I’m more important to him, and he wants to be with me. We had previously talked about settling here after the end of the year to better solve his situation. I also have my own living situation I’d like to shift around next year, and I’ve been looking into renting a bigger place on my own.

This man fills me with so much love, and I truly see him as my future husband. I see all the sacrifices he has made, and part of me is ready to say yes to living together. But deep down, I know my personal values are not to live with a boyfriend before engagement. We’re probably about a year or so away from a proposal, realistically.

I don’t want to jeopardize this relationship, but I also want to do what’s best for me. Any advice?