I’ll preface this by saying..if you have anything to add, please do.

At the end of the day, dating is a numbers game. The more women you talk to on a night out, the better your chances are with sleeping with one of them.

A lot of guys get this idea in their head (including myself lately): “I don’t approach.” Never make a move, let women approach you. Problem with this is, you’re going to miss a LOT of opportunities with this mindset.

It’s not inherently in a woman’s nature to approach a man (unless she’s just extremely attracted or desperate). Instead, they’ll give choosing signals (like looking at you, brushing up on you walking past, etc). That’s your indicator to approach.

I get it, and I think it’s an ego thing. You don’t want to get rejected, or feel like you’re not making any progress, because it sucks, makes you question yourself even. However, such as is sales, is dating. The more women you get in front of = higher chances of sleeping with one.

For example: I went to a particular club last year. I was really enjoying the music there. Most of the night, I was in the “mosh” area (with all the high energy mofos). I took a short break and started walking around, and chatted with women. I got (softly) rejected a few times. There was one though that I caught looking at me in the mosh area throughout the night. I decided to make an approach then. We ended up sleeping together for the whole weekend, and even dated briefly after that.

You can be an attractive guy, but if you aren’t putting yourself out there, chances are you’ll just be a fly on the wall. I’m a guy who I’d say gets more indicators of attraction than average, yet I can count on one or two hands how many times I’ve been approached by women (in a capacity that led to potential sex / sex). Most of my sexual encounters & relationships were the result of ME putting effort in to take the first step (assuming she gave attraction indicators, though rarely not the case).

Another thing I’ll add briefly is doing things you enjoy, and being in places that foster the kinds of numbers to need to maximize success.

When you’re in your flow state (working hard, really enjoying the music, working out, etc), you are maximally attractive to women. As such, it’s a good idea to put yourself in environment that you can achieve this flow state.

Finally, take a hard assessment of the area you’re in. Smaller metro areas are much harder than big cities for example. And as with most things in life, a degree of luck is involved as well.

Therefore, don’t be hard on yourself if you go home alone, it’s part of the game, as long as you tried then it’s a success in my book.