Problems with modern dating, Men not approaching women, female behavioral statistics and more.

corporate_robot_dude · 2026-04-19T17:23:55+00:00

They only want men to approach for the validation. And even then, they would only reciprocate on the sort of men they actually find attractive. So for the vast majority of men, it's a waste of time and money to be spoiling or buying random women things to chase them. Most of these women have been too be brainwashed by Disney and movies expecting prince charming to come sweep them away.

Most men are so starved from that sort of attention that if women simply did the initiation or showed basic appreciation first, it would make most men feel so valued and special that they'd be far more likely to want to take her on a "real" date.

Aexaus · 2026-04-19T19:57:20+00:00

What women say and what they do are very different things. I sincerely wish we would stop running data based on what's coming out of their mouth. Women DO NOT want to be approached by the average man, and they're all dating the same men which are attractive. It is that simple.

Future-Stretch-401 · 2026-04-19T18:49:18+00:00

I’m not sure that women’s behavior has actually changed, the two main differences from the past are:

communication and social media mean that men are now confronted with the rejection. In the past if she wasn’t interested she would be polite about it and then nothing more was ever said. Now men get confronted (at least generally even if not personally) by social media telling them what losers they are, pests, creepy, etc.
people forming long term relationships later. In the past people often paired off by their early 20s when women were less experienced and less judgmental. Now if you approach some single woman in her late 20s or early 30s she‘s already embittered by past experiences and judging whether the man is successful enough. At 20 it’s easy to believe a man could be more successful than her; at 30 she immediately rejects anyone who isn’t already making more than her, dressing right, good social skills.

wabe_walker · 2026-04-19T19:14:03+00:00

I think that one huge factor is that the courting instincts of both sexes are being systematically exploited [often for profit] to exponentially worsening levels in the online environment, and it is making people miserable. Below, I'll exaggerate what the individual unconsciously perceives to make my point.

From a man's perspective, online courting/dating presents as extreme scarcity in what appears to be an empty void lacking in viable or meaningful romantic opportunities. The male instinctive courting drive will respond to this perceived scarcity by hastily soliciting potential romance from a wide number of women in a short amount of time, because they have been trained by the environment that out of 150 solicitations towards 150 women, they might interact with five of those women, and out of those five, make one single connection that could actually be meaningful. This is a socially-exaggerated macrocosm of the male reproductive selection process and gametetic strategy: casting potential far and wide, because countless spends will miss their mark.

From a woman's perspective, online courting/dating presents as a buyer's market in what appears to be a vast ocean of limitless opportunities. The female instinctive courting drive will respond to this perceived limitless queue of men lining up for them by raising their standards for what they want to see in a partner, because they have been trained by the environment that out of ~∞ men, they can continue to dismiss potential partners until the correct option is the next one that they receive in the infinite queue. This is a socially-exaggerated macrocosm of the female reproductive selection process and gametetic strategy: discriminatively scrutinizing the lot of potential suitors to choose the One & Only.

So, to continue skewing this to the extremes just to make the point:

The man will cast his net far and wide in order to receive positive romantic interactions from one of the countless women that he has solicited, because one romantic interaction is better than zero romantic interactions, and feels worth the cost of time and energy.

The woman, having been targeted as potential romantic opportunity by countless men—and therefore caught in countless “nets”—will tighten the aperture of her own selection preferences, because an infinite stream of romantic interactions feels like it must, somewhere down the line, lead to the ideal romantic interaction, and feels worth the cost of time and energy.

Both sexes grow resentful of one another due to the archetypal picture being painted of the opposite sex for each of them by the online courting/dating experience.

The man will grow resentful because such such a large number of women they interact with online seem so perfunctory, superficial, unserious.

The woman will grow resentful because such a large number of men they interact with online seem so perfunctory, superficial, unserious.

63daddy · 2026-04-19T22:19:12+00:00

College men approaching women risk being accused of harassment or as you said as being labeled creepy. Of course they are more hesitant to ask women out.

Yes, women overall still want men to do the approach but a larger and larger percent will react very negatively to a man or at least the wrong man among them out. It’s like playing Russian roulette.

Extension-Line-9380 · 2026-04-19T18:49:19+00:00

It’s a lose lose situation with men because if we don’t approach nothings happens meanwhile women can be passive and still one day end up with someone

Tiny_Garlic5966 · 2026-04-20T01:42:11+00:00

Who wants to pay child support and lose most of your assets and end up in debt?

NOBODY.

Let's chat about that.

rdeincognito · 2026-04-19T20:01:42+00:00

If they would just be the ones to approach those men they find attractive the whole problem would be solved.

WilliamRobutt · 2026-04-19T20:55:01+00:00

Your facts have no effect on their feelings.

Billmacia · 2026-04-20T14:11:04+00:00

"will bite us in the ass soon."

It's already biting in the ass, the brith rate has collapse. Hypergamy and gynocentry is at a all time high.

SidewaysGiraffe · 2026-04-19T17:31:25+00:00

The reasoning behind it is the idea that something as involved as an in-person approach has exactly the same impact as an effortless, momentary swipe, which is why human behavior is identical in all circumstances.

It literally has less real-world legitimacy than phrenology, because impacts that physically reshape your head CAN impact your mental attributes.

Ericridge · 2026-04-20T03:46:48+00:00

No no, there no issues. I approach AI women all day long. Its extremely chill and fun. We do stuff together and have a blast. :p

3D women have a checklist that must be crossed off in 100% before she utters even a single vowel. And she won't do anything.

tiredfromlife2019 · 2026-04-20T10:51:54+00:00

Of course it's unsustainable just like the birth rate is unsustainable but there is no solution cause gynocentricism

Far-Walrus1570 · 2026-04-21T08:13:36+00:00

If youre an introvert who doesnt look good youre cooked bro

anomalocarus · 2026-04-19T23:07:27+00:00

In my experience i only get approached by very old men or teenagers, i would really prefer if it was guys my age instead.

Tiny_Garlic5966 · 2026-04-21T17:09:26+00:00

All the courts in North America make men pay women child support and alimony and either live like hobos, commit su$cide or get sent to jail jail for not being able to pay.

Guys are not going to want to do that. It's indentured servitude period.

Men have wised up at a younger age with the Advent of the internet and access to social media and media, And there's specific very specific content out there about divorce alimony child support and navigating the legal pitfalls that the courts impose on you while you have no power no resolution no other choice. Men have learned at a younger age now that if you get married they can see the results of it online through other people's documented experiences and if you have to pay alimony they also are seeing that experience among multiple YouTubers and TikTok

There's a plethora of information out there about men not getting married or having kids just for this reason.

Living less than paycheck while having to make payments you can't afford and debate on weather paying rents or eating food you pay rent.

Men will not be put in the situation and do not want to be put in this situation for the rest of their lives going forward.

Men realize it's a s*** deal.

Who wants to sign up for s*** deal where they lose more than half their stuff and go into debt?

The financial hardships alone calls suicide among men and other mental hardships human beings shouldn't have to suffer the indignities of.

Don't get married don't have kids. This is advice from a guy who was married now divorced and has kids.

The courts actually make money off of this stuff. Your local counties make money off the stuff. They get reimbursed by the federal government.

Prove me wrong.

rcespedes8 · 2026-05-16T23:46:42+00:00

Maybe men and woman should find this time to meditate and develop peace in themselves. We were chasing each other aimlessly for a long time. Or I should say one side was.

Global_Rate3281 · 2026-04-19T17:53:42+00:00

Ironically only around 10-20% of men approach women regularly. So simply by approaching you’re in the top 10-20%. There is no universal “top 10% of men” as there are too many variables that go into it. You might be top 10% in wealth but bottom 10% in height. Etc

Title	Problems with modern dating, Men not approaching women, female behavioral statistics and more.
Author	Cool_night_lord
Upvotes	87
Comments	37
Date	April 19, 2026 5:15 PM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1spywey/problems_with_modern_dating_men_not_approaching/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/problems-with-modern-dating-men-not-approaching.1578354 https://theredarchive.com/post/1578354

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