I’m an ugly 39M guy and women are getting vindictive towards me for declining to be their backup plan.

Yamcha-is-Life · 2026-06-22T01:00:08+00:00

You're doing the right thing. I've had the same situation and it's very telling when they start making up things about you. You dodged a bullet

Ericridge · 2026-06-22T00:47:13+00:00

Well done. Those women was going to divorce rape you after a year or two anyways and force you into child support payments. Even more risky when they already have children from EXs.

SearchCapital7719 · 2026-06-22T00:22:04+00:00

In my experience, women don't take rejection well. I don't know if its because they aren't used to being the one rejected instead of the one dishing it out...or if its just some type of crushing blow to her self esteem.

Winston-_-Wolf · 2026-06-22T00:56:37+00:00

You're a true king, don't fall for that trap
Most Women do are childish, they can't take rejection, think they are all 5+/10
Don't know how to recognise their mistake and don't even think about appology
Most lack empathy and have narcissistic behaviour, everything you have noticed so far
It instantly make sense when you replace them with children, because it's the way they act, caring about nothing except their self interest
And i say that from a "better than avg" looking PoV. (For me it's a bit different, they come for the outside without accepting the inside) Still very shallow

substance_dualism · 2026-06-22T02:22:50+00:00

A guy in his 40s with no ring gets a lot of attention, especially if you get serious and work on yourself.

It isn't socially acceptable to say "no single moms or party girl burnouts" for some reason...

Drakin5 · 2026-06-22T00:57:54+00:00

Not really much a surprise there.

Despite that you claim that you are ugly, they see you as a potential ATM paypig because of your career and assets you own, aka the security and stability that you can provide.

I have had 2 women so far accuse me of horrible things even though I never interacted with them in a non professional way. No dates, no anything yet these women completely fabricated stories up about our interactions, interactions that we never had.

One was completely caught lying specifically with a text saying “a guy like him needs to get punished thinking he can say no.”

There's a reason why gold digger is a stereotype among women, but never men. Covetousness is one helluva drug among women.

brainzhurtin · 2026-06-22T01:07:02+00:00

One was completely caught lying specifically with a text saying “a guy like him needs to get punished thinking he can say no.”

If that were me, and had access to it, I'd show that to the cops.

syro23 · 2026-06-22T01:18:16+00:00

Lie to these women when you can. Say you are happily married or have a serious girlfriend or whatever. Especially if it is a professional relationship.

creamer143 · 2026-06-22T01:16:29+00:00

Are these women you work with or something? Friends of friends? How do they know you?

Comfortable_Change_6 · 2026-06-22T01:41:33+00:00

it used to be women who say that they fear rejecting men for bad retaliation.

oh, how the turn tables--when they rollerskate into the wall.

IaMtHel00phole · 2026-06-22T02:53:27+00:00

Yes. I am very similar in terms of not settling. I'd rather be alone than miserable with someone. In my experience women cannot stand rejection. Because they've never experienced it. I've had some women turn very hateful towards me because of rejection. Not to the extent you're receiving fortunately. Do you work with them? How are they able to try to ruin you financially or legally?

Dan-Man · 2026-06-22T00:42:29+00:00

Thank you for the daily red pill bro.

Who are these women and what circumstances do they approach you?

CharacterNo3115 · 2026-06-22T03:24:38+00:00

Many women cannot deal with rejection. Most over state their attractiveness and appeal. Many weaponise and commoditise sex. When you don’t show interest or don’t chase they get mean. Now let me clear - not all women. Just like not all men are pigs or potential rapists. You just need to be selective and find the one worth investing time in.

lonelysad1989 · 2026-06-22T02:15:53+00:00

You should expose them if you're innocent

Shadowcreature65 · 2026-06-22T05:54:56+00:00

Women have no experience with rejection, so they lose their shit when it happens. They want to be the prize.

Tomato_Joker · 2026-06-22T05:06:54+00:00

Ironic how they mock men for getting rejected yet they cannot handle rejection themselves. Nothing shatters their ego more than getting rejected by an ugly man.

WilliamRobutt · 2026-06-22T06:09:54+00:00

I am getting very bothered by this childish mentality. It’s women my age specifically.

For all the bullshit about women maturing faster and being smarter than men, in reality they are almost all stunted at a level of high school maturity at beat.

Charybd1ss · 2026-06-22T04:19:58+00:00

Say you're gay and stay single and enjoy your Life. Don't enter the trap of marriage

SgtSplacker · 2026-06-22T04:51:20+00:00

I've had this happen a couple times with women i have shown interest in. They come back after they have been knocked up or gained weight. Have to be really careful with these girls. They know how to use the legal system to bleed you. Keep proof of everything and stay away. Absolutely to time alone with these girls. They are easy, and the ultimate danger to your resources. There is no love for you there.

rsxstock · 2026-06-22T06:41:59+00:00

make sure you document everything just in case

wmetzle2 · 2026-06-22T01:37:29+00:00

As the great Bernie Mac said...FUCK EM!

Current_Finding_4066 · 2026-06-22T06:00:08+00:00

Now you can date hotties half your age, why settle on washed up women your age? Of course, you if you do not feel the need, being single is great too.

humble_cyrus · 2026-06-22T05:06:42+00:00

I'm curious: 1. Are these women in your workplace or you work with professionally? 2. If so, can you approach HR about the workplace? I know if a man claims "hostile work environment" they won't take it seriously, but I think you're on solid ground. I'd be leery of giving out personal information to them.

merv1985 · 2026-06-22T06:07:17+00:00

If you think about it the women approaching you are actually going back to their default settings.

flame_badger · 2026-06-22T04:25:32+00:00

"Ugly" is relative bro. Think of all the superfical women who get plastic surgery. Are they still ugly afterwards? Superficially not as ugly, but if they are ugly on the inside or have toxic personalities, then no amount of cosmetics or surgery is going to fix that.

We all get old, and stop being as good looking as when we were young, but someone who is beautiful inside and of good character ages far better than someone ugly on the inside.

ANewCleanSlate · 2026-06-22T02:18:47+00:00

This sounds suspicious

rjm101 · 2026-06-22T06:55:18+00:00

Don't even interact with the ones that you think could be trouble and consider whether you can adjust your surroundings. If you don't want the hassle consider not outright rejecting them but rather just being distant in a more subtle way.

Redkg · 2026-06-22T06:56:20+00:00

I think I need to y

Humble-Business6409 · 2026-06-22T07:19:29+00:00

Why can’t women take no for an answer? This happened because female entitlement is so normalised that trying to destroy a man’s reputation because he rejected her is not seen as a problem

Daytona_675 · 2026-06-22T07:31:57+00:00

never reject them just endlessly lead them on and make up excuses to not hang out

pprstrt · 2026-06-22T07:32:46+00:00

Yes, as women age they lose access to the hotter men, their internal clock starts ticking louder, and they settle.

That said, it can be hard to understand as a guy, but women really are less concerned/distracted with how a man objectively looks. His attraction can provide validation, indicate health, and bode well for her children; sure; but as part of a bigger picture; women pay more attention and are more concerned with what he can provide than what he looks like. More important than his looks are his money, his social proof, his friends and family, his health, his humor/intelligence, and to an extent his principles.
You are at an age where your value is significantly higher than that of women your age. You should get back into the dating game, I think you'd be pleasantly surprised.

wyng369 · 2026-06-22T03:02:20+00:00

Just say you are gay. They might be more forgiving that way. Knowing that they never had a chance.

adam-l · 2026-06-22T04:36:50+00:00

Try to give them a bit of plausible deniability. A direct "no" is a hit to their self-esteem. It does feel good (for us), but leads to them acting the way you describe.

"I'm focusing on (this irrelevant thing) right now, and it takes up all of my time and energy" works much better with females than "No".

watchguy95820 · 2026-06-22T00:34:58+00:00

How do you know you are a backup?

B3owul7 · 2026-06-22T00:31:03+00:00

Sounds far fetched, to be honest.

Like what did they ask you to get a reply like "Thank you but I am going to decline"?

"Hey you've got a good career and money, will you marry me?" - "Thank you, but I am going to decline."

SuperRoseEli29 · 2026-06-22T05:25:26+00:00

This subreddit is so goofy

Redsquirreltree · 2026-06-22T02:21:04+00:00

Perhaps they are looking for someone with a better personality?

I mean, how do you know it is just your resources they want?

Lonely-Sky-2969 · 2026-06-22T04:35:37+00:00

If you're that rich, get plastic surgery.

Title	I’m an ugly 39M guy and women are getting vindictive towards me for declining to be their backup plan.
Author	StarsH20Time
Upvotes	337
Comments	61
Date	June 22, 2026 12:17 AM UTC (4 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1uc5k8g/im_an_ugly_39m_guy_and_women_are_getting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/im-an-ugly-39m-guy-and-women-are-getting.1583347 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583347

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