LTR meets new guy at bar. He invites her to lunch this weekend. How do I respond?

WolfenSatyr · 2016-01-05T20:03:40+00:00

If my gf did that i'd tell her if she wants to date other guys she can leave and I'll be just fine without her. I'd put my foot down. It's completely disrespectful and I could do better with another girl that does respect me.

rurpe · 2016-01-05T20:16:28+00:00

You need to nuke this.

her: "he asked me out to lunch"

you: "go for it, we aren't really exclusive and I'm not the jealous type"

Archwinger · 2016-01-05T20:46:05+00:00

Don't try to save the relationship. It's already done. But you don't need to give her drama and closure and degrade yourself by making a scene. Just keep fucking her (wrap your dick), and start fucking other women. Downgrade her to plate, but don't say anything about it. No need to have a conversation about something that's already obviously true for both of you.

Rasalom72 · 2016-01-05T19:54:18+00:00

LTR at 6 months is a joke... but, you can flip it on her and BECAUSE SHE ASKED if you're okay with it... just ask her "Would you be okay if I went out "for lunch" with a cute girl I met at the bar?"

If she says yes, then you have your answer and your next step (go find chicks at the bar). If she says no, then even her hamster should know it's a bad idea.

NazoXIII · 2016-01-05T19:50:47+00:00

She's shopping around, bro, I'd suggest you do the same.

6 months into an LTR and shes giving her number out at bars? If that doesn't make you laugh a little..

HeadingRed · 2016-01-05T22:33:22+00:00

Establish a dominant frame - have dinner with him on Friday and bang him before she does.

trpdgc · 2016-01-05T20:28:07+00:00

You do care, and you know exactly how you feel about this. There's a tendency around here to pretend men don't feel, but we do. Bottom line this is bullshit, line up some pussy right now and get the fuck out.

DoubleTappp · 2016-01-05T20:25:36+00:00

Bwahahaha.......hahahahahahha.......hahahaha

ok, ok, I'm good now.

Drop her so fast she breaks. That shit is over bro.

2016-01-05T21:09:02+00:00

So, not only she gives her number while being in an LTR, but also she openly acknowledges the fact that this guy is obviously trying to fuck her, and then proceeds to accept a lunch invitation from him?

Go with hard hard dread if you want to, but I'd say next her ass.

1NV0K3R · 2016-01-05T19:50:27+00:00

So my LTR

Already losing.

She gave him her number

Stellar girl.

"Wow this guy really wants to fuck me"

Every guy wants to fuck you hun. Common jealousy ploy.

today she texts me saying that he invited her to lunch this weekend and that he's funny blah blah

She's trying really hard.

How do I approach this in a way that doesn't put me at risk of getting cucked

No idea, she seems like the kind of girl who'd cuck you if opportunity presented itself regardless of what you did.

I should put my foot down.

Too late for that. Go hang out with your bros and get some strange.

empatheticapathetic · 2016-01-06T00:11:59+00:00

A lot of people are saying 'plate' her but the amount of disrespect she has openly shown you, she doesn't deserve to be your plate.

Man this post is depressing. It's like you came in knowing the answer to the question you had, but you hoped against hope that maybe someone would say something that kind of justified her behaviour. But no, a unanimous "tell her to GTFO" ensues instead, which was always the expected answer. Bitch can't even stick around for 6+ months? She's done you a favour by telling/asking you instead of just going behind your back. You have the power to end it first, and that is really the only option. Sorry bro

soadaa · 2016-01-05T22:03:18+00:00

At 6 months I think this is someone you don't want as a ltr. Big red flag and don't let her being open and honest (as opposed to just fucking this guy without telling you) as a good thing. It's just an ASD by telling you

Letsbeserioushere · 2016-01-05T22:49:21+00:00

Tell her to go, and have a great time.

If she goes, lay on an insane amount of dread and basically demote her, irrevocably, from girlfriend to plate. Immediately start going out and hitting on women, and going home with them.

What she's doing is not ok for a relationship. Don't tell her that, but SHOW it to her with indifference and pursuing you're own interests.

imthemanyesiam · 2016-01-05T23:14:32+00:00

Tell her u have a cuckold fetish

2016-01-06T03:25:53+00:00

It doesn't really matter now, she peaked and as far as you're concerned its all downhill from here.

Invest nothing more in her. You are free to keep fucking but don't waste any time or money anymore

2016-01-06T00:34:28+00:00

Respond with, "I'm disappointed with you" and go no contact for a few days. Don't answer her phone calls. Don't even with with a short, "k" text.

You are disappointed with her and it's the truth. Letting her know will not put you in a weak position. Letting her know this while still validating her is putting you in a weak position. If she knows you're disappointed with her and knows you're willing to walk when she acts like this, then she won't be doing it again. Her hamster will go from, "lol that's funny"; to "i thought you cared about me. fuck it, I'm going on this date."; and finally ending with, "babe, I'm sorry. I realized I was acting stupid and don't want to lose you." At this point in time you can respond to her and invite her over. Don't talk about what happened. Your actions will have already spoken for you. Women like to test boundaries. It's unfortunate, but it's true.

If you say the, "I'm disappointed with you" text and she still goes out on the date... well, there is literally nothing you could have done anyways and you found out the type of girl you're dealing with.

GunnarX · 2016-01-05T21:47:52+00:00

I would say "go and fuck his brains out". If she does, hard next. If she doesn't.... hard next any way. But you have to act like you don't care.

FrameWalker · 2016-01-05T21:00:20+00:00

I'd go no contact for 10 days. Punishment for extreme disrespect. Then let her beg to come back and use as plate only. Requires lots of discipline but if your feelings are strong hard next instead. If you accept this disrespect it will eat away at you.

Title	LTR meets new guy at bar. He invites her to lunch this weekend. How do I respond?
Author	asktrphelp795
Upvotes	3
Comments	27
Date	January 5, 2016 7:45 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3zlsvf/ltr_meets_new_guy_at_bar_he_invites_her_to_lunch/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-meets-new-guy-at-bar-he-invites-her-to-lunch.158835 https://theredarchive.com/post/158835

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