Nostalgia Hitting Hard

ImmortalZ0dd · 2021-04-11T12:44:24+00:00

I'm 34, recently divorced, and also have had some nostalgia for past times. My advice to you would be to focus on yourself. Do things that improve your life and make you happy. Focus on a hobby. Focus on your health. Focus completely on yourself whether it's your career or just random interests. Your life will improve as you grow into being a better man.

CoachOcelot · 2021-04-11T14:16:59+00:00

You need something to look forward to; you need goals; you need targets and evidence you're hitting those targets, every so often; you need the correct people around you.

You had these (correct, relatively speaking for the time and age) when you were younger. Figure them out for your 34 year old self and pursue them.

familiarfolly · 2021-04-11T12:23:09+00:00

seems to me like you don’t have a mission or goals.

i also don’t sense “i lift + do explosive workouts” energy from your writing at all

Thinkingard · 2021-04-11T13:57:10+00:00

Try writing about your experiences. Sometimes, I find when I write about memories that have been recurring in my mind or developing melancholy, writing it down helps resolve, or bring closure, to the thoughts and they don't come on so strongly again.

Obviously you have a powerful sense of loss over how good life was then compared to now. Try some cognitive behavioral therapy if your thoughts keep coming up and putting you in a funk.

paizk · 2021-04-11T11:12:37+00:00

Figure out how to go back overseas.

I know a dude past 40 who still cold approches and smashes hot early 20s thotties on the regular. Hanging out and chasing tail with him and his boys showed me that this shit really doesn't end until you want it to.

b1nkh4x0r · 2021-04-11T14:59:11+00:00

Dude, I turn 32 soon and I am the same. I spent years abroad for study and work and now I'm in a nostalgic rut as well. Women were plentiful, I had a great time now I feel a bit jaded and seem to have lost optimism.

You just ended a long relationship so you're bound to be feeling off. On top of that, we are going through a general shit show. When society opens up again it'll be a breath of fresh air. Remember we have time. You're good.

-Bran- · 2021-04-11T15:52:36+00:00

In order to avoid reveling in the past and worry of the future you need to be present.

My personal prescription for this is 20-30 min mediation daily, indoor rock climbing and Brazilian jiu jitsu. The last two require mental and physical prowess and keep you fully engaged in the present. They also bring you two new communities of people.

EHPimpNamedSlickBack · 2021-04-11T21:08:38+00:00

I too get extremely nostalgic sometimes so I know how you feel. At the end of the day you gotta realize that those days have already happened, but you still have the power to give yourself even better days ahead provided you do the work.

TheEndTrend · 2021-04-11T15:07:53+00:00

I’m taking a month long break from drinking and it’s helping me a lot.

throwmrwaway · 2021-04-11T16:44:42+00:00

i can relate even though i'm only 22, but when i get these feelings i always remember a saying ''a person with no future tends to live in his past''...

IHaveSalesQuestions · 2021-04-11T19:16:42+00:00

36 here and going through the same thing. I figured it come down to one thing. In my mid 20’s I had focus. I was unshakable. No one could steer me off the path I was carving out for myself. I had a mission. I wasn’t phased by anything.

I’m currently trying to replicate some of that while expanding on it with what I’ve learned over the past decade. I truly believe a man is the happiest when he’s set a true goal and sets out on his mission to attain it. A goal that pushes you to be better every day. Chipping away at it daily. Marking off progress. Setting new goals and achieving them. Nothing else matters. Constant growth and progress. Mix in some fucking and good times with buddies and family and you’re golden.

failingtheturingtest · 2021-04-11T21:14:01+00:00

Nostalgia is you worrying you won't get that back.

Throughout my life I've repeatedly thought my best sex and most exciting social experiences were behind me. Usually towards the end or at the end of a relationship. Then when I pull my head out of it, get off my arse and work harder, go and do things that make me happy, I end up having more fun and better sex than ever before.

Your life just gets better when you work for it. The only thing you will miss is having more time to do it all over again.

Get fit, get hungry, get what you want. You'll have time to reminisce when St Peter is asking you all about it at the pearly gates.

scissor_me_timbers00 · 2021-04-11T21:18:25+00:00

Cant help you man. My formative years went completely wrong and left me profoundly depressed and confused. The upside is now in my 30s I’m completely forward looking and have none of the nostalgia problems you do. Although it is sometimes hard to see some super hot 22 year old girl with some boyish dork and know that I missed out on that. And nowadays I can’t relate to Gen z at all so I can really only hookup w 25 and up.

Anyway about your concern man. Life is about growth. Focus on growth and forward motion and accept what’s past is past.

2021-04-12T01:53:29+00:00

I haven't experienced nostalgia in my life.

If you're continually improving yourself you shouldn't experience any.

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2021-04-11T12:28:43+00:00

Because at 34 you couldn't just go back to do studies at the same place where this fantastic life was?? Whats the real question here? how do we solve your fun for you?

throwaway181829393 · 2021-04-11T11:16:49+00:00

Man im 18 and i get insanely nostalgic about the first 2 years in highschool.

Shit... it really is all downhill from here... :/

Title	Nostalgia Hitting Hard
Author	b1nkh4x0r
Upvotes	64
Comments	42
Date	April 11, 2021 10:22 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/mookhm/nostalgia-hitting-hard/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/nostalgia-hitting-hard.1598565 https://theredarchive.com/post/1598565

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