You guys have been a tremendous help. Thought I'd give a slight update to my shit storm which you can find here.  

[What not to do] (https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3poq1d/main_events_long_overdue_victim_puke_warning/)

 

Wife still watches newborn, gets no sleep during the week. So that adds to an especially terrible mood plus I suspect she has postpartum depression from her high and low mood swings.

 

I work from home, in the middle of a telephone conference. She knocks on the door which, she knows not to bother me at work unless it's dire. I get startled and answer, "Yeah?" No terrible tone in it, simple question. She doesn't come in. So I say, "come in." She just wanted to let me that her and her parents are leaving to go to lunch. She gives me shit about how I answered when she knocked, I immediately disengage as I'm at work. Normally, she knows not to cross that line - work.

 

After work, I can see she's in a shitty mood. Her parents are gone, not sure why she acts like a princess with them and then focuses all her hate on me. It's irritating b/c I know she's capable of being nice.  

I want to take my son on a walk in the stroller, i say, 'you're welcome to come.' I was hoping she'd say no but either way it wouldn't bother me. OI. So on our walk she's quiet. I try to make chit chat and light conversation. Not much banter, she's moody. So I do make a mistake on asking 'why so quiet.' So she goes straight for the jugular. She brings up separating again. So I just stay on point and become a broken record. Paraphrased, "I love you both, I don't want to separate. If you want a divorce, you have to do it, I can't be responsible for that." credit for that goes to /rasalom72, thanks.
 

So my lovely wife, what does she do? She tries to hit me where it hurts. She goes after my insecurities. Oh, how quaint. 'I don't love you.' I just repeat what I said before. So she escalates that statement. 'We are never having sex again.' That hurt but I think, meh, we're not having sex now. I just hit the broken record again. She tries to trip me up with scenarios on if she leaves then what. I messed up a little. But I quickly corrected myself which she gave me shit for that. I had thought, if she would abandon us. Which I said, "i'd probably divorce you." But I realized what she meant, as it relates to separation not abandonment. This is where she showed her ass, 'Oh so you said that to hurt me.' So I'm thinking, 'you want a divorce, why would me giving you one hurt you.' Anyway, I just hit the broken record. She then mentions the stuff earlier that day on how I answered the door. So I'm like, 'Oh, that's what this is about.' She said, no. But that's what set her into a tizzy. So I see this becoming diminishing returns and I disengage, we're far from home so I can't simply walk away. So I say, 'I'm done with this conversation, I'm going to enjoy the weather and the walk.'
So this is a pretty good example of doing it right.
 

Of course, me being me, I fuck up later that night and engage her hamster but I quickly abort that and we've had an okay couple of days.

 

EDIT: forgot to mention that she got so frustrated that she called me an 'asshole'. I was amused by it.