pastor leaving church, rp career advice sought

RPAlternate42 · 2015-07-16T18:59:48+00:00

Red Pill Sexual Strategy

I want to address a misconception you seem to have about RP:

Sexual strategy is the main purpose of this sub , not because it results in sex, but because women make decisions regarding relationships from a place of emotion and those emotions (towards you) are derived from a place of sexual power.

If she thinks she controls the sex and you let her, then you let her control the relationship. The moment you stop responding to her control of sex is the moment she realizes that she no longer has any power at all. We call this frame; maintaining our own strength and control in spite of her attempts.

Since how we present ourselves physically, mentally, and verbally is a direct reflection of how she perceives our frame and since those things influence how we present our frame, maintaining mind, body, and presence are the keys to maintaining control over ourselves. Once we can control ourselves, no on can control us. this makes us strong.

Strong males are invested little in women and women know this; your wife knows this. Once you are strong and alpha (to her) she will automatically take the position that you are out of her control and are very likely to pursue other options (hamstering.)

Her method for making sure you don't pursue other options is to have sex with you (mate-retention.) When we have sex with her, we are usually more amenable to being around her, but a strong alpha male will not disregard poor behavior because he had sex 8 hours ago, so eventually she learns that not only is sex necessary to keep her husband around, but being submissive and feminine are required to.

And no matter what she does, be it withhold sex, be a harpy, try to fight for dominant position in the relationship, cheat on you, or leave you, the alpha male isn't fazed because his strong frame allows him the ability to find other women quickly (abundance mentality) and to not care what she does (Outcome Independence.) As long as you are the best (but always improving) you that you can be, then you can't care what she thinks about you.

Why she simultaneously maintains the notions that withholding sex controls the relationship and giving sex controls the relationship we'll never really know... but the most common answer is: because hamster.

Your New Secular Life

I say this because it is post-pastoral.

Pastors, in my experience, all seem to be college graduates. most of the time the college is a parochial school that streamlines the man into the pastoral position. Most of the ones I've met seem to have a degree(s) in something along the lines of therapy or counseling. I don't know if this is the case for you.

This may be a good choice of new career for you because, as I understand your "job description" most of it is guiding and helping people through some kind of issues (size notwithstanding.)

Ever Consider Writing?

Almost all Marriage Help books I've seen have been penned by some Christian leadership person... this leads these books to be Christian-marriage-centric. Pre-RP... none of these would have worked for me because I am an Atheist. Strip out the Christian language and you might have a good book, but I'd never know because basing the advice on scripture takes out about have the book.

I am acquainted with he very rigorous applications of marriage from a fundamental Christian standpoint... but all of these "Marriage Help" books that take the Christian slant are all based in feelings and helping her. Many of the examples the authors give about how a parishioner of theirs had a problem and he solved it seem to be written too happily and to like a parable where he the hero (he) wins no matter what.

The only one that helped is MMSLP because it was a realistic view of male-female relationships and wasn't faith-based.

I mention books because you have to not-common position of being a pastor who is also RP. You have the unique ability to tailor a Christian marriage message to also be RP. You have the even more unique position of being able to write an RP marriage book without the Christian slant but being written by a pastor. Non-religious RP guys would read it because RP, and Christian men would read it because you're a pastor.

So, perhaps you should spend these next months absorbing as much RP info and knowledge as you can, apply it against marriages you've seen in your work, against your own marriage (objectively) and get to coming up with an easily-digestible book.

But if Writing isn't Your Thing

Do you have a degree in anything?
Do you hold certifications in anything?
Do you have a professional network?
Have you specialized anything (beyond pastoral-specific work.)
Do you have work experience outside of pastoral work.

These are the things you need to have to be mildly successful.

Use SMART Goals to identify options, narrow those options down to your top three favorites, then apply what resources and time you have against those options to pick the best one. At this stage in your life you need to be focusing on something.

Good luck.

In the meantime: Get a hobby, build something, and lift!

OzzyF · 2015-07-16T19:28:32+00:00

Have you considered financial services sales? You have an entire congregation who looked up to you for spiritual advice you can leverage those relationships to give financial advice. You work your own hours and deal with people you like. You still get to be out in the community and you still get to develop important lifelong relationships with others. Not only that but if you are dealing with products such as mutual funds, life insurance, income annuities, long term care planning for elders you can have a huge positive impact on peoples lives.

awyden · 2015-07-16T18:31:25+00:00

do you have an M.Div? what was your undergrad in?

just so you know you arn't alone. I got married and went to seminary. a year and a half in and I realized it wasn't for me. Made me feel like a failure, but i sucked that right up, moved back to our home city, did an unpaid internship while i waited tables, got my first full time job in IT field, and went from starting salary of 45k to 61k in two years. its not impossible.

Jessie_James · 2015-07-16T19:46:57+00:00

My father is a fund raiser. If you do it well, and I mean really fucking well, and can get people to write big checks, you will be very happy. Can you follow an education path to that goal? I'd consider doing that if my current career gets boring. He enjoys it a lot, meets a lot of interesting people, gets to travel, and is highly sought after by companies.

Throwawaydontdox · 2015-07-16T20:17:38+00:00

The book you want to read is Sell or Be Sold by Grant Cardone.

IanIronwood · 2015-07-16T22:17:41+00:00

You're actually not the first soon-to-be-former pastor I've counselled, believe it or not. Dixie is a hard place to make an easy living as a pastor.

However, I think you're in good shape. I would recommend looking into non-profit administration and fundraising, particularly involving some medical or disease-related charity, with your background. You won't get "rich", but some of those positions can segue into much more lucrative positions with medical-oriented companies, if you play your cards right. If your forte is networking, not administrative, the fundraising side is for you. Learn how to write grants, hold conferences, and throw fundraisers and you're golden. Spend two years developing industry contracts while you do that, and when the inevitable medical marketing position comes available, you'll be perfectly positioned. Central Florida is a hot-bed of medical issues, thanks to the retirees, and it's a favorite destination for physicians, professionals, and paraprofessionals in the industry. Learn Spanish - right now. And emphasize your Southern approach to hospitality and friendliness on your resume. Be sure to pimp your contacts (no pun intended) in the church organization to get your start. But non-profits are constantly looking for decent people that can perform, because the really good ones quickly leave non-profit work for money.

thisisme0007 · 2015-07-16T19:14:35+00:00

Try listening to a few episodes of eofire.com and especially the last interview question which is :

If you were taken to a world exactly like this one but you knew no one, your food and shelter were taken care of and all you had was $500 and a laptop what would you do in the next 7 days?

RPAlternate42 · 2015-07-16T23:55:15+00:00

-I have a B.S. in a social science and a Master of Divinity (both extremely marketable and sought after degrees)

Consider teaching. You and BPP can corner the market in RP-slanted social sciences.

marxistbacon · 2015-07-16T21:59:16+00:00

I hear you can make pretty good money working in porn :-)

But seriously, I'm not sure there are really RP-centric jobs out there short of being a "subversive" marriage counsellor/therapist. Instead, use your knowledge that You Are In Charge to make sure you own this transition in your life as much as possible. Plan your strategy, research, expect for finances to fall short and make contingency plans. Know as much as possible about wherever you will be going beforehand. Spend some time really getting a handle on your personal finances (/r/personalfinance has some good info). And you mentioned you're bad at administrative tasks - now that you have some free time, figure out why you believe that, and work on improving yourself accordingly. Good luck.

The_Litz · 2015-07-16T20:29:05+00:00

Life coaching. Your communication skills will come in handy plus you have flexibility

enfier · 2015-07-16T22:06:09+00:00

My career advice is this. First, don't start with what you have to offer, start with what the world needs. Then see if you have skills that might match those needs.

Some of the things you are looking for like being around good coworkers, being your own boss, not on the computer, light on administrative tasks may be difficult to achieve in a new career field with zero experience. Those are often the types of things that you get when you are really good at what you do.

The best paying jobs are difficult to do, are perceived as unpleasant and are in great demand.

Some things that you might be good at: Sales, Mortuary Manager, working with the elderly, teaching.

[deleted] · 2015-07-17T01:15:14+00:00

Florida needs health care professionals. Id look into becoming a PA or something that takes less then 3 years of training and school

jerry_rigger · 2015-07-17T06:41:24+00:00

Life coaching and marriage counseling perhaps?

strategos_autokrator · 2015-07-17T07:08:32+00:00

Read No More Mr. Nice Guy. The author used to be a pastor as well, and discusses a lot more than just sexual strategy (which is the focus of this sub).

Moldy_Gecko · 2015-07-17T10:00:53+00:00

If you are moving to a Rich area, look at being a life coach. I know It's a weird, quack like job, but you're more qualified than most and they can make stupid money. Also, if you want to go into IT (good money and always will be necessary), use this time to study for security+. Also, try USAjobs,gov . It's the public field, but easy to get into, potential travel and good retirement. The tone of your post, I can't tell if you were the best or worst pastor.

Title	pastor leaving church, rp career advice sought
Author	Throwawaydontdox
Upvotes	9
Comments	39
Date	July 16, 2015 6:24 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3dj6o2/pastor_leaving_church_rp_career_advice_sought/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/pastor-leaving-church-rp-career-advice-sought.201445 https://theredarchive.com/post/201445

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Red Pill Sexual Strategy

Your New Secular Life

Ever Consider Writing?

But if Writing isn't Your Thing