You may find yourself... calling this victim puke. And you may ask yourself, has he done the work?

My sense is, there is always more work to be done, but without question, there is much work there.

But I am at a point - and just endured a specific action - that makes me wonder if I am in a totally different place with this situation, than just 'my wife won't fuck me" or "my wife is being a bitch, how can i make her stop?"

My latest/ongoing question marks around my marriage are, am I trying to apply RP tactics to a wholly different arena of psychological depression.

We're at one year of the pills (Zoloft) with which she had a previous history years ago. They've helped stabilise somewhat, but they're definitely not a 'cure' nor does she seem to really desire a cure, just an avoidance of whatever issues she's grappling with (and I have asked and probed and supported).

Tonight was a curl-up, lights-out in bed with not a single word or good night, let alone an affectionate peck let alone anything else. That's happened often, and that's OK, it's just tonight was, yep, my birthday. You can't tell me AWALT on that one.

My question that I'm Asking Married Red Pill is: am i really dealing with something where striving for even more leadership, lifting more, gaming more, side-barring more ... having done all that, and hard ... is that really what you'd suggest is going on here.

Is that a wife who 'just isn't attracted to me?" Is it victim-y puking by questioning if I need to think about a whole new re-think about our entire life?

If I'm wallowing, and you can see something I can't or won't - I'll look at it again. I'm not asking for a leave pass, I am willingly raising my hand to say, if I am being so blind about the fix on this one, please slap me in the eyeballs as hard as needed to see my way through on this one. Because at the moment, I sure as fuck cannot see how to move forward, at all.

Thanks.