TheRedArchive needs help
With 700,000+ posts and 16,000,000+ comments archived, and new Red Pill content being added every week, keeping TheRedArchive alive and discoverable to everyone is starting to become very costly. As a 20-year-old student who just moved out and is living independently for the first time, keeping TheRedArchive alive is beginning to cost me much more than I thought.

Therefore, if you appreciate the website, have gained a lot of knowledge and insight from it, and want to show your appreciation, you can do so by donating any amount that you want via the options below. The money will be used on the expensive monthly host bill and any future maintenance of the website.
Thank you, and I wish you all a successful 2021 and a good luck with achieving your goals and dreams!

Best, /u/dream-hunter

How does a young, inexperienced guy effectively absorb and utilize information on this sub without getting overwhelmed and overly analytical about every little thing.

Reddit View
March 20, 2019
89 upvotes

For context, Im a 19 yr old guy with mild social anxiety and never been great with women. I discovered this sub about a year ago, i've read the sidebar and have continued to casually read posts on this sub every now and then to try to gain as much uselful information as possible.

The past year I think ive done a decent job of improving my smv through dressing better, excercising/working out more, taking care of things like my skin/face better, putting more effort into things like my hair which I made very little efforts towards before.

And aside from physical appearance improvements, I've tried to better my social skills and personality in general through new experiences and experimentation in general to try to be more confident around women as well as be more comfident around my guy friends.

The issue I occasionally have with reading through this sub is that ill start to feel overwhelmed by every little thing I should be paying more attention to/working on but don't currently do as much as I should. Things like very subtle hints through texting, or seemingly insignificant body language details, or basically any behavior that women act out verbally or non verbally I feel the need to over analyze it all.

I'm also the type of person who overthinks things a lot, especially when it comes to social interactions. I was just wondering if anyone could give some advice on how to take in everything this sub has to offer without getting so anxious about worrying about every little thing I am doing wrong or worrying about not picking up on behaviors that I should be.

I understand that it is a part of the learning process and that it is a good thing to recognize certain things that I should be doing better and learn how to fix those things. I just believe that sometimes I fall into the trap of dwelling on my insecurities, getting overwhelmed by all of this information, and then ultimately getting scared off from trying to implement the methods and tools I've learned from this page into my own life.

That ended up being a lot longer than anticipated lol but just curious as to if anyone else could relate or had any helpful advice on absorbing the good info this sub has to offer while avoiding getting too analytical and anxious about everything.

Thanks


Post Information
Title How does a young, inexperienced guy effectively absorb and utilize information on this sub without getting overwhelmed and overly analytical about every little thing.
Author NbaLiveMobile10
Upvotes 89
Comments 60
Date 20 March 2019 04:29 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/222619
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/b37lu4/how_does_a_young_inexperienced_guy_effectively/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
sexual market value
Comments

[–]Chadster11348 points49 points  (3 children) | Copy

I know what you mean by over-analyzing everything. I do it too, especially with all these stories on this sub and the main one. I would just focus on the side bar and read the rational male if you haven’t already.

[–]OfficerWade12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed. You can’t do this stuff right. If you focus on every step while you were interacting with a girl it would never make a scenario for you to take her home. That fairy tale- dream/ is what we’re trying to be aware of but too many of us try to re-create those dynamics we learned in childhood

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks ill check it out

[–]ThatKidinAfrica0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Also. Just use your own instinct to filter out the bullshit.

[–]SauliusTRP42 points43 points  (5 children) | Copy

Easiest way is to read sidebar and directly start to apply basics in real word, if you have balls. Some doing the mistake here and reading for years, until they reach that „perfect knowledge“ state, which never happens anyway.

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy

Yeah i've read the sidebar and it's great. And I would agree, applying the most impactful ideas on here to the real world in your own life is the hardest step. I just struggle with overcomplicating these ideas sometimes and feeling like theres so much Im doing wrong but I guess the best way to get over it is to just experiment in the real world, learn from what works and what doesn't.

[–]0io-26 points27 points  (2 children) | Copy

Suppose a guy with awesome game has sex with 1/3 of the women he approaches. (not likely)

Suppose a guy with weak game has sex with 1/20 of the women he approaches.

If you're reading anything at all and making an effort, you should do better than the guy with weak game, especially if your appearance is good.

Now it just comes down to putting in the effort. Think of shooting free-throws in basketball. Nobody is scoring 100% of the time. Even somebody lousy can get the ball in the hoop once in a while.

Even a bad player who tries 100 times is going to get more free-throws in than a world-class athlete who only shoots 3 times.

You'll have a lot more sex and more girlfriends who make you happy if you do invest your time in approaching more girls rather than trying to go from OK-game to slightly-better-than-OK-game.

You'll get in better shape spending 2 hours a day on physical activity than spending 3 hours a day reading about optimal workout routines. You really just have to go out there and make it happen, and the more you do it the better you'll get.

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks that's a good way of thinking about it

[–]Anasthaesium0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I espouse this too. Except with caveat “ never take break the machine risks” Take action but only take action with limited downsides and unlimited upside Example : in lifting : don’t squat 50 lbs more than 1 rep max and break your spine in the name of “action “ In business : don’t take on a customer so large that his payment default is going to destroy your credit and company In pickup : wear a condom AS WELL AS pull out

[–]imtheoneimmortal4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

The master had fails many times than a beginner The beginner is afraid of failing

[–]0io-32 points33 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't over think things.

Approach a lot of girls. Ask them if they want to do something with you that you're going to do anyway. If they come along, try to escalate a little, hold hands, kiss, etc. If that's all going well you can just flat out ask if they want to come back to your room.

Don't be mad if they say no. Some of them will say yes.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed10 points11 points  (5 children) | Copy

TRP doesn't have all the answers. It's not magic.

You could do absolutely everything right from a trp analytic standpoint and still be left alone with your dick in your hand.

These are guidelines and tactics that have been proven to work most of the time on the majority of women.

But life and circumstances do exist that are out of your control.

This is where the bloopers get it wrong, too. We don't manipulate or trick, we've just noticed what works.

Your job is to control what you can, not be a perfect TRP robot.

These are interpersonal sexual dynamics we're talking about. That's an innumerable amount of variables.

I once had a poster ask me if I would write a guide to opening women, covering all the possibilities.

He wanted a "if this", then "do that" code database.

That will never exist.

Learn the basics. Go try them. Be mindful of when glitches in the matrix happen so you can reflect later.....was it something I did or was it just not the right cosmic alignment/she was a raging PMS bitch/she just got an engagement offer.

Trying to keep track of every little thing is inherently self sabotaging just because the sheer volume of shit you'd need to be aware of would overload your brain to the point where's you'd be a stuttering distracted twitchy idiot.

That's not a good look.

Get the big shit down. If you're worried about being in her personal space of the amount of eye contact or wondering if your 2nd kino move caused a reaction, you're overthinking.

You've got to know when to hold 'em, Know when to fold 'em, Know when to walk away, And know when to run. You never count your money, When you're sittin' at the table, There'll be time enough for countin', When the dealin's done.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K189 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

This. Great advice. I like seeing EC's who don't have an ego to push, but keep things real. That's invaluable.

One of the absolute utterly most fundamental strengths in life, is the ability to accept what is outside of our control.

The ability to know when, and be able to surrender. I'm a perfectionist. I've been like it my whole life, in regards to a number of things. I love psychology and human interaction. Not just in regards to sexual strategy and dynamics, but in other forums where interaction is important. My natural passion for why people do what they do, can then spill over into me trying to do things perfectly.

It's also part of the stages of change. The final two stages are conscious competence, and unconscious competence. Conscious competence is when you're pretty sure you know what to do, but you really have to think about it as you do it. Unconscious competence is when you can just do it, without having to think so much.

The final two stages are difficult to transition between. It really takes willingness to get out and put some things into action. You try, you fail, you succeed. Eventually you gain some trust in yourself, and before you know it you're out of the books, and this sub as much and you're doing.

Many people get caught in conscious competence, or trying to learn and perfect everything before 'going out into the field'. That WILL come back on you. You'll have a nice few months feeling good reading shit, then you'll hit depression because you haven't put anything into action and aren't in any better a position.

It takes a surrender. A point where you go 'ok, I understand enough of this shit, let's surrender trying to get it perfect...and just...do'.

In my opinion, there are a few different aspects to Red Pill, but nobody claimed to have a perfect 'do a+b+c, and you'll end up with D'. Much of the theory actually embraces and gives contingencies for the vast number of uncontrollable things.

Many people think plate theory is about PERFECTING the ability to have a harem of women all down to fuck whenever, forever. The truth is, plate theory is about exploring options, approaching different women, being open to new avenues, because the more you meet/date/sleep with different women, the better you get at not needing to be perfect because there is an abundance. When you get one wrong, or fuck up, or she's crazy or just not compatible, next. Eventually you WILL find women who gel with you.
Perfection, and over thinking is scarcity mentality. When you think with abundance, you just do and if the chips fall badly, oh well, abundance and next. Plate theory is healthily discovering lots of people. Not 'getting women perfect'.

Red Pill will also give you a pretty good awareness of how to approach new options. Basically, have some value, confidence, be a strong man, strong frame, know how to interact and how women generally think. Get good at approaching, polarizing and making intentions known. If she ain't down, or you don't click, all good, next. It's either fuck yes, or fuck no. Not 'fuck I'm going to analyse her every nuance for the next month'. At each point, from approach, to first date, to sex to continued plating, you'll know generally what might work.

Red Pill will also give you a good idea of what definitely DOES NOT WORK, and bluepill illusions.

Don't get caught up in thinking Red Pill is like a perfect collection explaining every little action a woman does, and you need to memorize the whole thing. Bring it back to what you can control; your growth, your confidence, your approaches. When you start, you'll realise rejection ain't that bad and you move onto the next. If you notice patterns in rejections, you can take a look at whatever it is. In the process, you're putting in action, growing, and you WILL have successes.

In MY opinion, the best books to read are Rational Male, No More Mr Nice Guy, 48 Laws of Power, Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, and Models by Mark Manson.

That will give you a good run in, and stop you from having to read all the 'what did it mean when she blinked twice, tapped her foot and her head spun like the Exorcist? Is she into me?'

Sorry for the long post, but I've been there. One of the best things is to surrender the end results. Be cool with the game.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Nice points.

Good pull with the unconscious/conscious: incompetence/competence ladder.

Also the idea the TRP will get you women, not woman.

I'll also pull in the Serenity prayer...

God, grant me the Serenity, to accept the things I can not change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.

And the outcome independence umbrella we all should be operating under.

Sometimes we don't get to choose what our options are, but we always get to choose between those options.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K182 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah nice...

I think a lot of guys sort of bastardize Rational Male to be about 'go and discover how to plate and fuck every woman in existence', and manipulate them all.

What I read, was Rollo really saying 'go and explore options, so you find out who responds to you the best'. That's actually healthy, rather than just limiting to one chick who isn't working right (and all the bluepill mistakes that come with that)

The whole 'women like to compete for a high value male' isn't all about 'obsess over fucking tons of chicks at once so they all think you're the bomb'. It was more an objection to bluepill guys who will say 'oh, I can't do that, I'm supposed to give one woman my all, or I'm an asshole'.

Yeah, Red Pill is all about getting ourselves some power back and opening up possibilities.

Love the serenity prayer. I do my own version 'accept the people I can't change - other. Change the person I can - myself'.

Awesome last line, 'Sometimes we don't get to choose what our options are, but we always get to choose between those options'. That should be somewhere on the sidebar.

This sub got a shot in the 'realism' arm this week.

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanl you, all great things to consider

[–]rugged791 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yup.

90 percent of the new dudes on here just want to know how to bang their oneitis. They aren't even at the level to understand the mechanics of it even if we do tell 'em.

[–]smartstarfish24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take it one day at a time.

If you’ve been blue pulled your whole life you can’t beat yourself up for not changing with immediate results.

Being Alpha is a gradient and you’re just starting your journey. Be nice to yourself and reap the rewards in due time.

[–]CasaDeFranco11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Start on the easier digestable parts. Get a good job, dress well, make friends, lift. Then focus on the larger concepts.

[–]kaolin2243 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Take everything you read on the internet with a heaping tablespoon of salt.

Everything. Especially news and advice. Always, always consider the source before absorbing anything, and never, ever take anything at face value.

More often than not, you're going to find people who are the last ones you want to listen to, doling out advice like they're Gandhi:

Dudes who got played and are still bitter about it; chumps who have never been in a relationship; and others who aren't built to be monogamous. Everyone likes to pretend they have it all figured out.

Truth is, nobody really does.

That being said, your best teacher will be cold, hard experience. But at least now you have an expectation of what may come. Test it out for yourself. Then internalize what you've learned and share it afterwards.

When it comes to your happiness, never let anyone dictate the terms of it, especially not a stranger online.

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you!

[–]mrpoopistan3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

I'm increasingly convinced that TRP is basically cognitive behavioral therapy with a side of EMDR (both are psychological approaches that have proven efficacy in treating trauma and anxiety).

On the CBT side of things, TRP is mostly about learning that the things that make you anxious aren't the end of the world. This is the older PUA idea that you need to do a large number of approaches, even failed ones, just to learn that a girl not wanting to fuck you is far from the world's greatest tragedy.

On the EMDR side of things, TRP is focused on installing positive attitudes. It goes an extra step further than EMDR by focusing on programs that tie positive cognition to real-world results. Especially when everybody is told, "Lift!".

That's the rough outline of TRP.

Step One: Confront Anxieties and Self-Truths

You should also develop approach skills in entirely non-sexual settings, just talking to door greeters, cashiers, bank tellers and other people. Talk to everybody a little more -- old, ugly, fat, hot, young, male, female, reptilian overlord -- it doesn't matter. Just talk a little more to everyone.

By desexualizing the general act of bullshitting, you'll have a more desexualized approach when you move on to sexual settings. This means you'll be generally calmer when you talk to hot chicks because you're at least not going to be stumblefucking around the basic of maintaining a conversation.

Things like very subtle hints through texting, or seemingly insignificant body language details, or basically any behavior that women act out verbally or non verbally I feel the need to over analyze it all.

Pro tip: High-status people often blow past other people's signals. Counter-signals are often the best signals. It's the classic idea that a billionaire in Silicon Valley can wear a hoodie to work because he doesn't need your bullshit. The same applies to how well we track others' signals. The countersignal of not caring (ZFG) is far more powerful than trying to win the analysis game.

I also think it's wise to confront self-truths head-on . . .

never been great with women

This is like saying you've never had a great play during the Super Bowl. No shit. You've never been to the Super Bowl. You can't really say you're bad with women because you've never really played the game.

Step Two: Install the Positive Software

It's wise to just itemize the positive features you want to install. I mean this should be done at a very low level.

For example, there's a lot to be said for sitting in a club and just watching other people's interactions like it's a fishbowl. I'm 40, and I still enjoy watching guys try to pick up women and guessing how it's going to turn out. See if you can pick up the moment a guy is going to "get it".

You should then try to make a list of those things that interest you and install them.

For example, one of my brother's friends who has a lot of natural game (though can be a little too tradcon), always works a "darling" into every conversation he has with every woman he talks to. I've actually tweaked this one to be more in the "kitten" to "sunshine" range, but he's a little more twang-y, so I can see why "darling" works better for him. As with any software install, you'll have to tweak the settings to your environment.

Always be on the lookout for new software to install. Turn the overanalysis into a fun game. If you see something that looks cool or that makes you wonder, process it and try it out. Uninstall anything that crashes. Tweak anything that struggles to run. Make updates as your software gets old and stops working as well.

Don't be afraid to experiment. Fail gloriously and have fun doing it.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K181 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The same applies to how well we track others' signals. The countersignal of not caring (ZFG) is far more powerful than trying to win the analysis game.

Great reply. Saving this one. That's an awesome quote, too. I really work to maintain that attitude. If I'm working to watch every single...then I'm needy and outcome dependent. It's real nice to have that grounded feeling of I really don't give a fuck.

This sub has gone back up in the last week.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Just read your entire post. Hadn't read the first paragraph or two.

Isn't EMDR therapy the eye movement therapy created to help the brain process events causing PTSD in the patient? I'm not quite sure how TRP relates to EMDR.

CBT, yes. Gets into changing core beliefs and resulting behaviours. Can see that correlation.

No offence, just curious to the EMDR observation

[–]mrpoopistan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's debatable whether EMDR accomplishes its goal via the eye movement mechanism or via a narrow focus on installing specific positive behaviors.

Yes, the eye movement part is what gets it attention. The goal, however, is to focus the patient on specific negative cognitions and then replace those with positive ones.

My theory has been that the advantage EMDR has over conventional drug and talk therapies is that it steers the patient into the problem rather than away.

[–]AstuteBlackMan6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I analyze stuff a lot too. It's a blessing and a curse.

I use to watch a guy on YouTube (still makes good videos) named Corey Wayne. Basically he said if you buy his book and read it once you'll get only a fraction of the info in it. But if you read it 10-15 times the information will become second nature.

I would apply that method to the sidebar. As soon as you finish it read it again. It may take a couple weeks or a couple days based on the time you have but you'll absorb the information and be able to understand it to where its second nature

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thats a good point, thanks

[–]FiftyShadesOfSwole3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Relax harder

[–]Blazerman_243 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

You are still really young. It's good that you've come across these self improvement principles so early. Just keep working at it. Recognize when you've made progress and don't beat yourself up when you make boo boos.

We are all a constant work in progress. You'll always strive to be better than you are. Idk if you watch sports at all but athletes always talk about the game slowing down for them. Essentially saying after a year or two of playing, they are able to digest and process everything on the field a lot quicker, even if the actual game speed hasn't changed. Enough practice talking to women and the same thing will happen.

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks!

[–]_Anarchon_1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Figuring out what you can change, what you can't, what to pay attention to in life, and what to disregard all comes from wisdom. You don't gain wisdom overnight perusing an internet forum. It comes with time, bravery, and honest introspection. If you're brave and honest with yourself, just chill out. It'll all come with time. And know that you'll stand out above most men, because most don't do those things these days. That'll eventually give you more real confidence, which will also help.

Now, telling someone with anxiety issues to just chill out may not be that realistic or helpful. But, know that there are ways to deal with anxiety. That's a whole other subject though. You might want to research that problem to help with this one. You aren't alone...these past couple of generations are plagued with social anxiety, for many reasons.

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you, those are all great points

[–]Classy_Amir1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You and I... We're alike. A lot. I'm also 19, and I also struggle with what you struggle. Anyway.. I overwhelmed myself for over a year with information. I saw 0 results. I started working out 7 months ago and I started reading the side bar VERY carefully this time. Took me a good 3-4 months to finish it. I started applying it immediately but before I knew it, holidays came in my country and I can't meet women at my uni. No problem, I'm going to improve my day game. Don't read too much. Read little at a time and start applying immediately. When you fail, go back and analyze the situation. What seems to be the problem is usually super obvious. Fix that, rinse and repeat.

[–]DarkWolfBG1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've been through that. We've all been.
My 2 cents are - just don't care. Don't allow your happiness depend on somebody else.
Do whatever you like, just do it with confidence. In all aspects of your life, not only in the personal one.
Don't focus on the fine polish like the sport, appearance, look. It means nothing without the masculine frame and the your confident presence. They can help to get there, but they are not that critical components. They help with the first impression. But afterwards it's only your attitude.
We all know that greatly dressed, good looking guys which catch the eye, but after a couple of minutes talk with a female, they are just discarded. Or the same persons as low-level managers. Too soft, too indecisive, all they do is organize the flow of work, and they are stuck there forever.
Do what you please, don't look for anybody's else approval, live your live for yourself. Because nobody will live theirs for you.

[–]Verderubro1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Practice, practice, practice. Select one topic, put in action. Once mastered/more comfortable, move on to next topic.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

True Knowledge is experiential.

Meaning, to truly understand something, you have to DO something.

Pick the piece of advice you find, that is most relevant and accessible, and DO IT. CONSISTENTLY.

Then pick another one. Rinse and repeat. In six months you'll know more than the hordes of wannabe alphas that populate this sub.

[–]gerfcam1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Focus on truly not giving a fuck, that will lead you out of your head. I saw a comment somewhere about putting yourself in the most ridiculous situations way more awkward than talking to people, once your used to that anything else feels minor.

I have to say, not giving a fuck has a snowball effect. When I started trying I would be brutally honest all the time, no matter who I was with. “My breath stinks” “man my asshole burns” shit like that. After a while I could literally say anything without caring, at which point I stopped doing that shit

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks man, all good points and ideas

[–]moontripper12460 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

By going out consistently

[–]Sakarabru0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Question everything- every TRP principle, each staunch mantra- and build experience by verifying those ideas in your own life. Experiment, find what works for you, learn from failures and celebrate success. Read, apply, analize briefly, then move the fuck on. Cultivate abundance mentality and outcome independence, not just with women, but in all things.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You need to get over some mild anxiousness by taking the problem head on and getting into it. Start lifting and actively improving yourself to overcome your fears for your own good, not for women or anything. You come for yourself first and have to be your own best friend, and confindence will come slowly. What worked for me too was doing what i just typed above, and even faking it at times earlier on. Soon I just started to go with it and ended up just believing myself.

[–]Anasthaesium0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

To begin with develop two cornerstones habits . Don’t be rushed . You have all the time you need. 1. Habit 1 : compound lifts in the gym . There is an app 5x5 which will help . Workout diligently for 4 times a week 2. Habit 2: approach one stranger a day and have a small conversation . It need not be a woman.

Bonus habit 3. Eating clean and getting 8 hours every night while eliminating sugar and caffeine from diet .

Do these for a few months and see how you feel.

[–]furcryingoutloud0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've never met anyone that at 19, had been great with women. There is no bar you have to meet, or requirements you have to pass. No pressure, no demands. Nobody cares how well you do with women, nobody is judging you from the sidelines. And nobody is taking notes. You, are your greatest enemy when it comes to life.

"Getting women" is the absolute emptiest achievement you can be chasing. Think of it as being able to solve crossword puzzles. Yeah, it makes you look good in front of some people, but it's an empty achievement, it garners nothing of value as far as achievements go. At 19, concentrate on how you can make money. Look for consistent monthly revenue opportunities.

Money is the honey of life. Concentrate on making it, and you'll be chased by much more than women. Don't chase women, let them chase you.

[–]AwakenedSovereign0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"How can I do that? How do I get from where I am to where you are?" Dr. Strange

"How did you become able to perform the most complex surgeries?" The Ancient One

"Study and practice. Years of it." Strange

[–]FederalAnxiety0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you're doing everything right. It takes time, often years, to be able to learn and effectively use everything.

For dealing with women, keep reading and learning the principles. First learn why you should respond to certain things in certain ways, then learn how to do it by reading examples and practicing in the real world. Repeat ad naseum and you'll get there.

[–]imtheoneimmortal0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Listen red pill music, watch red pill films and read red pill books

[–]hrm08940 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

By reading the posts (sometimes even mutliple times if it's good) consistently and for a long time. Then you need to apply it in the real-world and learn from your mistakes (and you will make plenty of them). After a couple years the posts will feel repetitive and that's how you know you've absorbed the information.

[–]W_O_M_B_A_T0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're not "overwhelmed." You're choosing not to approach women and flirt because you're still terrified of rejection.

This is like reading a bunch of books of piano music, but never sitting down to the keyboard, then claiming you're overwhelmed by all the notes. Maybe so, but that piano ain't going to practice itself.

[–]frankgold0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Take it one day at a time, one thing at a time.

Also, I'd say take your focus away from girls/women. You are very young at age 19. Instead of chasing tail for the next 10 years, chase your dream life for the next 10 years. When you live like %99 would wish to, but only %1 can, women will start throwing themselves at you, without you chasing them.

See: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY-e2u35OCA

[–]ChadTheWaiter1000 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Too sum things up- focus on self improvement. Don’t worry about what people think.

[–]jellyman6430 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Wtf is mid social anxiety? Grow up

[–]NbaLiveMobile10[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What the fuck is the ignorance of this comment?

[–]TopofToronto0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The issue I occasionally have with reading through this sub is that ill start to feel overwhelmed by every little thing

Then do one thing and accomplish that one thing, congratulate yourself for doing that thing and smile as you fall asleep that night that you have changed your life by doing that thing, and don't think of the other stuff.

Then that thing becomes routine and you can accomplish the next thing.

The thing I started on was to make my apartment less "bachelor" to tackle the dishes everyday, cleaned out the fridge. etc. I did not do the entire apartment in one day but set a small task, what I could accomplish and did that. Then soon half my life had changed.

anxious about worrying about every little thing I am doing wrong

You can't do something wrong, really, you do things your way.

I hate gyms, I do not go to one. I hate the routine of having to go to one. So I got a few bar bells and other things to use as weights and have them around house. Now I do lift correctly, not with the back and use correct posture, I lift them when ever I have time , even have a set in the kitchen and do some reps while waiting for the water to boil or the microwave to finish.

but if I told some some gym head dude bro He would say I am doing it all wrong and have a routine of increasing my reps so much per week and my weights .. yada yada yada

I don't care .. I did it my way, I lost weight and gained muscle tone my way which is what I wanted.

Ask for advice and if doing it that way does not work , find your own way to do the same task.

[–]red_matrix0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Read The Book of Pook
  2. Hit the gym and lift
  3. Stope watching porn.
  4. Delete social media

[–]jm510 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I was just wondering if anyone could give some advice on how to take in everything this sub has to offer without getting so anxious about worrying about every little thing I am doing wrong or worrying about not picking up on behaviors that I should be.

Stop trying to be perfect. Not going to happen. Once you have given yourself permission to be imperfect, you will be able to give yourself credit for your achievements.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The issue I occasionally have with reading through this sub is that ill start to feel overwhelmed by every little thing I should be paying more attention to/working on but don't currently do as much as I should.

Pick one thing.... work on it for a few weeks WITHOUT READING TRP. Get that thing down, then move onto the next.

You're young, you've got decades to work through this shit. Do it one bit at a time though

[–]SittinAndWaitin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Take all the information you see here with a grain of salt because it's infected by cucks acting tough by hating women. Just do these things consistently and you'll be a new man in a year.

Heavy squats and deadlifts. Raises testosterone Eat a balanced and complete diet. Raises testosterone and makes your mind sharper. Pick a musical instrument and practice daily. Makes your mind sharper, gives you confidence, and is impressive. Be true to yourself and express your thoughts and emotions in a way most people can easily understand. This will give you confidence about your own ideas as well as emotional maturity.

Do you know why the top tiers of men don't need pua or the red pill to get laid? It's because they're true to themselves and then surround themselves with people who respect that.

Take care of yourself. Be yourself. Surround yourself with people who respect you for who you are. That's it.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Look at the Big Picture Here

  2. Make an Outline of TRP Stuff

  3. The Outline Should be Subjects like "Lifting" "Financial Independence," "Looks-Maxing" "Status Building" "Personal Fulfillment" "Socializing" "Interactions with Women"

  4. Then there should be sub-headings for each one. Things like lifting are pretty straightforward. So start there. Sub-headings would be "Intervals" "Exercises" "Progression" "Sleep" "Nutrition." Others would be WAY more complicated.

  5. As you read TRP, you can add stuff that you think is relevant

  6. Apply the stuff to your real life

  7. Journal Regularly

  8. It's work. It's life. Nobody said it would be easy. You get what you put into it. Someone earlier bitched about there being no rules. Well, here's a rule: If you jack off and play video-games all day, you degenerate into a fat slob. If you put in a fair amount of work in a balanced, disciplined, scheduled way, you WILL get a return. It may not be EXACTLY what you were expected, but things will improve in some way shape or form, UNLESS BAD LUCK / FORCE MAJEURE / ACT OF GOD, BUT HEY'S THAT LIFE, YOU PAY YOUR MONEY AND YOU TAKE YOUR CHANCES, GL.

[–]KORB43110 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Get out of your head, you've read the material now go execute. Trial and error, the more practice you get the better you become.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Consider cognitive-behavioral therapy for anxiety. It can be done online for free through the eCouch program. It's some of the most red pill shit ever that doesn't get talked about much, and it ties in extremely well to NMMNG and WISNIFG.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2021. All rights reserved.

created by /u/dream-hunter