Cold shutdown

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May 19, 2019
6 upvotes

We had sex the other day and I was dirty talking about how she'd better have been a good girl to earn that d. Worked like a charm.

An hour or two later, we're bantering and throw in a subtle reference to her being a good girl and she dismissively says "I'm always a good girl" and immediately changes the topic.

What happened here? What dynamic am I missing? Did I get too beta after sex? Should I remain colder? Could she have some insecurities about sex that she doesn't want me to even subtly reference it outside the bedroom?

Just looking for some help sorting this out. I feel like I'm missing something deeper here


Post Information
Title Cold shutdown
Author Onein1024th
Upvotes 6
Comments 24
Date 19 May 2019 10:16 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/238922
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/bqfcn3/cold_shutdown/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
beta
Comments

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red37 points38 points  (3 children) | Copy

Just because you can call your woman a dirty cunt and piss on her face during a raunchy session doesn't mean that dynamic translates to when you are both in a home remortgage meeting at the bank.

Calibration.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

/u/FereallyRed nailed it. Women want to feel dirty during sex, not after

[–]Onein1024th[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

this makes sense

how do you calibrate flirtation outside of the bedroom? probably my weakest area; I feel like I'm either all business or putting my foot in my mouth, even when I'm trying to be subtle

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lots of guides and posts if you search "game your wife".

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Could be several things, what's ok in the heat of the moment might embarrass her in light of day. It's the difference in setting down over coffee and asking her thoughts on getting a thumb up her ass, and just sliding one in when your fucking her while shes on all fours. One requires logic to process the other is lizard brain pleasure sensing. Dont over think this.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando18 points19 points  (10 children) | Copy

What happened here? What dynamic am I missing? Did I get too beta after sex? Should I remain colder? Could she have some insecurities about sex that she doesn't want me to even subtly reference it outside the bedroom?

Why do you care?

Spend more time fucking her brains out than trying to fuck with her brain.

[–]Onein1024th[S] 1 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy

Why do you care?

I care because it feels like I did something stupid and want to learn from my mistake

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando1 point2 points  (8 children) | Copy

Your mistake is caring too much. Give less fucks. Then, when you do something stupid, it doesn't matter because you don't care.

Problem solved.

[–]Onein1024th[S] 1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

I mean, do I care how she feels about it? no.

Do I care about learning life lessons? No. I confidently sit at home in dirty sweatpants smelling of B.O. surrounded by dirty plates while playing fortnight marathons. B/c what's more IDGAF than that?

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

I mean, do I care how she feels about it? no.

You're a fucking moron. I didn't ask you if you cared about her feelings. I asked you why you cared.

I give you some real life lesson advice and you come back acting like a passive aggressive little bitch.

Fuck you.

[–]Onein1024th[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

love you too buddy

[–]TravelingJew0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Lmao you do everything but talk to her. No wonder you pump T.

[–]RedPillCoach1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

That's you not caring about yourself.

What would not caring about your wife's bad behavior look like?

[–]Onein1024th[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not caring about her behavior would look like this:

I was trying to be cheeky making that comment, but maybe it came across needy? Maybe it was actually validation seeking and I didn't realize it but she did?

other than that, tbh my reaction to HER reaction was to just keep the conversation going about the primary topic and ignore that she made that face at me. TBH I didn't pay it much mind at the time until I took a shower later that day; I'd like to be smart enough to understand WHY she reacted that way, even if I'm not bothered by it. Trying to overcome my semi-autistic upbringing from bluepill upbringing and going to a STEM school

[–]hack3geRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Wtf is this shit show? If you are going to tease a woman do it because you enjoy it and are having fun not to get a reaction. You have a lot to learn.

[–]into_being3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

“Good girl” is so vague. She was probably already horny when you said it the first time. Correlation, not causation.

I don’t think you’re going to get much out of just saying “good girl” and expecting tingles. Try being more specific with your feedback, “I love it when you do X.” Or “you look so sexy when X, makes me want to do Y”

Edit: swapped correlation/causation

[–]screechhaterRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dumb mother fucker running through the streets with dynamite.

Oh look there is the crack of her ass, plant it there

Tact. Timing. Attractiveness is not a comment or noun poorly timed to sound like vulgarity

[–]simbarlionRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You made her uncomfortable either during sex or in the convo after. She shut you down

I don't think it was quite the 'charm' you thought it was.

SMV too low, girlfriend.

[–]TaipanshimshonRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Stop thinking. Your brain doesn't work

[–]stoicstephen4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

What a pity.

You are 100% in her frame.

[–]RedPillCoach1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

"I'm always a good girl" and immediately changes the topic.

She is embarrassed at being a slutty little girl for you. Dirty talk primarily works when the girl is turned on. If you try it- or sometimes if you even reference it- when she is NOT turned on then she gets embarrassed. It is a dominance trick she is pulling on you. Be submissive and slutty, and then assert your authority and dominance. A dance as old as time.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She probably doesn't even remember you making the comment in the bedroom. Chad says way crazier things to her, your words don't even register on her bad girl scale.



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