666,886 posts

I had to act and I acted.

by 5ive5ive6ix | July 30, 2019 | askMRP

24 upvotes

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Influences: NMMNG, WISNIFG, Monk Moding the Side Bar. 6’3, 205lbs, 14%BF, 245 bench press for reps, 315 deadlift for reps, 145 shoulder press for reps, Lagging on squats at 275 for reps (right knee injury). 34 years old. Wife is 36yrs old, HB9+ at prime, HB7-8 post wall. She’s still up there.

Background:

2010: She was a hot bartender and close LJBF. She was on her cock carousel, and I was spinning plates like a fucking elephant in the circus. She was well aware of my plate spinning and did not want anything to do with me emotionally or sexually. It didn’t matter, I got her to hop on and an LTR sprung after 2 years of LJBF.

2012: Beginning of our LTR. I was deeply committed. I went Oneitis on her. I dropped all my plates. It was laughably difficult because I never thought about how difficult clearing my table would be. It frustrated her. She had trust issues like The Godfather. She wanted those plates gone and out of my life. She deleted all the girls off my phone and I didn’t care. They were just plates. Eventually, my table was clear and all the plates were out of sight. No more random unsolicited “hey...” texts in the middle of the night. Looking back... one would think those would be the worse times in our relationship but they were not. They were the best. My LTR was the sluttiest, dirtiest, personal porno star of mine. We played around with BDSM quite a lot. She loved being submissive. Ball gags, anal hooks, nipple clamps, ropes, candle wax, throat fucking... you name it! She was down. She was the dream fuck. It was like she was competing for gold every time we fucked. Knowing what I know now; it was clearly because those plates created dread. She was on her toes. She made sure she was the best. DREAD IS REAL, FOLKS! (I wish I knew this then.)

2015: Happy Wife, Happy Life! (You MRP vets must be gagging. Knock it off.) I religiously subscribed to that ideology. Instead of plates, I was spinning covert contracts like an elephant in the circus. FRAME? What frame? I continuously lived on the “Happy Life, Happy Wife” standard. Sure enough, years have passed and I victimized myself with these contracts. I victim puked all the things I thought I was entitled to as a married man. Shit, my DEER game? That shit was on fire. I was the best Defender, Explainer, Excuser & Rationalizer that ever existed. I went from AMOG to a blue pill faggot. One positive trait I kept was never quitting the gym. I’ve always lifted; however, every time I went, she would send me out the door with a sweet kiss and “see you in an hour”. She set a time limit. (Good lord! Writing this is making me angry at myself!) Sex began to trickle down to duty sex. She initiated, but I still considered it duty sex. Blow jobs are fucking rare though.

2019: 3 years of marriage developed into a steady decline in intimacy. I lived in her frame. I whined to her about dumb shit. I complained about beta shit and demanded (stomp,stomp) she respect me as her husband and the father of her child. That was our cycle. We’ve hit a Plateau pretty close to the bottom and we went to terms with it. This is marriage. This is where we are now. This it our baseline because I’m a pussy. It’s all because of me. I have accepted my life. What kept me slightly “together” was being able to go to the gym more often than I could because my gym has a day care now. No more childcare issues. I got my physical frame back. I’m looking good. I went beast mode and added intermittent fasting. Manly outside but a real fag inside. I owned it and I was ok with my piece of shit boat in calm waters.

Stumbling Upon MRP: I was not looking for answers. Remember, I was content. Sex was happening, just not the sex a wanted. I figured it’s just marriage. This must be how it is. I wasn’t looking for internet advice. I literally just stumbled upon MRP but that’s not important. What’s important is the rabbit hole of self realization known as the prerequisites and sidebar that I found myself navigating. I began to realize that I turned into a faggot bitch. Like holy shit! What happened to me?! I use to tell the bro’s “treat em like dirt, they’ll stick to you like mud”. Now look at me. I’m a little pussy. Instead of going in a rage, I kept my composure and just MRP’d. I educated myself and was able to backtrack and review where and how things went wrong.

Present day: I was going to delay the application of MRP. I wanted to fully understand and really think it out. I’ve read NMMNG & WISNIFG. I wanted to re-read the side bar. I wanted an MRP diploma before I went to work. Unfortunately, my wife and I had an incident which required MRP tools. She wants to surrogate for her friend. I did some version of DEER to convince her that it would be a bad idea. The issue tucked away for a little bit but resurfaced on (let’s say) D-Day 1. This time I applied a hard “no” and I STFU. She proceeded to negotiate blowjobs and anal sex if I said yes. It pissed me off because I’m smarter now and I know better. I don’t negotiate with terrorists. I held my ground. I hit her with another “No” and I STFU. It became a 15 minute one-way conversation of her DEERing while she (drunk) cried. It was one way because I STFU. It was so fucking liberating to not fight or argue.

D-Day #2: Same conversation. Same “No” & STFU. (I was amusing myself.) She was a bit uneasy. I could tell because of the head tilt she did, waiting for me to DEER. (Meanwhile I went back to the sidebar making sure I’m doing things right.) I’m holding my ground and beginning to understand frame with her help. She wanted me to live with a pregnant chick and a baby that’s not even mine. Fuck that! Hard no.

D-Day #5: I am the captain of my ship. I am feeling good. I wanted to live in my ship (household) the way I wanted. I decided, since my daughter does not need baby gates around the house, I removed one of three gates while my wife was at work since the gates are just a nuisance. They served no purpose. I left for work before she arrived home. A few hours later, I received a text “You removed the baby gate!” I didn’t respond because it was not a logistical inquiry. She later texted about logistical info and I responded. All was well throughout the day.

D-Day #6: IDGAF. I cleaned the whole house and arranged some furniture for more room and functionality. It looked great and I was pleased with myself. I was doing things for me. All the while, I’m not hurting anyone. I didn’t go full retard with the furniture adjustment. Just tweaked it a little bit. She came home with wandering eyes. She’s catching up. I was doing things. I acted like nothing changed. I didn’t seek her approval. Business as usual for me. UNTIL... she hit me with “I want the baby gate back!” I hit her with a “no” & I STFU. She responded with “why are you doing these things? You’re doing things and not consulting with me.” I STFU. She told me she would put it back herself if I didn’t. I STFU. Next thing I see is her placing the gate back. I let her. Once she was done I simply removed the gate again. No rage. Cool as a whistle. She wanted to argue. I didn’t. She was angry by herself. She had nobody to fight with. Instead, I put on the best casual clothes I had and hopped in a car to Walmart and got some deodorant. This triggered a 4-day silent treatment from her. She even took my daughter and stayed at her parents over the weekend. She wanted to hurt me, I didn’t let her. I hit the gym. I cleaned the house, read books and worked on myself. She saw it. She saw I used the time she gave me to polish myself.

D-Day #10: She was prancing around the house all quiet and butt hurt while I’m happy as A gay guy doing squats in a cucumber field. Suddenly, she seized the silent protest and began to converse with me. Like nothing happened.

Here is my question... I’d like to think I successfully hopped out of her frame (I plan on staying out) and this was the main event before I start building my own frame for her to enter. Am I interpreting these events correctly? Or did I just go fucking Rambo? I’d like to know or be warned of any shit storms that might come during this phase. I don’t want to get blind sided.


Post Information
Title I had to act and I acted.
Author 5ive5ive6ix
Upvotes 24
Comments 19
Date 30 July 2019 01:45 AM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/247326
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/cjkvq4/i_had_to_act_and_i_acted/
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Comments

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

Main event?

Fuck no. You are just getting started. Strap in and get ready for the ride of your life if you keep at it. But, it pays big dividends after a couple years.. not 10 days

I’d shut down that surrogate BS and let her know it’s a deal breaker. Simply say those words... “deal breaker.”

Because it is

[–]IncitingDramah34 points35 points  (2 children) | Copy

This whole post is cringe.

Let's start with the good. You're covering the basics, good! You seem to have some concept and can follow basic advice. Lifting, check. STFU, check. Reading, check.

I dont really give a fuck about your cringe buzz word "used to be amog" history puke. Shits fucking pointless, because here you are.

So skipping over the bulk of your ego trip...

She wants to surrogate for her friend. I did some version of DEER to convince her that it would be a bad idea.

Good you identify you're DEER, also good you corrected coarse and made this a hard No. Props for having balls and common fucking sense.

She proceeded to negotiate blowjobs and anal sex if I said yes. It pissed me off because I’m smarter now and I know better. I don’t negotiate with terrorists.

Good, shits like negotiating with ISIS. Good work.

It became a 15 minute one-way conversation of her DEERing while she (drunk) cried. It was one way because I STFU. It was so fucking liberating to not fight or argue.

Complete waste of time. Something this asinine shouldn't even be entertained. I personally have better shit to do, like made weird shapes with my balls, than entertaining bitch think this fucking dumb.

D-Day #2: Same conversation. Same “No” & STFU.

Good. Keep it that way.

I received a text “You removed the baby gate!” I didn’t respond because it was not a logistical inquiry.

You dont have to be so mongoloid about it, but it works. As a Captain you can always just let it know "it was in the way". Let's be real, you probably have her jazzed up after your balls dropping again.

UNTIL... she hit me with “I want the baby gate back!” I hit her with a “no” & I STFU.

This is what's called a shit test. You passed, but in a crude way. I truly appreciate your ability to STFU (because it seems rare here with newbies) but jesus dude. Fucking robot... be fun. Something like "if you're really worried I'll just you on a leash to keep you out of trouble". Part of passing shit tests is being fun. Anything that isn't in your frame should be amusing or irrelevant, make it amusing and witty if you want to build attraction.

. This triggered a 4-day silent treatment from her. She even took my daughter and stayed at her parents over the weekend. She wanted to hurt me, I didn’t let her. I hit the gym. I cleaned the house, read books and worked on myself.

This is doing it right.

I’d like to think I successfully hopped out of her frame (I plan on staying out) and this was the main event before I start building my own frame for her to enter. Am I interpreting these events correctly? Or did I just go fucking Rambo? I’d like to know or be warned of any shit storms that might come during this phase. I don’t want to get blind sided.

10 days, and you wonder if this is a main event? I'd personally say no. My wifes main event was fucking awe inspiring, I'd say you're doing good work and shes firing away at you with the tools she has unsuccessfully. You're making head way, but my guess is you havent hit a main event. 8-9 of faggotry will NOT be undone in 10 days.

Keep building, reading, improving. You'll sense the main event approaching while you build on dread. All in all, you're doing ok, be more fun, game her, and build passive dread.

And yeah, you're going a bit rambo, but I dont think you're going full retard. Dial it back just a hair, this needs to be more like communism creeping into America, not Hitler coming to power.

[–]Perfectinmyeyes6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nice write up.

[–]HIJKelemenoP-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Meh.

[–]PillUpAss7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

For being new, you are getting a lot of things right. However, your reluctance to apply MRP as you learn it is faggotry. It’s an excuse to avoid risk taking and action. You can’t learn it just by reading, you need continual, practical application. There is no diploma, just lots of fuck ups. Maybe the only advantage to being married is there’s a woman there to shit test you to death until you master these concepts. Until then, it’s hard mode and you can’t not play, faggot.

Secondly, nice lifts. Keep that up.

Finally, the surrogate shit is a simple hard no. As in you are leaving the relationship no. Go back to spinning plates in that case. It’s just a shit test.

The rest of your frame questioning is you asking if you can dodge bullets... You’ll know once you have frame because you won’t need to ask.

[–]Perfectinmyeyes2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I liked your comment about advantage of being married is there is a woman to shit test you to death until you master these concepts <<<really interesting if you think about it. And not just in relation to women but to other areas of life. Ie the advantage to life is it will shit test you to death until you master its concepts and then they are no longer shit tests.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

In nine years you've gone from a plate spinner...

I was spinning plates like a fucking elephant in the circus.

.. to a guy who gets a kick out of cleaning his house (but is careful not to go Rambo about it)..

I cleaned the whole house and arranged some furniture for more room and functionality. It looked great and I was pleased with myself. I was doing things for me. All the while, I’m not hurting anyone. I didn’t go full retard with the furniture adjustment. Just tweaked it a little bit.

I’m happy as A gay guy doing squats in a cucumber field.

You might as well be a gay guy in a cucumber field, coz you're fucking yourself in the ass every day.

Get back to the sidebar and start posting this shit in OYS.

[–]simbarlionRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Cool as a whistle.

Lol. Have a look for the children with dynamite post. Stop trying to use the "tools" for a bluepill dream and invest in the changes to yourself that you need to make to be a man you are proud to be with or without your child gates.

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Here we go again guys, this is what happens when you give a kid dynamite.

OP, most of what you wrote is looking for mommy's approval. Yeah, you passed some shit tests but in the most shitty way.

Captain Rambo, welcome to MRP. You're going to get angry. Just dont be an asshole to your wife about it... alot. You're going to. It's ok. Just dont stay in Ramboville too long and you will be fine.

And this isn't a main event at all. My main event was my wife asking me to be her Dom and my submissive. And this was from a woman who had "no sex drive". A year of MRP is what this took but I was only a faggot for a shorter time.

It will take time dude. Relax. Enjoy the journey

[–]The_LitzRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll be honest with you, I just couldn't read the whole post, your mind is all over the place and I am a simple man that can only follow one thought pattern at a time.

Firstly, 'I used to be alpha but became beta'. Many a man has sobbed that line in here. Fact is, you were young and carefree and didn't give a fuck. Then adulthood and all its burdens appeared and you started struggling to cope. Not a big deal, it is part of growing up. Alpha or beta isn't the answer to every little interaction you have in life.

Now the surrogacy.... In theory it is a wonder of science and a selfless act, but in practice, she is allowing another man's seed in her body.

The fact that she is even entertaining this idea means she views you as a a domesticated cuck. Her view of you and how you see yourself is at odds with each other.

Keep passing shit tests and improving and she will come around, or not.

Going forward you are going to go Rambo very soon, chill a little, this is a long term journey, not a band aid to fix something quickly.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I like some of this, I laugh at other parts of this because it's pretty predictable.

What does 'STFU appropriately' mean? Lets start with what it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean not talking and trying to silent treatment your wife like a retarded 5 year old.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This isn't a main event, this is her being confused by you being an asshole. Yes, be more alpha, no, don't be a stonewalling asshole. You're 10 days in... You're not ready for a main event.

She doesn't even notice your changes... Even if she did, she doesn't believe they're real or permanent. Keep reading and try not to go totally Rambo like this.

Good for you for setting a boundary of not being ok with your wife being impregnated by sperm that is not yours. You haven't heard the last of this, but I'd make it a hard boundary and you better be prepared to enforce the boundary. This could very well be the source of your main event..but you haven't had a main event.

[–]helaughsinhidden0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Many people don't have an actual MAIN EVENT. Changes can be more gradual and nuanced as it is with me and a lot of others. You still have to pass a lot of shit tests to convince her you are for real. By your own admission, you don't even have your own frame fully established for her to commit to, so this was definitely not "it".

Lot's of changes over a short period of time is bound to make her confused. Her hamster was probably spinning big time. "Is he having an affair?" "Is he having a stroke?" "Is this a midlife crisis?" "Oh no, he is gay and coming out of the closet!" Were all higher on her radar than you finding your balls again.

Am I interpreting these events correctly? Or did I just go fucking Rambo?

What you've had is her experiencing some kind of event. I guarantee she was NOT going to be a surrogate, but it was an attempt to connect emotionally. Hell, at 36 years old it is MORE likely she's probably got a little baby-rabies kicking in or having a PMS episode. At her age and mileage, even if one kid was both of your plan, she bound to second guess that choice at least a couple times before the eggs are all gone.

Drunk crying

The crying? Lot's of feelz going on at once. Grieving the wall, you refused a (shitty) bid for attention, being told "no", hormones, actually being drunk, and the actual fear of menopause itself can all be a huge bummer for her. A hug with a smile and a kiss could have got that anal sex and blowjob anyway after telling her no. In my experience, they only speak out loud what they actually want to do already.

This triggered a 4-day silent treatment from her.

Silent treatment for extended periods is butt hurt. Letting her stay out of the family home with your kid is butt hurt too. When she initially brought it up, it was a COMFORT TEST, you failed it. You are the captain, the leader. Extended silence or the cold treatment from either of you should be unacceptable too. Break that off with kino. Kiss on the forehead on the way out or a slap on her ass when she walks by to let her know that what happened was "OK" and that "things are just fine".

Stay the course.

You are off to a start. Keep reading and paying attention. Like I said, I think she was initially looking for more of an emotional connection and comfort than a shit test to start with, but you have no doubt made an impression. Keep in mind that MRP isn't about becoming cold, distant, or cynical. It's about being pragmatic regarding female hypergamy. Understanding the male tendency towards passivity, complacency and weak behavior. Overcoming social pressure to cave into blue pill conditioning, and avoiding the negative consequences that they bring.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

/u/ChokingdownRP said it.

You are essentially remembering what it was like before marriage. When you are just IDGAF. It’s easier to plate. which is why the “pro-marriage” movement lately is all about saying, being married is so much harder. Don’t do it! But they say it as a shame thing. it’s is a bastardization of what we used to say. MRP is red pill on hard mode.

becasue you can’t just next her without consequences.

I also am not sure why you are getting such a hard push back on your frame. I think it’s pretty solid. I mean it’s autistic as fuck, but pretty good for a new guy.

In short you Rambo’d. Like big fucking time. You digested all the material and just roid raged it all out. Look up the user /r/2gungetsome look at his story. That is a guy that had a mission and purpose and laid it out very well.

Ease back. Real improvements come with time. She literally has no idea who she is dealing with.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ok. I get it.

You don’t know exactly what your doing, but you’re getting there. Good work. Long way to go. But in a good starting place.

At some point she is going to want to “talk”. No to surrogate, no to cuckery. Deal. Breaker. (Frame). Just smile. Say no. Then, STFU

Good. Job. Reseting Every Fucking. Day.

That is crisp. Many fuck this up

As you noticed, with her on day 10 she is acting like nothing has happened and starts to engage. Problem ? What problem ? Manipulation at its finest. Identify. Defeat.

It’s a real important tactic to be the great guy. In frame. On point in his mission. Politely refusing surrogate as a deal breaker and fucking smile.

Shit storms are coming, but you deservedly earned them going absolute beta bitch.

Anyway time to start hitting the gym for up two hours all-the while leaving the phone in the car. “Oh, I see I missed your- 50 calls, is everting ok ? “.

[–]WolfofAllStreetz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I lold pretty hard at the gay guy ripping squats in a cucumber field part though. Well done.

[–]mrp_awakening0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Aww... she LJBF'ed you and then you got an LTR outta her? How sweet. I honestly stopped reading there. Thank god... wall of text with too many shes to count. Youre balls deep in her frame giving too many fucks. Fix it.



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