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Does anyone else find it excruciating to further interact with a woman who rejected you?

Reddit View
August 17, 2019
70 upvotes

It is why I will never date a co worker again. Or anyone else I will have to see again if it doesn’t work out. Some guys seem truly indifferent but to me it’s always an massive elephant in the room. Anyone else like this?


Post Information
Title Does anyone else find it excruciating to further interact with a woman who rejected you?
Author EdgyMcdonuts
Upvotes 70
Comments 54
Date 17 August 2019 10:59 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/249406
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/crtbb9/does_anyone_else_find_it_excruciating_to_further/
Similar Posts
Comments

[–]quarternickledime 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy

No

[–]its4thecatlol62 points63 points  (1 child) | Copy

What a masochist.

[–]E9er8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

a compliment to some. thank you.

[–]Ill_mumble_that8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Seinfeld nailed it. Abundance.

https://youtu.be/T9W_jW4e_uY

[–]Borsao6670 points71 points  (31 children) | Copy

So back in like 2012 or so, there was this real estate agent that I had the hots for. Asked her out and not being redpilled at the time, got shot down pretty hard.

Fast forward a few years and a couple of weeks ago she found me on LinkedIn and said she was coming back to town and that we should go out for drinks.

Looking now, the past 7 years haven't been kind and after how she shit on me, I found myself laughing at how this had panned out.

I noped right the fuck out of that message thread and blocked her.

[–]TheHyperHuman20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy

If I understood you correctly she wasn't really pleasant when she rejected your advances, so I get why you wouldn't go out with her, but it seems to me from the tone you were writing in that you still have some lingering anger towards this woman and I wanted to say she is isn't worth the emotion.

[–]latinasonly7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

dude you should have just banged her. big deal of she rejected you back when. you let it get to you.

[–]askmrcia33 points34 points  (1 child) | Copy

There's no guarantee that she would put out. Probably just wanted some attention from a guy she felt would always be there for her.

Basically she thought he was an orbitor

[–]latinasonly2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

if its not too much of an investment , llay some game down when u see her. if ur solid enough you can convert old chicks who didn't take you seriously to your new ways.

[–]1NathanHollister1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

He said she wasn't hot anymore

[–]golgynat0r7 points8 points  (5 children) | Copy

you could go out and let her jump the hoops for you just for your own amusement and then nope the fuck outta there

[–]HurricaneHugues48 points49 points  (2 children) | Copy

That's feminine. No need for that nonsense.

[–]nsfyou22 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Feminine? You want to have sex, right? Is she fuckable? If yes, she has presented you an opportunity. Keeping in mind that you want to do her, you make an arrangement with respect to your frame, a.k.a her jumping through your hoops. If THAT doesn't work out, then you leave. If it works out, bang you'd have had yourself some sex. Fairly easy lay.

Keeping your dignity and not utilising an opportunity are not the same thing. Plus, you sound a bit MGTOWish, or something else in that direction.

[–]TheHyperHuman8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

That sounds like a waste of time.

[–]Designof2 points3 points  (11 children) | Copy

Why did you need to block her?

[–]Borsao6646 points47 points  (8 children) | Copy

Do I need a reason?

ETA Thank you for the silver kind stranger!

[–]Irtotallynotrobot3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You do that to exercise control over who you're letting in to your life. It's important to get into that routine so that, when some girl is playing you later on in the moment, you don't get caught up in a woman's web and instead move on to a woman who treats you better. Standards for how people treat you.

[–]HurricaneHugues1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

How bad did she reject you? Talk about it.

[–]Borsao667 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy

It wasn't so much harsh as just bullshit.

We worked in industries that overlapped but weren't co workers. It was just low SMV at the time.

[–]rambler4295 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

So you admit you were low SMV. Sounds to me like she acted appropriately for the situation.

Why be mad?

[–]riskitit0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

The fuck is wrong with you? Are you the coworker?

[–]rambler4294 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

If a girl who you weren't attracted to came on to you, wouldn't you reject her?

Unless you have no standards, yes, you would.

This dude wasn't attractive to her, she acted like anyone would. Why be mad at her for it?

This should be a lesson. If women aren't attracted to you, the problem is you. Fix it.

[–]riskitit-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

Lmao. You sound like a desperate bitch who would let anyone trample his feelings because its "logical". Well here's the news for you big brain: The girl already rejected you, yet you still want to act all nice with her? For what? For a shot at sex? For fuck's sake she made it clear hell no by rejecting you.

I think I can get mad if I'm rejected. Not "logical" enough for you? Not my problem, deal with it, my beta cocksucker.

By the looks of it my standards are even higher than yours.

[–]rambler4290 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

First of all, I never said anything about acting all nice with her. I said why be mad?

Being mad at someone for acting the same way you would in the same situation is not only ridiculous, its a waste of time. Forget her. Move on. Learn the lesson and improve from it. Acting all butthurt is bitch behavior.

I've always heard that when a person can't defend their position, they revert to personal attacks. Clearly, you'd rather talk shit to me than have an open mind and try and understand what I'm saying here.

You do you, Killer.

[–]riskitit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oooh you butthurt bro? Cos that doesn't seem 'logical' to me?

Edit: well, you can keep downvoting me if thats logical to you ;)

[–]ashblossomcherries52 points53 points  (1 child) | Copy

Don’t shit where you eat.

Got curved by a girl in my dorm earlier last semester and had to see her 3 times a day everyday for the rest of the semester. Don’t ever do this to yourself.

Or do it and you’ll learn for yourself.

[–]Rimefang14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lettem find out the hard way. Life teaches the best lessons.

[–]Gordon-G5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Never fish from the company dock. Learned this the hard way. Ended up changing jobs for metal sanity.

[–]kaolin2245 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't find it excruciating because I don't further interact with exes. If I'm not in a relationship with them anymore, and this means either as my plate or girlfriend, once it's done, I'm done.

I've seen enough relationships implode because guys date their coworkers - which is a huge, huge mistake. Or they date from their favorite sanctuaries, like the gym, favorite lounge, etc. The drama is ridiculous, and the guy ends up having to rearrange his life when it goes to shit because he's spoiled where he spends a good amount of his day.

You can tell people not to date coworkers until you're blue in the face, but they keep doing it. So whatever, they're grown men; let them reap the whirlwind.

Every woman I've dumped has always tried to sell me on the "hope we can still be friends". They take pride in how many exes are still friends, which is crazy considering how their relationships ended.

It's like, "dude, she was cheating on you with your best friend and me. Why in the hell would you want to be 'cool' with her? She's trash. "

If it was mutual and something crazy happened, then maybe, but there's no point unless you want to start it up again. However, if you already split up, don't be surprised if the same problems come up again in the future.

If it ended badly, you're torturing yourself by keeping in touch. They'll call you ruthless and cold-blooded, but that's fine.

Personally, I find it highly offensive when an ex is complaining to me about her current boyfriend, especially when we've been intimate. Fortunately, the solution is simple.

Tell them to fuck off when they try to re-engage, block them on everything, and pursue new prospects.

[–]binarySearch_recurse 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy

The common rule when trying to get a woman's phone number / hit on them is to not do it to a girl that you will see after you have tried your shot at her. So playing game with a girl from one of your classes, at work, the gym, etc is not a good idea because it's awkward as fuck when you see them again and believe me: I know exactly what you're referring and I too feel that it is really awkward when this happens to me.

However, take my advice with a grain of salt because I feel like I play it safe too many times and don't risk it enough. Theoretically on paper, if a guy feels nothing when he gets rejected is more likely to be successful because being rejected will not prevent him from keeping to pursue women. On paper it is easy to think that not having any negative emotions will make you more successful, but when you do get rejected, you feel like shit.

I think I'm getting to the point where being rejected hurts less and less because I've been rejected so many times like most guys if not most, but I was able to get gfs because I took those risks.

[–]latinasonly18 points19 points  (1 child) | Copy

bad advice . it shows a lot of character if you can get rejected and go about as if nothing happened. sometimes the odd akward feeling can become sexual tension if you dont fold and shy away from the persons eyes after being rejected. let the other person shy away from you. hold your gaze.

[–]johncillo3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am with you on this, that’s how you build frame, it is to your own amusement, The resilience you get out of it will maximize any other encounters in the vicinity, it teaches you outcome independence, being secure if yourself as well as not being butthurt. Have fun. The only exception to this is don’t shit where you eat.

[–]goathunter050 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bad advice

[–]hot_soup194 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

No because I don't talk to them ever again

[–]2ComplexProjection3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

It’s a problem of ego, over-investment and lack of abundance.

If she was just one of those girls, you wouldnt mind.

[–]red__Man4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

make it a reason to work more on yourself.. make her watch progress getting better and stronger while regretting rejecting you when she had a chance

[–]soukyfi2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Learn to take rejection on the chin and ask for more

[–]Pokeylaw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If they reject me no deal but I'm still gonna act like as normal as I can be.

[–]ArksunHD0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I learned the hard way not to do that I see her every day in lunch time and we share a common social circle

[–]Spaghetti17760 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not if you just pee on her like a normal person.

[–]uptimex0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It is this Chinese "Doing by not doing". You are there, you interact, but you don't have any energetic exchange with that person. You create this emptiness with her.

[–]ThePifta0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I still sometimes speak with crushes who rejected, friendzoned me. I think that's cool. I'm not feeling anything towards them, a some of them became great friends of mine. So yeah :D

[–]TooManyThots0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think it's a good test of how well you can control the narrative. I have a friend who's done this and played it off as "haha remember when I tried to get you, oh well doesn't always work out" with a smile on his face. Then would constantly be seen with new women as well.

[–]goomerall30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No, as a matter of fact just happened last week...

[–]1NathanHollister0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I love it. You get to watch them suffer as your smv for sup and they come to wish they had gone out with yiu

[–]VigilantSmartbomb-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Man fuckkkk her



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