You are the sum of your habits, be it negative or positive.

Everyone (myself included) have habits that they'd wish they'd break, perhaps you bite your nails; are hesitant around women; or doubt yourself a little bit to much.

A solution exists, or so I've found.

You can condition those negative habits out of you, as well as condition positive ones into you, with a little help of classical conditioning (think pavlov's dogs) and psychology.

I wear a rubber band around my wrist 24/7. Whenever i find myself doing an unsavory behavior, be it biting my nails, or telling myself "That broad won't want to talk to me" i snap the rubber band. That thought or action becomes associated with the pain of the rubber band snapping, and as time progresses, you'll find yourself doing that action less and less, until at some point it's out of you completely.

As an example, i used to bite my nails to the root, and the cuticles around them. I started wearing the rubber bands, and everytime i find myself with my nails in my mouth snap. Its been two months, and my nails are perfect.

I've also used to it to combat my depression and hestiancy with talking to females. My depression tended to start with me talking myself down into it, i'd say to myself "I'm a loser", or "People hate me" and after a while i'd sink into a deep week long depression. Now, every time i tell myself "I'm a loser" snap or "i hate my life" snap. Same goes with girls, when i tell myself "that girl won't be me interesting" snap, or "i shouldn't speak to her i'm ugly" snap and i'd follow it up with "I'm fucking awesome, i'm a great catch".

The key thing to make this work, is you must be committed and consistent.

For instance, I've tired many a time to drop my wretched tobacco habit, twice while using this method. But i failed to abide by those two rules, because, deep down inside i didn't want to quit, i enjoyed it to much. So when i found myself using tobacco, i'd rationalize it by saying "Oh I've had a bad day", i wouldn't snap the rubber band. Or, "It's just once in a while", again, i wouldn't snap.

It works, without a doubt, but you have to want to fix your bad habits. You have to want to be a better person.

There is sceince behind it if you're interested. Links: http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/The_Rubber_Band_Technique.html

http://www.anxieties.com/panic-step8b1.php#.VG512Plr6So

Edit: 3 notes,

  1. This is not a crutch, or a cop out. It's a tool to be used to help break unwanted habits, if you're not commited to it, it will not work.

  2. Extinction: Psychology terminolgy for being exposed to the conditioned stimulus (say nailbiting) without the conditioned response (rubber band snap), after a period of time, the conditioned response will subside. You'll resume biting your nails, possibly.

  3. You can also incorporate positive conditioning, if you do something commendable you can give yourself a reward to encourage that behavior. While it works (from a psychological standpoint), i've yet to find a discreet way to incorporate it into my daily life.