Is there any chance for a 32-year-old virgin woman to meet someone?

Aaren_Augustine · 2018-11-02T08:34:59+00:00

If I had to read between the lines I'd wonder if you come off as asexual in all this. There's a lot of MRP dudes who have religious wives that are completely uncomfortable when it comes to sex.

Past that, you are the dude in your life with a career. So there's no room for a man in your life; you've got that role already. And a lot of men your age know they can get someone that's a complement to their own life. So I think you have a problem being malleable to a potential husband.

what is left for me?

I'm sure there are plenty of men. They simply don't stack up to your base standards. I'd bet you stacked the wall because you're too afraid of sex and or men. You don't become a 32 yo virgin by accident.

Russelsteapot42 · 2018-11-02T09:19:47+00:00

Speaking as an active atheist, you may have luck through church singles groups. The kind of men you are looking for do not advertise, they just get introduced around in gatekept social gatherings.

2018-11-02T08:28:04+00:00

I guarantee you've rejected guys before. So yes, it is possible for you to meet someone, you already have.

shusakusai · 2018-11-02T09:01:15+00:00

I don't think the fact that you're 32 or a virgin matters as much here, it seems like your standards are just unrealistic.

The more checkboxes the guy you want has to tick the harder it is going to be to find one, and once you do will he be single? Probably not, and because he's such high value he'll probably have very high standards himself.

It's still possible though I guess, weirder things have happened

Good luck

UsedAlgae · 2018-11-02T09:49:55+00:00

Nearly every decent-looking woman who "can't get a date" is emotionally distant. Do you know how to flirt and be vulnerable with men?

I don't know about Brazil in particular, but in a country where most people settle down eventually (ie, not Japan), I'd be surprised if most guys in your age range are still trying to avoid marriage and screwing around.

TRP is not the majority of society. They're mostly guys who grew up as awkward pushovers or shut-in nerds and are bitter about not spending their youth sleeping around. "The wall" as they describe it is just a revenge fantasy against the women who rejected them when they were young.

Nobodykers · 2018-11-02T10:18:55+00:00

I bet there are multiple men in your life who would want to date you but fall below your standards.

messiahslave · 2018-11-02T10:41:50+00:00

tl;dr : two things might block you in building a relationship 1° you are too used to your celibacy to change and abandon freedom and let someone be involved in your life 2° your standards are too high and either you accept to lower them and be happy with that or you don't and accept to remain single rather than commit in a relation that you will never see as fullfilling.

My 2 cents since I share three common traits : good successful career + catholic + 32 y/o virgin

The biggest problem you will face imho is that you might be too used to your own celibacy to get involved into a relationship.

You say that the "the greatest dream of my life was to meet the right guy", it might be me that see a lapsus here but you write "was" not "is" and if you do an introspection then maybe you will find that you don't really want that much a relationship.

I mean, as a catholic, if you are serious about that, a relationship is a damn commitment and that means giving up a lot of liberty. Being single you can do whatever you want, whenever you want and that is no longer an option if you get along with someone and moreover if you found a family.

However, as single person, we have generaly a lot of hobbies or a few passions that took a LOT of time, at least for me between my job, my sports and my readings, I don't have much room to anything else. I always took a night per week for friends but that is all, the rest of the time I'm busy doing my things.

Ironicaly, I feel that people who go from one hook up to another and people who are always single share this thing, they enjoy too much their ownself/own freedom to commit or at least they are so used to it that they will not be able to change.

That even makes me wonder if the term "incel" was really fitting me anymore cause in truth, I don't even know if I would be able to commit in a relation or even a regular dating if I had the opportunity.

So since, it is not your looks that set you back, I would say that it the abovementionned, you manage to build a too much fullfilling life on your own to open up to other person or fit in the dating world (it is a lot of small talk, and shit like that which bore me to hell for instance).

You should ask yourself that and you can retire one or two days in a monastery for that. Ask God to enligth you on that matter, he always ask in the holy bible : "what can I do for you ?". So, yeah, go for the question, what if God put in front of me mister perfect, would I give up a part of my "freedom" for him ? would I be really ready to let someone come in into my life ?

If you can truthfully answer YES to all those questions and you are never able to find someone then your standards might be too high and in that case there are two options not a thousand, two : you either really accept to lower them and that means you enjoy being with a person that was less beautifull/rich/[insert whatever quality you want] than you expect for in the first place or you don't and accept to do so (or can't) and remain single rather than commit to something that you deem not worthy of you.

Since you are RP, you might believe in hypergamy so the only option would be to remain single as your assumption is that women cannot really lower their standards and if they accept to lower them they will see themselves stuck into a relation that is not fullfilling.

So yeah, if you really want a relation from the bottom of your heart and are redpill, chances are that you will remain single and so be it.

Hope my insight be any helpfull, God bless.

redpillgirl1986 · 2018-11-02T09:29:35+00:00

Come to the USA and clean up. I met a reasonably attractive Brazilian woman from a chess website who did just that. She was a hard worker as well and became an electrical engineer.

You sound just like her tbh.

wtknight · 2018-11-02T11:20:38+00:00

I have met attractive men in the past who were interested in me.

And why didn't any of these meetings eventually work out? You are either too hypergamous and looking for the perfect men and keep rejecting other men because of this. Or the men are frustrated by your lack of flirtation and other indicators of your eventual sexuality and they get bored with you. Flirting and showing a sexual side doesn't mean that you have to have sex right away with a man, if that's what the issue is. On the other hand, you have to give the men who are interested in you something to look forward to in the future sexually. Also, it's important to have a personality that actually interests men if you want them to be patient and wait to have sex with you.

EnduringLiberty · 2018-11-02T09:48:45+00:00

It would be quite difficult to understand the situation and market in Brazil, and give you advice that would be useful, but here are my guess on the subject.

I don't think that the wall is physical. Some women in their forties look amazing, but past 30, guy have their life in order and care quite less about female validation. They are also more experienced and will be very weary about marriage, having heard the fate of their friends.

I also don't appreciate the idea of causal sex with people i don't know, but would have no trouble if i trusted the person. If you are like me, i would recommend you to try to meet and talk to a lot of people, and see who you click with. Also try to improve your social skills and self knowledge.

Now, for the dirty tactics, there are two that i could think of. The low road or the high road.

I have friends that are quite uneducated and poor that are approached by women that directly put on the table that they want marriage and children. You can find a man that has quite few resources and resolute yourself to be the main provider of the household as well as the main strategists for the household decision and take on yourself that he will have a lot less of emotional intelligence. if you think in your heart that you will not ressent your husband shortcomings, then, welcome the the life of men.

If on the other hand you are set on hypergamy, then, as guys of your level will prefer more open girls, i would recommend you to travel a bit. (even if Brazil right now is quite developed from what i hear). Hence you can find guys that are higher than you, but relatively lower than the average population, and if you don't ... well, you will have had an interesting vacation anyway. There are companies that provide organized treks for people traveling alone by exemple.

DXBrigade · 2018-11-02T11:15:17+00:00

The Wall is BS. Just be more proactive in your love life. And be more laid back. Go out and meet people.

Tyler_Gatsby · 2018-11-02T11:17:01+00:00

Will you click on "edit post," and see if it will, "summon the automod" please.

Tyler_Gatsby · 2018-11-02T12:49:41+00:00

There's a popular woman here who had a similar problem, and she turned it around into a bf slaying sex kitten, and now is in a happy LTR, last I read. Maybe hearing it from her perspective could help you. Paging u/RockinSocksll...

redpillgirl1986 · 2018-11-02T09:42:51+00:00

I have met attractive men in the past who were interested in me.

So what happened to them?

Whenever I read one of these posts by women, they run through a list of all their virtues and lay out how amazing and awesome they are. They give a hint, like this one, that they're okay but somehow guys just don't stick around. If attractive men have shown interest, why did nothing come of it?

If no guy you like is interested in you or men just never seem to commit, you're the common denominator. The problem is you, not the guys.

I'm very accomplished, I have a good career, a nice salary.

So many women start with this as if it's going to attract a man. No, these are things YOU desire in a man and are projecting. You mention your looks halfway down when it should be near the top. Men cannot fuck your salary or your career and they don't care for it explicitly. It's a great bonus in a world where we need two salaries to survive, but men do not get turned on by a woman's career.

Women will write a man off for not earning enough, but men want to know if she enjoys sex can maintain her looks, if she's loyal, kind to him and knows how to be feminine.

So what exactly happened to those attractive men who showed interest in the past?

redpillgirl1986 · 2018-11-02T12:07:47+00:00

[permanently deleted]

abaxeron · 2018-11-02T12:08:39+00:00

Is there any chance for a 32-year-old virgin woman to meet someone?

Chance? - Yes.

If you asked me why I'm a virgin, I couldn't give you a very clear explanation

Hmmmm, let me help you out - you are a virgin because you haven't had sex with anyone. (I know this one probably belongs under automod, but I just had to)

the greatest dream of my life was to meet the right guy.

Which leaves us with two possibilities - either the right guys don't exist, or your radar's threshold is through the roof. Note that I dismiss the possibility that the right guys exist but aren't interested in you.

But everybody keeps saying women hit the wall at 30.

No; "everybody" keeps saying women are beautiful and valid and healthy and perfect just as they are - at every size, and age, and with every possible disability, mental illness, N-count, or criminal record. TRP is a fringe viewpoint.

And every RedPill blog I read tells men never to get married. Ironically enough, they tell women to catch a good guy and marry him as soon as they can. How are women going to get married if men are being taught to stay single?

Wonderful "gotcha", very vanilla, and we're all aware of it. BUT, any discussion in this direction will result in strawmen; we can either discuss a specific "RedPill blog" that simultaneously tells men to never get married and tells women to get married as soon as possible, or we can pretend that you never said this part.

However, it'd be nice to meet a good man. But I'm afraid I'll never be able to. If women hit the wall at 30, if men are not interested in getting married or being a serious relationship, what is left for me? Please, just be honest to me. I'm not afraid of awful truths.

How many guys have you asked out in your life?

redpillgirl1986 · 2018-11-02T12:39:53+00:00

What do you have to offer a man?

2018-11-02T12:53:23+00:00

stop believing in fairytales , go out , meet people , and find someone you feel comfortable.

you don’t have to lose it with someone you love , lose it with someone you’d be happy to remember . Won’t be hard to find

Aaren_Augustine · 2018-11-02T13:28:14+00:00

This post is being removed since it appears OP has abandoned the thread.

Eastuss · 2018-11-02T11:14:40+00:00

Ironically enough, they tell women to catch a good guy and marry him as soon as they can. How are women going to get married if men are being taught to stay single?

So you just discovered TRP and RPW were trying to optimize antagonistic goals? You just discovered that marriage is heavily advantaging one and not the other therefore one has to avoid it and the other absolutely want it?

If women hit the wall at 30, if men are not interested in getting married or being a serious relationship, what is left for me?

Majority of men drop their polysexuality for monogamy and make shitload of compromises just to make it work. Why can't you? Your standards, as most women, are probably too high, and you're asking us what you should do without dropping these standards.

At some point if your current situation brings you nothing, you have to input in more effort.

I'm going to guess you:

are not approachable
are not letting people get intimate with you
are not attracted to majority of men
are not approaching men and expect men to approach and do all the seduction and escalating
have expectations on their status and level of accomplishment
not into sex
not into feminine role in a relationship

Basically you're better than most men at being a man on tradcon standards, therefore you seek an even better man, but you're a mediocre woman and offers very little to men. You don't even seem to be a good deal for tradcon men.

At some point you'll have to do an effort on any of these points if you want someone. But you don't seem to believe your standards are movable, and already stated you're not desperate and don't care that much, so I guess you're just going to stay alone.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-11-02T11:43:18+00:00

You are picky, neurotic, uptight and over value yourself. Classic spinster.

You didnt say one word about what you have to offer a man. Do you meet men? Do they ask you out? Are you open and encouraging or closed and bitchy? You wrote paragraphs about yourself with no useful information

Saving a flower til the bloom is off the rose is a fools errand and that is what you've done

CainPrice · 2018-11-02T11:39:19+00:00

It sounds like a case of high standards.

If you're even remotely cute, then I'm sure guys have asked you out before. Each guy either wasn't up to your standards and you rejected him, or he was good enough to find someone else who would have sex with him and he wouldn't stay with you.

Sex is a huge part of any romantic relationship. If you're not having sex, you need to be super-clear why, and you need to bring just about every single non-sex quality you have in you to give to the forefront. And be a little forgiving if a guy doesn't meet every single box on your checklist. You don't meet every box on theirs either.

2018-11-02T10:39:41+00:00

I myself am very conservative and the idea of having casual sex always disgusted me. I have never been interested in meeting guys just for fun or sex ...

Found the problem.

Title	Is there any chance for a 32-year-old virgin woman to meet someone?
Author	redpillgirl1986
Upvotes	2
Comments	53
Date	November 2, 2018 6:31 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/9thn7f/is_there_any_chance_for_a_32yearold_virgin_woman/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/is-there-any-chance-for-a-32-year-old-virgin-woman.259203 https://theredarchive.com/post/259203

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