Anyone else thinks this is a flawed concept?
Hear me out :
If you don't give any boundaries, you have a better chance at gauging what type or a person the girl truly is without your interference / guidance. The moment she does things that you don't like, you can just next her.
The only issue with this is that there's a chance that she might have changed "for real" because of your boundaries / direction, but the chance of her changing her behaviour through your guidance is, in my opinion, smaller than the information she gains to use against you by your given boundaries.
What I'm saying is that - if you clearly state your boundaries, she now has information to use against you. If she knows you don't like her doing x and y, she might start hiding doing exactly those things - a route that's more realistic than her changing her over-the-lifespan learnt habits "for good". Why change if you can have your cake and eat it too?
I'd rather be the guy who nexts a girl because of her actions / behaviour than the guy who is in a relationship with a girl who hides her true nature because of your verbalized boundaries.
At least the first guy isn't wasting his time on a prospect that doesn't appear to be as it is.
So my question is - what's your stance on this topic, and whether or not you think it's a flawed concept.
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Uhhh...if that is true why TRP guys keep talking about “setting boundaries” all the time? So it was alpha and now it is beta? Can you like...make up your mind?
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Ok, but there are lots of contradicting opinions so if both opinions get upvoted, how do I know who is right: them or you?
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You got this all wrong.
If she is a plate and you feel disrespected, by all means next her. I didn't say this was an LTR, you did in the title of your post. If so, then you don't next or soft next to set boundaries. Actually, that never works for setting and enforcing boundaries. What you need to work on is DREAD.
As I am reading your comments, this isn't actually about a party is it? This is starting to sound like a shit test that she is intentionally trying to get you worked up to see what happens. Maybe you are boring and she's manufacturing some drama, maybe she spotted some insecurities and looking to see how deep the rabbit hole goes, or maybe there is no party and she's meeting Chad.
Either way, you are failing all scenarios. You are imagining her cheating, being cucked, losing control, breaking frame, scared to trust her, worried about opening "Pandora's box"?! FFS man, look at all the hamstering you are doing all over this shit post.
You lack an abundance mentality. I'm telling you the truth, let her go and act like you couldn't care any less what happens even though you are scared shitless. If you don't, she will only see you as the needy and insecure beta and will start to plan her monkey branch. All women would rather be Chad's side chick instead of a Beta's oneitis. You got oneitis, so fake abundance until you hit the gym and become Chad.
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I think it also depends on the girl’s age and amount of previous relationships. If she’s relatively inexperienced in relationships talking about and enforcing boundaries could imo be a good idea and the girl is easier to mold to your liking.
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