Link: https://archive.is/zkyL1

From the post:

She wouldn't bring him to spite me. Just stuff like, mike used to do this, my family was pretty comfortable around mike, etc. At first I told her to stop, I just don't like hearing about ex lovers it has nothing to do with us now. Then I started to get angry until I blew up on her.

All right so she must have gotten the point right? He doesn't like her shit tests. Then she tries another way to 'test him':

We are driving to a party and she sais "promise to not get mad I have to tell you something". Sure I said. She goes on to explain how he's been texting her but she has been blowing him off. She won't respond and if she does its to explain that she wants nothing to do with him. I said it's ok to be friends with the guy I just don't want to hear about him in all our conversations. She refuses and said its out of respect for me.

Her way of letting him know she has options

Later that night were driving back and we're talking about why she doesn't stay over that often. She explains that it makes her mom uneasy and out of respect for her she tries to stay home. Afterwards she goes on to say "I'm not sure why she's nervous with you, when I stayed at mikes house she didn't really care" "I guess it's because she knows we're more serious and you might steal me away hehe". After she said that I just got sad. Not mad, just sad, sick to my stomach. Why would I want to hear that? Why would you talk about staying over at his house when I've asked you to please stop?

OP decides that this is a dealbreaker and gets ripped apart in the comments

When i was dating my wife, I would see something or she might say something that would spark a memory and I would be in the middle of telling a story and would realize that it included an ex. My first thought was to shut it down, but she would pick up on it and explained that she knew I had past girlfriends and to finish the story.

Like you said, I don't think she's trying to rub anything in your face and she did admit that you two are more serious, so I don't think she's pining away for Mike.

It was her first and only other relationship. Pretty significant. I think you're being unreasonable in expecting her to not mention him at all, especially when you haven't even been together that long.

Four months is a very short time. References are going to pop up. But these recent examples have been her comparing you FAVORABLY to him. As in your relationship is more serious, and that she blew him off because she cares about you more. She is showing you she prefers you.

I think you need more than a casual comment about not liking this, but not a blow-up fight either. You need a calm sit-down. You have to communicate to her how badly this makes you feel. You also have to understand that assuming she will never mention someone important from her life again is not a fair expectation. Accidents not only happen, but frames of reference linger.

If you can't do that, then you might have to move on. But don't be surprised when other potential partners reference past relationships, and don't be surprised if you catch yourself doing it too. It's human.

I'm sorry but you're being childish. It's not like she's talking about how much better he was than you or anything she's talking about how much more serious of a relationship you two have. Look, you need to grow up a little. Is this the first relationship you've had with a girl who's dated someone before you? It's been only 4 months. Of course she's gonna bring up his name sometimes. This shit happens and you need to learn to accept it. You can't expect her to pretend that that relationship never happened. It's part of life. She's trying her best here. It's a slip of the tongue. No one's perfect. She's also trying to make you feel better by saying that she considers your relationship more serious and she doesn't want him anymore, she wants you.

Can you imagine the outrage if the genders were reversed? But he's a man so he should just deal with it. It's not like the gf is bringing Mike up when it's even fucking necessary. Who wants an image of his gf getting banged by their exbf? And the fact that he's asked her to stop mentioning him and she hasn't shown she doesn't care about his emotions. Heck he's okay with her being friends with him, he just doesn't want about him in their conversations.

Moral of story. Put up with shit tests or you're a controlling asshole.