I was so incredibly blue-pilled 2 years ago. Even after my ex cheated on me, got pregnant and hid the fact that she had a baby from me (it was long distance), I still chose to believe that most women weren’t like her, that she was simply a bad apple.

I had a crush on this girl who I thought was the sweetest, most innocent thing. She was a cute, dimply 6/10 who spent her time reading and drawing manga, huge introvert. She completely shocked me and everyone else when she started dating this infamous “bad boy” Chad who spent his time fighting dudes and fucking any thot who crossed his path, including his best friend’s girl and his own cousin.

Instead of believing “all women are the same”, I chose to believe that the “poor girl” had low self worth and that’s why she got involved with a guy like that. I figured she was so shy and timid because she didn’t love herself and I went right into “save a hoe” mode.

Obviously he was treating her bad and she started looking dead inside. I white-knighted her hard. Wrote her a long ass message telling her she was beautiful and deserved better, and invited her over for a big dinner by me. She agreed. I slaved away cooking these Pinterest meals and put on some movies I knew she liked. She seemed extremely gracious and I thought I was doing my job right. I continued inviting her over for dinners and even started buying her shit she needed and/or wanted. Note, I didn’t have a lot of money.

I thought that with each sweet word, each compliment, each dinner and each gift she was falling deeper in love and “realizing her worth”. Soon, I even got her to dump the Chad, something she did right in front of me. He couldn’t have cared ANY less. She thanked me to the heavens for giving her the courage to let go of him and I thought I HAD her.

I continued pampering her and she continued loving it. I confessed my feelings and she told me that she had feelings for me as well but “wanted to take things really slow”. She praised me for being the sweetest man she ever met which only made me want to do even more for her. This continued for like 2 months.

You can guess what happened next. I went over to her dorm and saw the Chad coming out. This is when she told me that she never stopped sleeping with him. She twisted the knife by saying she couldn’t help herself. I was absolutely sick, broken and totally humiliated. She was getting what she needed from me (food, gifts, sweet words) and what she needed from him (dick).

Even though I’m definitely not that guy anymore, I still cringe to my core when I think back to it. I don’t know if I can ever forgive myself for cucking myself out that way.