Dancing lessons Tips&Tricks

idgaf- · 2016-02-23T08:08:01+00:00

Ayy I've been dancing this shit over 10 years I'll share some thoughts too. In general they are the same as yours.

Treat it as a social scene, not a bar. You will see the same people over and over, maybe for years. Befriend everyone.
Don't be that needy guy doing pick up. Seriously. The scene is usually not that big (unless you are east or west coast) and reputation will get ahead of you.
Lemme tell ya a girl who can dance well can bump her SMV like 2 points. There is something hypnotic and primal about movement. Likewise that 9 or 10 who can't dance is kind of saddening. Probably the same for guys and it's a boost to confidence and leading.
This shit isn't a quick way to pick up girls. It takes lots of training and you should actually enjoy the music and culture of it. The fun, the parties, the scene, the friendship, travelling to out of town events, is all worth it.
Expect to spend years of regular practice to get good at something like salsa. But if you smile and have fun you can appear to be much better than you are.
Don't be afraid to make mistakes. Laugh them off.
If you lift and can dance you will stand out like crazy. Most dancers don't lift, or if they do, not very seriously. Your SMV will be exponentially high like that.
When you are an excellent dancer the advanced girls will surround you. There aren't that many and they are more valuable as social proof at that point. Again, befriend everyone. The social proof/status effects are magnified by the tight scene.
Have fun with it. Shake it up. Like, try leading a turn you know, but only using her hips. She's self conscious too and if you're having fun goofing around she drops it. It's a huge relief.
If you join a dance team (I'm on two) don't plate your team members (shit where you eat).
The girls on the border of the scene (that can't dance well) are the best options for flings / plates. They look up to you.
You can LTR girls you see often. It's not out of the ordinary, it's pretty common. Just remember the gossip WILL spread.
You can take the body movement you learned to regular clubs.
If you got $$ take privates. Group lessons are a waste of time because:
All the "turn patterns" you learn, it's like PUA canned lines bro. Eventually, you don't need them. I take very few salsa classes now and I just do whatever the fuck feels good.
My own flavor of bachata is very sexual. Sometimes I barely move my feet or turn the girl. They like it. There is nobody that can teach it. Don't sweat turn patterns at all for bachata. Learn body isolations, musicality, flavor, develop your own style, have fun.
Bachata is ridiculously easy to sexualize. I mean that's the whole point / origin of it. There are a lot of style / teaching now that take that sexuality out. Those are for the betas.
Look up when you dance. Because:
Girls will dance with anyone but eye contact is the best indicator she's into you. Or if she tries to start conversation with you and asks your name and shit. Girls are bad at leading so if you sense IOI just take the lead immediately. Move her away from the floor (and other guys).
Kizomba will make you a better dancer in every way. It doesn't look like it but it's much harder than bachata.
Zouk is probably the hardest and best looking. The training produces very good female dancers. Because it's hard they also tend to be younger and hotter. I hooked up with this one zouk dancer and dancing with her was damn near transcendental.
Here's a bachata zouk fusion dance. He's controlling nearly all of her movement, body rolls and even head tilt (through a hand signal). That's the zouk technique, it's mind blowing.

WhySoRuff · 2016-02-23T02:31:06+00:00

I agree completely to the point that I consider my swing/ballroom/salsa/waltz/line/square dancing skills a secret weapon and get mildly annoyed when someone posts "learn to dance" because I feel like it's giving away my advantage.

Every dude has that scene in his head where the alpha male says "I don't dance." Or dudes think dancing is inherently feminine. Couldn't be more wrong. Dancing well soaks panties, literally.

Best part is you can go to a dance meetup and practice on the old ladies. They will be thrilled a strapping handsome single young man showed up because there is almost always a surplus of girls at dance classes/meet ups and the dudes who do show up are being dragged by their molls.

smartengineer93 · 2016-02-23T01:44:40+00:00

Leave your ego

Yes yes and yes. It took me 3 months to just no suck. After 3 more I didn't bore her. Another 3 and I'll actually be halfway decent.

I find I don't have to game at all when I dance. My dance group is there to dance with side lessons and not the other way around so I experience the sink or swim environment. But as I have gotten better (combined with being the only guy there who lifts) the girls come to me.

With that said, don't shit where you eat is solid advice. Kino is frowned upon until we do the bar meetups. THEN it is grab ass time.

Stop saying sorry

yes, I had a teacher in a class explicitly tell beginners that two things: "you suck, keep trying we don't judge you" and "you get one sorry a dance. Do it twice and I won't dance w you again the rest of the night." Apologizing is bad. Own your shit. I typically just crack a joke, "that's what I get for playing around outside of class" and move on.

Eye contact is a touchy subject for me. Too much and it is awkward, too little and I look bored. Haven't found the happy medium yet.

Dance with everybody. Literally everybody. Even the male instructor. The bad girls you can play around and tweak and find what works for you no pressure bc they don't know the difference. Good follows are great because they style and it pushes you - plus they are twice and fun to dance with! Lots of men follow, few women lead. Dancing with your male instructors can give valuable insight to how to fix the small things bc they have had those same issues and now they are so good they are doing the woman's job! They learn to follow to become a better lead. Utilize this.

Dancing is not gay. I've heard it on here several times and I'm sure I'll get it more after the previous comment. This stigma actually makes it easier for us because women meet a lot of thin feminine men who don't look them in the eye, have shitty skills, poor posture, etc. Dancing gives major social proof when you look the part (well dressed, V shape, decent dancer).

WhySoRuff · 2016-02-23T04:43:37+00:00

I've heard that women judge a man's bedroom ability with his dance floor performance. I have my own thoughts as to why, but I'd like some advanced members to please enlighten us...

Firespit · 2016-02-23T16:28:06+00:00

Does it have to be salsa? What about ballroom or modern dance?

peruvianlurker · 2016-02-23T12:40:05+00:00

This is huge for living in Latin-America. I live in Peru and if you're a man and don't dance you simply are out of the game.

Diabolical_Nuke · 2016-02-23T19:13:09+00:00

Dancing is a fun sub-culture to study while taking part of. You can learn a lot of Redpill lessons by going to a dance function. I took a few salsa classes in college, and I experienced almost every tip you included.

Something I would like to add is to beware the "alpha" female when learning to dance. This is the bitch who only dances with the best male dancer in the class. He enjoys dancing with her because she knows higher-difficulty moves and can follow his lead, so he can work on more technical moves. She is just there for the social proof.

I ran into one of these hags in an intermediate class turned advanced (all other class members had done a performance together the previous semester). We were practicing a new step I'd never done before, and lo and behold I get to dance with "alpha" bitch. Immediately she had her bitch face up. I was struggling mightily keeping in time and kept freezing up 3/4 through the movement. After my latest failure, I said "Damn I can't seem to get this one" and started laughing. She very sternly said "Well you can either just do it or keep bitching about it". I looked at her, shrugged my shoulders, and walked off the dance floor (one of the rudest things you can do). Probably not my best move, definitely could have handled it better.

A few other things I'd like to add:

Even if you suck, you are the lead. Be the lead. Girls love it.
Dancing is harder for guys than girls. We have to practice harder as we have to move ourselves and whoever we dance with. Oh well.
Learn from men how to dance if possible. Women don't know how to teach the lead.

The_Americano · 2016-02-24T21:58:12+00:00

Fellow Salsa dancer reporting in to confirm all of the above, get out there gents!

seattleron · 2016-02-24T22:12:01+00:00

What's the most fun/enjoyable kind of dance lessons to take? Salsa? Swing? Ballroom? Would love to get into something like that so I can take a break from life and do something to up my SMV while having a good time.

KhazarKhaganate · 2016-02-23T07:52:40+00:00

Thank you for this. I was wondering about it, because one girl wanted me to come to dancing lessons. But I wasn't toooooo interested because I figured I'd embarrass myself and I'd lose her attraction. (good decision in hindsight at the time, but bad for long-term).

Anyway, I was also veeeeeeery worried about boner problems. Like I'm imagining many scenarios where I start dancing with a hot girl, and then get turned on or something, and it leads to a very embarrassing situation.

Can you expand a bit on that? You kinda mentioned it in one place, but somehow it didn't go into a nightmare scenario? I honestly feel like it would happen to me all the time. Although, not as much as when I was a thirsty beta.

NikolaiVuhg · 2016-02-23T09:36:39+00:00

Where to start? What dancing style would recommend for true beginner?

Frogtarius · 2016-02-23T12:46:44+00:00

can confirm, I am a dance instructor, dancing for 12 years now.

yummyluckycharms · 2016-02-23T21:03:01+00:00

Interesting fun fact: Girls in different cities dance differently due to culture.

When I came back to Toronto, I took a dance class to follow up on a dance class that I was taking in NY. In NY, the women were just as clumsy, shy even, but warmed up and were willing to let you take the lead. Followed your body when you pivoted, and hugged your body when required.

In Toronto, half of the girls in there kept on trying to lead / refused to follow. You can tease them about it, but after 4 weeks, it just gets pretty embarrassing when the girls keep trying to step forward instead of backwards. Plus the personal bubble that women here have is just weird. Think rigid waltz instead of salsa.

This is not to say that dancing lessons are a bad idea, as it breeds confidence, but I do think that in some cities, women dont respect it as much vs others. Certainly, I would say in Toronto, it isnt as important as lifting and making money.

barmaleo · 2016-02-23T07:54:53+00:00

Thing about alcohol, at least in my case, it's a great combo when you actually dancing, you do a shot, go dancing for half an hour then have another shot. That way it keeps you in the fun tipsy drunk phase for very long time. One thing though - when you stop, it catches up really fast and you may end up hammered within 10 minutes or so. So it is not the best course if you're with a girl hoping for a fun in your bedroom unless she's into limp dicks. Otherwise great for clubbing.
Also, night clubs are much, much more fun if your main goal is to spend the night to dance till you're soaking wet and cannot walk straight. Oddly enough it raises your chances with the girls just because of your attitude.
Hookups with the classmates - rather no, than yes. Shag someone from parallel class or better from different school. Especially if it's a ons.

Title	Dancing lessons Tips&Tricks
Author	j4c0p
Upvotes	101
Comments	34
Date	February 23, 2016 12:31 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/473z24/dancing_lessons_tipstricks/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/dancing-lessons-tipstricks.56488 https://theredarchive.com/post/56488

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