Original post was here

So.

Yesterday night, pretty late, she wrote a few texts to me saying she "didn't really like this thing" and she felt I had "grown less affectionate in the last few days". Since it was pretty damn late I replied we'd talk about it tomorrow, which is today.

A few minutes ago she called me. She was a mixture of depressed and passively-aggressively angry; she complained I had gradually stopped being affectionate and had "gone back to how you were when we first started dating" (i.e. my usual, old, genuine self).

I explained to her that I had cut back on the luv u talk because it had elicited the wrong response from her; that if she's distant and cold I have little reason to myself be open and enthusiastic.

There was some back and forth over this and other related things but I firmly stood my ground, stuck to my reasons and reasoning even when she started being angry or saying that she feared something was starting to go wrong with our relationship. I didn't flinch and kept to my view.

This is where it gets juicy(er).

I was kinda expecting this conversation to end with her being depressed and holding a grudge, but instead the most unexpected thing happened. She broke down crying (I could easily hear her sobbing on the end of the line, and she is the kind of girl that hates crying in front of people), saying that I had a gift for making people feel stupid and basically that she felt like a little girl who had built up a fantasy dreamworld of worries and troubles when there was nothing to be upset about (her words).

When she finally calmed down her mood changed. She sounded happy, she said she felt better, and we had a nice chill conversation about random shit. We parted ways with some affectionate words and I made sure not to give her more than she herself gave, even jokingly reprimanding her about it (she loved it).

Well, what can I say? what several of you told me (that she'd try to see whether I would stick to my guns) proved true, as well as that if I did stick to my guns it would have pretty positive results. The part about being the unflinching rock in the middle of her emotional storm felt like a pretty much perfect description; it was literally like I was standing there, calming having wave after wave of her emotions wash over me without me being affected at all. It's not that I didn't care because I do care about her, but I didn't let that warp my perception of reality or the fact that I would stick to that perception of reality.

Guys this shit is real good. Try it.