Hi lovelies this is a part rant and partly to ask the question, "Was I too harsh?",
Me and my best friend moved abroad for a teaching job (but in different regions). In December, she broke up with her ex who she'd said was the one etc and immediately started chatting to another French guy. About a month later they became exclusive and around the same time she was telling me how it was a bad idea to date people abroad because I went on a date when I went away to the Netherlands for a weekend. I was a bit taken aback by it because she moved on so quickly but I didn't say much and because it was just a date, I didn't take it seriously. Anyway, because of covid she left France a couple of months early. She mentioned in a conversation with some friends that after university she wanted to move back to France for a few years. A couple of months ago she'd said she wanted to move up North of where we're from to be near her ex boyfriend.
Anyway me, her and another close friend were doing a group call today and she was saying how her and her boyfriend have talked about moving in together when she moves back next year. When I asked how long they'd been together she said it hadn't been very long but she'd stayed at his for days at a time and vice versa and this was the healthiest relationship she'd been in. I replied back saying "Okay just be careful". She glared at me and said "What do you mean by that?". I very nicely explained that she hadn't been with him long enough to talk about moving in with him, that the relationship was in the honeymoon stage so she couldn't really say it was the healthiest relationship she'd been in and that she talked about moving in with her previous boyfriends so early on too and she changed her plans revolving them too. She replied back saying everyone had been negative about it, she'd thought it through and it was all a hypothetical situation and she was in love and I was being overly negative and critical. She proceeded to hang up by saying I'd annoyed her. Our other friend, who'd been listening to our argument told me she fully agreed with me and that I hadn't been rude in the slightest but my best friend had rose coloured glasses on atm.
I sent her a message apologising for upsetting her but that I wasn't going to tell her just stuff she wanted to hear. We argued a bit more and basically it ended up by her saying she didn't want to fall out with me over him so she just wasn't going to mention him anymore to me, since I was so negative over their relationship.
This is the first time we've actually had a huge argument over anything in the years we've been best friends. About a year and a half ago, I got into a long distance with a guy who lived in NL and we ended because he found a girl back home. That breakup crushed me and I obviously don't want her to go through the same thing. She's had four boyfriends in the two years we've been friends, I've had one.
Last year I was fairly pickme because I was always chasing after a new guy on tinder every other week but since moving abroad I've avoided men totally unless it's for the occasional date or freaky times. I have zero plans to date around next year just because I want to focus on my degree and enjoying my final year of uni before moving abroad (hopefully). I like to think I was being quite realistic but was I being overly harsh on her? I love her to bits and she's normally very supportive of me doing things like travelling solo but today she made me snap.
Sorry for the long post!
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