Men that value female friendships over your relationship need to go in the TRASH.
Story from my recent ex. When we were together I found out he was secretly meeting a girl to go skating by the beach. The same girl that he was meeting up with after we broke up for a month.
This girl is your standard pick me. She takes pride in being a bit of a slut and flirting with every man she comes across. My ex even told me “she has a nice body”.
When we were separated for one month they met nearly every day to go for walks on the beach, have lunch, he would take photos for her in a bikini for her instagram. I saw the texts. They were very clearly flirtatious and sexy. It’s not a brother/sister relationship.
So we get back together (I didn’t know the full extent of their meet ups) and I find out they have starting meeting up again every week. Just the two of them to go skating. Of course I’m not stupid and know that they probably also have lunch, talk about personal things, they discuss their relationships (he told me this), she is very open about discussing sex, and if they are both flirtatious then it’s a recipe for disaster. No doubt this girl goes skating in tiny shorts or tight leggings and my ex would 100% be staring at her ass if they’re doing an activity so physical.
Whether it’s ‘just sport’ or ‘just coffee’, your boyfriend with another girl doing these things, that’s a date. That’s an activity you should only do with your girlfriend.
After telling him it was enough and I was happy to leave the relationship, he starts making a huge ‘effort’ with me for a couple of weeks.
I ask him what has happened with the girl I was upset about. He said, I went skating with her last week. So basically his idea of apologising was just to distract me whilst he continues to do exactly the same thing that upset me. He was astounded when I told him this was bullshit.
His exact words: “She’s just a friend. We have known each other many years, since we were kids. I love her.... as a friend! I’ve known her and gone skating with her since before I met you! I didn’t tell you about it because I knew how you would react. If you don’t like it, I’m not going to change. You can take a few days to think about it, and let me know, because we will have to separate if you won’t don’t want me to spend time with her. You don’t want me to have friends. It’s just skating!! If you loved me you would let me do what I want. She helped me when my ex girlfriend broke up with me. She’s a bit of a slut but she’s a nice girl”
Bare in mind, he told me to my face that he doesn’t love me and doesn’t know what love is. Yet he tells me he loves this girl. So just because he has known this girl for 20 years, she should have priority over me? It doesn’t matter how long a guy and a girl have been ‘friends’ at least one of the two wants to fuck the other. The sexual tension will always be there and that’s the real reason they want to keep the friendship.
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