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[–]ladysilkwormFDS Newbie83 points84 points85 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]extraacct1234Ruthless Strategist28 points29 points30 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[+][deleted] [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link
I don't agree that its desperation for a relationship. There's a large age difference, this man is an abuser who has likely been love bombing and grooming her for the abuse until now. She may be second guessing herself because of previous gaslighting and subtle attacks to her self esteem over time. Women who stay in abusive relationships do not stay because they are "desperate for a relationship." It's so much more complicated than that. They've been brainwashed to think it's their fault and they aren't perceiving reality correctly. Fear of being alone can be involved but only because they have been made to be completely dependent on the partner and gaslighted to believe that they have no where to go and won't make it on their own if they leave. Especially if they grew up in abuse, this kind of behavior isn't immediately alarming because they are so accustomed to their boundaries being crossed it feels normal. Yes, this girl needs therapy and it is very obvious that she needs to leave immediately to those on the outside. But being in the abusive relationship makes it very hard to see clearly due to gas lighting.
[–]666manhater666 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
Thank you! It's so important to maintain empathy for women in abusive relationships and not make judgements like "they must be desperate to put up with that." She's probably not, it's just as you said she doesn't understand the juxtaposition between the way he's treated her until now and rape. It's a common defense mechanism to blame herself. Make no mistake, strong confident woman who take no shit from men can be reduced to the woman who won't leave her abuser given enough time and conditioning. It's why it's so important to recognize the early signs in a relationship! Things like red pill strategies such as negging and submission conditioning can be subtle and most women can't imagine that someone can be so purposefully evil. That the man who treats them like a queen and says he loves her actually hates her and all women, deep down. We need to raise awareness of this stuff.
[–]666manhater666 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]666manhater666 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link