ALL men benefit from the actions of bad, violent and repugnant men.

All men rely on the actions of violent, abusive and societally repugnant men to keep doing what they’re doing, in order to look good in comparison. The existence of “bad” guys make good guys look even better. All men benefit from the fact that the bar for men is so low, it’s in hell. Because then any kind of minimal effort on their part, is seen as magnanimous when compared.

It’s why when a woman complains about how her husband doesn’t do chores at home and is lazy, sits in front of his TV playing video games, people will tell her “well at least he’s not beating you or cheating on you”, or “well at least he’s working to provide”...conveniently adopting transient amnesia at the fact that most women nowadays also work. Yet these women still do majority of the household chores, childcare and organization.

It’s why men who take care of their OWN children and actively participate in day to day childcare, are often seen as superheroes or even worse, “babysitting”.

It’s why instead of focusing on the toxic abuser that hurt a woman, they turn on her and blame her by saying, “but look at all these other good men that you could have picked from, it’s your fault you chose wrongly”. They benefit from the bad men that exist to hurt women because it serves as some kind of punishment handed to women for picking a guy she was more attracted to, over the “good” i.e ugly/poor/small dick/boring/short/controlling/insecure one she was apparently supposed to pick.

It’s why the bro-code isn’t even based on lifting other men up for their accomplishments or success, nor is it meant to provide support, mental or emotional, to men that are struggling with failure or mental illnesses. Men don’t two fucks about other men, they kill each other even more than they kill women and are often emotionally unavailable for other men. It’s also why they try to use their gfs, wives or women in their lives as free therapists and unendingly unload their emotional baggage unto them. In short, their bro code only really exists to maintain misogyny.

It’s why the “notallmen” trope makes no sense. Because it IS all men. They either actively participate in misogyny, female manipulation and degradation for their benefit, or they revel in looking like the good ones in comparison, again for their benefit. If all men were good at baseline, then they know they would have to put in more effort to maintain relevance or attractiveness in women’s eyes, because then, “good men” would be a dime a dozen.