The 'Game' is Rigged?

MagicGainbow · 2013-11-22T14:20:25+00:00

I know exactly how you feel, the trick is to find something that fulfills you and do that, forget about women and concentrate on you for you not for them, also an LTR is not the best solution yet, hold off on that one.

No_DOX_for_you · 2013-11-22T16:52:28+00:00

Don't be hung up on fair. Either the effort you put into an activity is worth the reward you get from that activity, or it isn't. If it's worth it to you, then the question of who else also benefits and how much is meaningless. If it's not worth it, then stop and change your plan.

dre_day4 · 2013-11-22T19:25:52+00:00

I thought the same thing, then I realized that it was my ego taking control of my feelings. No point in competing with billions of others.

I just focus on improving myself, enjoying the process and cultivating my own happiness. If you follow any kind of Buddhist philosophy, happiness is already there. When I stopped putting women on pedestals, I was the one being put on them.

tl;dr: Do what makes you happy and the women will come. But make sure to put yourself out there. It's ok to have your ego bruised from time to time.

yankeetiger · 2013-11-22T16:54:42+00:00

Sex to you isn't the same thing as sex to her.

For men it is the end-all, be-all of the relationship; most guys have the explicit goal of getting laid when they go out. For her it's the gateway to what she really wants: your commitment.

Party_Liquor · 2013-11-22T16:54:10+00:00

Each gender has it's own unique problem. For the women the problem is sluts devaluing the currency. For men the problem is the betas begging for the pussy inflating it's value.

If all the men decided to just say fuck you to the women, then the value of pussy would immediatetly drop to almost nothing. It is literally all they have to trade with. At that point, the women would be begging to give the pussy away.

But, because of human nature this will never happen. And the women will always have the advantage because the inflating effect of the betas far, far outweighs the devaluing effect of the sluts. Thus pussy always trades at a premium to value.

Stayinghereforreal · 2013-11-22T14:29:34+00:00

How did us men become so disposable?

Labor-saving inventions and worker productivity make our muscle power less important than all prior generations. Couple that with our innate urge to sacrifice our own well-being for those around us, and we are lemmings diving off modernity's cliff.

The anomie you feel comes from modernity's current conditions. That anomie you are facing is common, and real. For at least 100 years philosophers and social science thinkers have been pondering what it means and what it leads to. No good answers yet.

Those of us facing the anomie have different responses. Some fall back into religion for comfort. Others simply adopt a classic Epicurean pose of, "Eat, sleep, sex, and merriment with friends is best in life, because after death, oblivion." Some find comfort in raising children, who may provide a great deal of enjoyment in life, or not, depending on the child and the parent/mate involved.

Not every person feels it. Some people go through life perfectly unaware of the question of existence--the "Why?" They simply accept that God loves them, and heaven awaits. Others feel that there is nothing except the cold chemistry of life, and then we wink out of existence when the reactions causing consciousness cease. Or the question simply never occurs to some people; they assume their sentience is eternal. Period. And the reality of their own impending death is inconceivable to them, even in their 80s.

You have to answer that question of "Why?" for yourself. I will tell you, however, that simply throwing yourself into a relationship, and trying to make a woman happy as the solution to the "Why?" of existence is the single worst blue pill response you could possibly have to that question.

nicethingyoucanthave · 2013-11-22T18:26:15+00:00

I'm constantly trying to be at the top of my game (i.e. be in the top 20%) just to be viable.

But try to look at it from the other side. First of all, a quality women does work hard to stay attractive. But more importantly, a lot of what makes her attractive is physical and changes as she ages.

When you say, "to stay viable" you mean that you're trying to make yourself attractive to a woman exhibiting signals of fertility (because even if you don't want kids, that's what you instinctively find attractive) - signals like general health (good skin and hair), child-bearing age, healthy weight, hormonal balance (that is, feminine features).

If you compromise on those things, then you can get laid every day of the week without difficulty. You just don't want to compromise, so you're going to have to fucking deal with it.

Similarly, if a woman were to talk about "staying viable" what she actually means is making herself attractive to man of high social status and with good genes - at least, initially that's what she means. Later in life the instinct changes and she looks for a provider.

From a woman's perspective, few men meet those standards. From their perspective they're in the same situation you're in. "Where are all the good men?" they ask. You're right that they can "kill" - getting laid whenever they want. But like you, they have to compromise to do it and they don't want to.

Keep working on yourself. Enjoy the journey because spoiler alert: you die at the end. Take pleasure in the chase and in every interaction, not just sex. Every so often, the planets will align and your game will be that of a superhero and you'll have a woman chasing you and longing for you in exactly the same way that every man chases and longs for most women - but few men have the opportunity enjoy from the other side. That is totally worth everything you've done to improve yourself.

You know what, there are so many men that never even talk to a solid 10 hottie, let along get to make her laugh, get to dance with her, maybe make out. If any of that is as far as you ever get with a girl like that, come on, you're winning.

Life is good, man.

2013-11-22T21:05:39+00:00

You are projecting, in the sense that sex is not what women are after, they are after commitment from an alpha.

I'm 99% sure sex is much much more fulfilling (and definitely less stressful) for the woman.

I believe it is the exact opposite when girls sleep around. They become jaded, not happy and bouncy. When they have consistent sex from an alpha, they are more fulfilled because it shows commitment from him.

EDIT:

They can just settle for a beta and live comfortably.

Yes, but what they really want is an alpha (with money). A beta will always pale in comparison. If all they do is sleep around, they will not be seen as relationship material by the alpha.

2013-11-22T16:03:17+00:00

I don't know what to say other than it's a sad reality. All these women need to do is breathe - men would fuck anything. They're gonna get to enjoy life regardless. A man just doesn't have that same luxury. He has to "pay dues" first, then people wonder why he's such a rotten person when he gets successful.

ihavespellingproblem · 2013-11-22T18:36:07+00:00

Problem is that you can't do much to swap tables, unless you go M2F. So at the end of the day you have two options - stay away or play.
Yes you wont have what chicks have. But you haven't yet tasted what you can get on the top either. Aren't you interested? Do you ever wonder what kind crazy kinky and awesome stuff you can experience? How far the envelope can be pushed?
Isn't it the primary drive of the game? I know for me, it is.

2013-11-22T19:43:17+00:00

Look, your thoughts and feelings on this are totally valid. Women get tons of handouts for just being women, and society backs it up. This is something that is never going to change. It will remain in flux and benefits will increase and decrease but coming from a man's perspective, it looks static.

Now can I ask you a question? Are you keeping yourself in the top 20% for you, or for your ability to attract women? From what you have written, it sounds like you are doing it for the ability to get new lays. Which is where the negativity can surface because you are basing your investments on returns. If you do this, you are going to have a bad time.

This outlook is incredibly difficult to change given our generation's beta-fication and a societal obsession with making women a focus of our lives. Look at all the "Men's" magazines where the covers and at least a sizable portion of an issue is devoted to winning hearts and minds, how to give better orgasms, how to completely devote your life to revolving around pussy (but to be manly at the same time). Given that many of these magazines are written and edited by women, it makes complete sense that they would advise these things. I am not even going to get into 3rd wave feminism, our single-mother generation, etc. But those are additional factors.

Face it gentlemen. We have been coded to have codependent relationships with women who's illness is self-absorption.

My recommendation to you, if I may, is to change it up. Could some of the fatigue that you are feeling be due to empty relationships with women? Maybe find some quality women out there. Find some good guys and focus on being a friend. Work on yourself.

You don't have any mental issues. You're feeling what I feel from time to time.

My last piece of advice. Promise.

Ignore the comparison between men and women and their ability to score. Yes its true that a lot of women have sex on command and that we as men see this as an unfair power distribution.

But its empty man. And the women who abuse it are miserable and jaded. You can't put yourself in a woman's shoes. So, you can't assume that they are in "paradise." I broke up with my ex about 5 months ago (she was in love with me but I wasn't with her). She became depressed and has been sleeping around a bunch (like 4 guys that she rotates). Now, is that power?

jeebusthecat · 2013-11-22T20:58:52+00:00

It's not rigged; it just plays very different between sexes. Look at the long term: I see lots of happy older (30+) men and lots of miserable older women. Talk to some older people. See who's happy and who's not.

Yes young women can fuck when they want, but they inevitably get chewed up inside for it. Even if they find a beta bucks, they're still going to be miserable sitting at home watching TV. Boring miserable life.

If you don't rely on your innate talents to get what you want in the here and now, then you have a shot at real self-fulfillment.

selfsufficientnigga · 2013-11-23T03:18:39+00:00

You will need to slowly change the paradigm from 'I'm putting all this effort in for purpose of acquiring pussy' to 'I'm putting all this effort in for purpose of improving myself and my own life'.

I agree that the investment:return ratio when it comes to getting pussy is pretty bad, and that the difference in needed effort between men and women is pretty unfair. We all wish it were more simple and equal, but it's not.

And we didn't 'become' disposable, we always were. We are actually living in good times now in my opinion, because we can get more educated about intersex dynamics, and see with our eyes open. So no matter how much the rest sucks, we can learn to avoid it.

TheeRyanGrey · 2013-11-23T03:27:17+00:00

First things first: sex should never be stressful for you. ever.

If you convinced a woman that she should fuck you, a complete stranger, using nothing but your skills as a man, then you've already done your job. You've brought her the potential for happiness---And yes pussies, I'm equating female happiness to how satisfied they are in their relationship. You know who the angriest women on earth are: the lonely ones not getting laid. And since a majority of women don't approach men for fear of rejection, we are the ones bringing them happiness.

Your attitude towards sex and your attitude towards women are all wrong; In both situations you're spending way too much worrying about their happiness and not your own.

Go to the gym because excellent health is important and will keep you alive, and in better condition longer. Work hard so your later years are filled with vacations and freedom. Start doing things for YOUR happiness and stop worrying about bitches.

Also, if you get off, sex was a success. In fact, I occasionally like to see how quickly I can get off without giving a single fuck about her orgasm. Most guys think this is a death sentence but I've found, as always is with women, the less fucks I give, the more fucks they give.

2013-11-24T08:51:47+00:00

When I was studying martial arts my instructor talked about how you work so hard to reach the point in your training where what you do looks easy. That's true for all things. The point is you're supposed to suffer towards your goals and it's supposed to be a fucking battle every inch of the way, because hey, if it were easy everyone would be doing it and there would be no 'upper 20%'..

Also, please, /stop/ letting your success with women be your measuring stick for success as a man. All the qualities women look for in men are qualities that men should want for themselves. You should look at yourself improvement in terms of what it does for YOU, not what it does for women. Framing everything in the context of 'how will this please women?' is extremely low-value and extremely blue pill.

roe_ · 2013-11-22T15:14:20+00:00

To answer one of your questions: It was always thus - men have always had to compete and perform to acquire the attention of women. On the other hand, women have always had the unenviable ordeal of childbirth so maybe it somewhat evens out...

Regardless, you seem to find the type of sex your having unfulfilling. Honestly, I find emotionally connected sex to be awesome, and I'm pretty sure it's because of the emotional connection to the person I'm fucking that makes it fulfilling. That may mean for you an LTR, or it may mean a FWB arrangement where there's a little more interest in the person for reasons other then sex. But the connection to that other person may be the key for you.

TRPinitiate · 2013-11-22T14:24:25+00:00

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namae_nanka · 2013-11-22T22:04:10+00:00

And the kicker? I'm 99% sure sex is much much more fulfilling (and definitely less stressful) for the woman.

It's like feminism getting everything from men for free and then men have to pay back even more in the name of equality. Men give during sex and then pay for it! Once upon a time the prostitute landed in the dock for swindling a man out his hard-earned monies, today the Johns go into the slammer in progressive cuntries.

anal_cyst · 2013-11-23T04:48:23+00:00

years 35-45 are when the tables turn. I'm almost 30 and I'm already seeing women my age and thinking 'what happened'; meanwhile I've got girls 10 years younger than me making passes at me.

TRPinitiate · 2013-11-23T22:13:24+00:00

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birdwontquit · 2013-11-22T18:12:43+00:00

Sounds like you're letting other people's expectations dictate what you should be doing with your life. No wonder you're unhappy.

vengefully_yours · 2013-11-23T13:28:34+00:00

Men have always been disposable, its the nature of life on the planet. I feel you though, and it crossed my mind before. Sure some women don't need to work for it, some do, and if you hear them tell it they never get laid. Who gives a shit what they gotta do, or how much they enjoy it, I am getting mine, enjoying my life, and doing what the fuck I want to do. I live for me, not for women and sure as hell not for some stink on my dick. There is more to life then moist pink bits wrapped around my turgid member, that is a small albeit very fun part of life.

2013-11-26T02:15:58+00:00

That is probably the one thing most of us are bonding over, we all agree that being awesome is hard work. We're all here helping each other to be more awesome.

I'm not quite with you on sex being less pleasant for us men though. I am reading in your statement that you are treating sex as a performance on your part, where your role is to do a good job and make her feel good. You might find that you enjoy it a lot more if you stop giving a shit about her pleasure, you might be surprised to find that she enjoys it more that way too. My advice would be to free the beast, use her for your own satisfaction, stop giving a shit about her enjoyment (within reason of course).

From everthing I've read history wise, it seems that men have always been disposable, the elite men have always commanded most of the pussy and left the remainder fighting over a few scraps. We're the soldiers and laborers and risk takers that make civilization function and it can be a thankless miserable job at times. In this case though, I don't think feminism or politics is to blame, it is a product of biology and a reality that we just have to deal with, and no amount of protesting or legislation can change it. Sure, there have been times where values and religions and laws have made things a bit easier for us, but even in those times most men were being disposable and an elite few of them were fucking all the 10's.

angryadult · 2013-11-22T19:25:18+00:00

That 80/20 rule is for something closer to the animal kingdom. Or college. Somewhere where monogamy doens't play a strong role in the dynamics.

Monogamy takes a lot of people off the market. Sure, some women are just never going to take anything but that top 20%, but plenty of them are willing to take someone in the top 50%. Just a bit better than average.

Just live your life, continue being awesome, and the women will come. As you age, you also have a much wider swath of women who are attracted to you. If you're 24 looking for a 23-24 year old, they're all plowing the 30+ year old dudes who have their shit together. Focus on yourself. Make it a goal to be >100k by age 30. Get some new hobbies. Stop trying to get new girls all the time. The girls will follow when you're worth following.

Put another way: take 6 months for yourself. A self-imposed celibacy. Focus on self-improvement instead of ONS. You'll come out the other side a lot happier.

trplurker · 2013-11-25T03:13:38+00:00

Do I have some mental issue then

Yes you do.

How did us men become so disposable?

Evolution has made you thus. Stop crying about it.

It's very simple, the rules are rigged in the females favor because evolution only cares about maximum babies, your personal feelings didn't even register.

You can not "win" with these rules. There are only two possible ways to master this situation, one is to simply chose not to play, the MGTOW style. The other is to take a step back and realize something your perception for the rest of your life.

There are no rules.

And if there are no rules then you don't need to play by them. Learn to manipulate the system and to extract maximum self value.

Title	The 'Game' is Rigged?
Author	TRPinitiate
Upvotes	19
Comments	45
Date	November 22, 2013 2:16 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1r7ub2/the_game_is_rigged/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/the-game-is-rigged.8166 https://theredarchive.com/post/8166

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