how to tell people you are getting divorced?

runny452 · 2020-01-13T19:26:32+00:00

Hey man ! Don’t say anything-it no ones business to know your personal affairs just act as if nothing is going on -I tell people be like the president don’t be a siren 🚨 let them figure it out

mickiemantle · 2020-01-13T20:07:42+00:00

I just told immediate family or friends that I needed to talk to at the time. From there I just waited for others to ask me or the news to spread.

When was asked by neighbors or other friends, I would usually respond with "yeah, we're getting a divorce" and kept it very general so I didn't come off as bitter. If they wanted details and I felt like being a wise ass I would say the reason was I didn't get along with her new boyfriend.

Just give out as much info as you are comfortable with, if any.

random_topix · 2020-01-13T19:57:53+00:00

Most of my friends are on Facebook so I did a single blast there. Many already knew from my X.

delongpike · 2020-01-13T20:08:32+00:00

No need to say anything.

Let the drama leak out to other non-significant people via social media.

jeffrrw · 2020-01-13T20:25:52+00:00

I understand that. People that I have regular interaction with all know including major clients, colleagues, friends, family etc. My mental state and time are being greatly affected by this process and it impacts my relationships with all of them so I let them know. I dont share all the intricacies and emotions I am going through but they know.

Joe schmo doesnt need to know though! Random people with limited interaction, just be nice and try and get through it.

champybaby · 2020-01-13T20:42:04+00:00

Honestly, word gets out quick. People love to gossip about divorces, it seems.

daedalis2020 · 2020-01-13T20:57:46+00:00

Yeah, I tend to just tell it like it is, pretty much, "yep, getting divorced". Low on details.

sexytimeinseattle · 2020-01-13T21:15:27+00:00

“My wife and I split up. How about those Seahawks?”

CoatedWinner · 2020-01-14T00:27:02+00:00

I mean I obviously just brought it up with family and close friends, and whether or not it came up organically, they understood I needed to talk about it/tell them. Coworkers would ask and now its a bit of gossip enough that most people I work with know and sometimes they ask me about it.

I dont feel like I need to tell other people unless they ask specifically. I also dont feel the need to lie or not answer if someone asks. I just told them what was going on. After the divorce it sometimes comes up and sometimes not and it doesnt bother me either way.

Kipper1971 · 2020-01-14T01:47:57+00:00

I am not walking around telling my situation. I told my boss, HR/payroll at work, and 2 friends. When people ask me about how the family is, I say "fine". I still have 6 long months ahead of me and I am sure there will be plenty of "opportunity" to spill the beans.

When I am ready for dating, I might be more active in letting the right women know that I am single again ;-)

wormee · 2020-01-14T02:51:46+00:00

Oof this is the worst. I thought about a big announcement on social media but then decided against it. I told my family right away, we live kind of all over there place so not everyone knew we were having problems. I told close co-workers, but everyone else I told as it came up in conversation. It’s awkward no matter what you do but people are understanding. I was in the washroom at work when our big boss, a couple rungs up from my immediate supervisor, came in and said “wormee, how is you wife doing over at so and so division?” Me: “oh we split up six months ago” .... silence. He started to tell me he was sorry but I said don’t be, everyone is happier. Take it in stride, it’ll get sorted, worry about the hard stuff.

TimMorgan21 · 2020-01-14T08:17:17+00:00

Sorry to hear... How long have you been together?

When2BecomesU · 2020-01-15T06:29:27+00:00

However you feel comfortable. It's going to be awkward. Maybe unless you say, "Hey everyone let's point to someone who is married. Sorry Barry, you lose, shouldn't have pointed to me." The tricky part is once people know, not telling them too much. Then it suddenly becomes the only thing anyone wants to talk to you about.

SUEDE2BLACK · 2020-01-16T22:25:27+00:00

Don't tell anyone except your lawyer don't even tell your kids it'll be funny

dakingsQueen270104 · 2020-01-14T00:18:56+00:00

Before divorce was even mentioned did you and your wife even try counseling did you guys try to help each other out and whatever the issues are if so then yes get a divorce if nothing has worked if not then I think it’s kind of a selfish to go ahead and jump to a divorce unless one has not only broken their vows but also kick them down even further when they were at their rock-bottom I can only say mine on experience I was more than I can’t even explain on mine to do everything and anything to get things back right with my marriage even with all the darkness that has been in the past I never gave up I never walked away but just a few weeks ago it was my guardian angel honestly not only telling me in my gut because it had many of times before and that person is always lied and said it was in my head but this time I was able to get proof I wish nothing but the best for that person and I do still love them with all my heart but I love me more and seeing the difference between the both of us and when things get tough and who will really stick around and who will walk away and who will let others beat them down compared to how the other person would react if that happened on their part if the one that you married Starts to change you on the kind of person that you are where you start doing things that you would’ve never done before or say things that you would’ve never said before it’s time to just throw your hands up and see where it goes but when one steps out of the marriage whether it’s flirting or being physical with another person there’s no turning back that’s how I see it because when you’re lying to your husband or wife when they’re asking you are you talking to Or have you been with anyone and you lied and then they catch you in the live that’s when if the husband even had a little bit of an inkling of it’s gonna work out the wife completely destroyed it by doing that well as vice versa I wish you nothing but the best and hope in your near future you’ll find the happiness that you deserve as well as the person that your divorce him but always remember this there’s not one side to a story there’s Three sides there’s your side the other person side and the truth and only when you guys will be smart enough and honest enough and grown enough to say both

Title	how to tell people you are getting divorced?
Author	FlowHuman
Upvotes	5
Comments	20
Date	January 13, 2020 7:12 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/eo8pai/how_to_tell_people_you_are_getting_divorced/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-to-tell-people-you-are-getting-divorced.818780 https://theredarchive.com/post/818780

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